Even More Goodness

Greg Oden Almost Killed Jeff Green

2007-04-02T09:20:00.000-06:00

I talked about this dunk attempt this morning...had this gone in, it would have been a top 10 all-time college dunk. This is scary.

San Antonio, Part 4

2007-03-24T19:23:00.000-06:00

Ohio State 92 Memphis 76

And this is where it ends. Ohio State played its best game of the season, Memphis played merely average, and that was the difference. There are a number of talking points to go through after this one, but before I do that, I have to give a lot of credit to the Memphis fans for being very loud and being really supportive. There's no doubt the fans made a positive difference for the Tigers.

First things first. I said at the end of the last post that Joey Dorsey would have a chance to back up his big mouth with a big performance against Greg Oden today. He had that chance - and he blew it badly. It was obvious from the very beginning of the game that Dorsey's body language was off. He looked intimidated. He got into an argument or two with John Calipari on the bench. And, most obviously, he just isn't as good as Greg Oden. Oden scored the first basket of the game on Dorsey and that set the tone. Oden grabbed boards, affected shots, and scored on several low-post moves and big dunks. Dorsey fouled people and that was it. The Tigers got nothing from Dorsey or Kareem Cooper, and that made it almost impossible to beat Ohio State. Speaking of Cooper, it's time to be real - he needs to get in better shape and he needs to work a lot harder. He is a huge liability when he comes into the ballgame, and he hurt the team in this tournament.

Would Oden and the Buckeyes have been that good without Joey Dorsey making the comments he made yesterday? Maybe. I know it fired up the entire Ohio State team, though, and they played a fantastic overall game. They shot 51% from the field for the game and took care of the basketball. They dictated the tempo and got penetration whenever they wanted. This was their breakout game - the one that showed everyone why they're a number one seed.

To Dorsey's credit, he spoke with me and the rest of the media in the locker room after the game. Listen to the interview by clicking here. He's quite candid about how much better Oden is that he thought he would be, how tired he got covering Oden, and how he feels he let the team down. It is a positive sign for next year that Dorsey appears contrite and somewhat apologetic about what happened tonight. It doesn't change the domination.

Oden is incredible. Today, he played with passion and no little skill. He changes everything when he's in the game - he makes up for so many defensive errors because he can block any shot near the basket. His footwork is outstanding, and he's faster than you might think. He blocked a Willie Kemp layup attempt (should have been goaltending) when the ball was at least 12 feet off the ground. I am on record as favoring Durant over Oden should the Grizzlies get the first pick, but I have no doubt that Oden is going to be very much like his idol, David Robinson. He is a genuinely nice young man who seems very grounded despite the obvious fame he's achieved. I wouldn't mind seeing him win a national title.

Oden was involved in the game's pivotal play. There was a loose ball at midcourt with the Tigers up 60-57...Kareem Cooper was the closest to the ball, but Ron Lewis of Ohio State beat him to it, and passed in underneath to Oden for what appeared to be an easy dunk. CDR was down low with Oden and grabbed him around the waist, trying to prevent him from shooting. Oden made the basket and CDR was called for an intentional foul, his 4th foul of the game. Oden made one of two from the line, then OSU got the ball back, and that possession led to two Jamar Butler free throws. Overall, it was a five point swing. The game was never the same after that.

Mike Conley, Jr. was named the South Region's Most Outstanding Player, and it was a well-deserved honor. He was fantastic. It's hard to believe he's a freshamn - he got penetration whenever he wanted, and the Tigers were unable to stop him from doing much of anything. He dominated the game. John Calipari said after the game that the Tigers couldn't force their tempo on the game because Conley and Jamar Butler handle the ball too well and are too tough - that was another factor in OSU's favor.

Major credit goes to Jeremy Hunt, who immediately bailed the Tigers out of an early slump by hitting an early three. He played without fear, with reckless abandon, with desperation. It was to be his final game as a Tiger, and he played like it. Without him, the Tigers would have lost by a lot more than 16. He was never the most talented Tiger, but he might have been the toughest - and next season, the Tigers will miss that.

Willie Kemp, CDR, and Antonio Anderson all played pretty well, too. Fouls limited CDR a bit, and WIllie made a few freshman mistakes, but they were positives for the Tigers today.

Check out sports56whbq.com for a bunch of postgame audio, including interviews with Jeremy Hunt, Joey Dorsey, Chris Douglas-Roberts, John Calipari, and R.C. Johnson. Incidentally, R.C. told me that no one has contacted him regarding John Calipari's job status. Good news for Tiger fans.

I've enjoyed bringing you these road reports, and I hope you've enjoyed reading them and listening to the audio on sports56whbq.com. I'm headed back to Memphis tomorrow - a long day of driving awaits. Congratulations to Ohio State, but congratulations also to the Tigers for a tremendous tournament run and a great season. Next year should be even better.

San Antonio, Part 3

2007-03-23T18:42:00.000-06:00

Joey Dorsey Is Confident

Joey Dorsey is a confident player. Always has been, always will be. There was a time when this confidence was almost entirely misplaced, when Joey was just as prone to doing something dumb on the court as something productive. That has changed. His confidence level has not. As a result, he opened his mouth today during the media sessions at the Alamodome and controversy of a sort has ensued. There is a column by the generally inflammatory CBS Sportsline columnist Gregg Doyel making waves here in San Antonio. It sums up much of what Joey said.

Before I continue, you should know how the press conference situation works here in San Antonio. There is a session of about 30 minutes with the head coach and five selected "student-athletes" (the NCAA forbids officials from calling them players, lest we forget just how studious most of the student-athletes are), then the players go to individual "breakout rooms", where they meet with the media in more informal settings. It was in one of these breakout rooms where Dorsey made his comments. I heard some of them; some of them were made before I arrived at his room (I was talking with Dozier and Kemp before I talked to Joey). You can hear what I heard in the breakout room on sports56whbq.com.

Here's what Joey said...let's think about each statement.

"I think (scouts) really will be watching this game tomorrow night because it's two great big men going up against each other. I'm an underrated big man and he's a lot overrated as a big man."

I didn't hear this one in person. But it was a remarkably dumb comment at this time. No point whatsoever in calling Greg Oden overrated - he's played half the season with one hand...his bad hand, for crying out loud.

"I outrebounded (Oden) on the season. I'm the No. 6 rebounder in the nation, and I'm trying to move up to No. 1 after this game."

He did outrebound Oden in total rebounds, but Dorsey has played in more games. But he's not the number six rebounder in the nation. This one doesn't really call Oden out, it's just evidence of extreme confidence.

"I'm going to have a 20-rebound night"

He's never done that in his entire career. Inexplicably dumb.

"I'm Goliath. He's the little man."

This doesn't even make sense. Dorsey's wider, but Oden is taller and heavier. Plus, Oden is far more well-known nationally.

"He doesn't want to stay in the paint. He just wants to post up. I watched a couple games. He's not really playing in the paint. He likes to help-side (defend) and block shots. I haven't seen him against a great player play great defense."

Not sure who he considers to be a "great player", but Oden has certainly played great defense throughout the year. This comment is unnecessary.

Doyel didn't mention a few other quotes, including one in which Dorsey said that Oden gets "very tired" during games and tends to jog the court when he isn't involved in the offense (click here to listen to the quote). Dorsey said it was something he had noticed. Dorsey has put himself in a difficult position here. Oden has been playing somewhat tentatively throughout the tournament, and really hasn't broken out yet. Does Dorsey want to be the one responsible for that? Like it or not, he will be given "credit" for that if Oden goes off.

Dorsey has increased the pressure on himself immensely. He simply must perform tomorrow. There's no excuse. I don't think comments like this are smart at all, but if Dorsey can back it up, then more power to him. No sense in waking a sleeping giant, but that's apparently what Joey Dorsey wanted to do. We will find out just how good Joey Dorsey truly is tomorrow.

San Antonio, Part 2

2007-03-22T22:58:00.000-06:00

Memphis 65 Texas A&M 64
Ohio State 85 Tennessee 84

Just got back from the Alamodome after an incredible night of basketball. I can't imagine a more intense, crazier night of hoops anywhere. I wish I was a better writer, because it's hard for me to properly sum it up with my meager ability. But I will try.

I'll start with the Tigers. I cannot believe they won that game in the face of all the obstacles that presented themselves. The big storyline coming into this game revolved around two things: the crowd and CDR's ankle. The crowd was every bit as loud as imagined - 90% or more maroon...and they were really loud. It was an intense atmosphere, without question. My ears were ringing for minutes after I left the floor. As for the second part of the storyline, Chris Douglas-Roberts started the game and played an extraordinary game when his team needed it. He may not have been at his best, but he was close enough, and that's exactly what the Tigers needed.

Talking with him after the game (you can hear the audio at sports56whbq.com), he said he spent 24 hours a day working on rehabbing his ankle, and it showed. One of the trainers, coincidentally also named Chris, spent every waking hour with CDR, working on rehabbing the ankle, and that commitment to the rehab paid off in huge style. CDR was able to cut and drive enough to cause a few problems for Texas A&M. I have a lot of respect for his ability to get healthy. He deserves praise.

The Tigers managed to survive despite massive foul trouble, especially in the first half. Robert Dozier managed to pick up two quick fouls early and that forced the Tigers to go small, which allowed the Texas A&M bigs to get some very easy baskets. That was a major reason the Tigers went into the half down 5, and that was a major reason Texas A&M shot 58% in the first half. Joey Dorsey also picked up foul trouble, starting with his 2nd late in the first half. John Calipari tried to go with Kareem Cooper, but Kareem is just too slow and not good enough on defense to be trusted. He gave up a bunch of easy baskets, forcing Cal to go to Pierre Niles at one point. Niles was worse than Cooper. Yet, despite all that, the Tigers were still hanging around.

Great performance by Willie Kemp. He answered a lot of his critics with a big performance tonight, a performance made even bigger by the fact that Andre Allen did not play very well. Allen was just too short to be effective running out and guarding the Texas A&M shooters.

I also liked the gameplan tonight - I had talked about how Texas A&M doesn't guard dribble penetration well, and they didn't do it tonight - that was also a reason why Memphis shot so many more free throws than Texas A&M. It was a smart plan and it worked.

I thought the play of the game came when Jeremy Hunt answered an Acie Law IV three-pointer that had tied the game at 55 late in the second half. Law's three was the kind of shot that can change the entire momentum of the game, and for Hunt to nail a three right on top of Law was enormous. He showed real character.

And the end of the game was just crazy - huge offensive rebounds by Antonio Anderson led to two huge free throws. Make 0, Texas A&M likely wins; make 1, it's tied, make 2, the Tigers likely win. He made 2. I guess John Calipari was right - when they needed the free throws, they got them. Then, the controversial out of bounds play happened. The officials got this one right - the clock is supposed to start when a player touches the ball, and it doesn't stop until the ball TOUCHES SOMETHING OUT OF BOUNDS. Remember that when you hear people complaining about this call. If the ball goes out of bounds and stays in the air, the clock keeps going. That is the reason an extra 1.1 seconds were taken off the clock.

After that extraordinary win, the Tigers will face Ohio State, who won in their own extraordinary fashion. This one hurts for Tennessee and Volunteer fans. Tennessee played perhaps their best half of basketball all year in the first half of this one - they were up 49-32 at the break. Greg Oden had 3 fouls, and all was right. But the Vols got a little too lax. Ohio State jumped all over Tennessee at the beginning of the second half and tightened the game in a hurry.

Greg Oden was not a huge factor, but the Buckeye guards were. The Vols could not guard Mike Conley, Jr. off the dribble, and Ron Lewis continued to show why he is fast becoming known as the most clutch Buckeye. He had 25 and Conley had 17, offsetting a meager 9 and 3 from Oden. Bruce Pearl tried everything he possibly could to inspire his team, but nothing worked. Chris Lofton and Ryan Childress hit big threes, but in the end, Ohio State just edged it out to move into the Elite Eight.

San Antonio, Part 1

2007-03-21T16:37:00.000-06:00

First of all, it is a long-ass drive from Memphis to San Antonio. There's just no getting around that. I drove way too fast, but because of a couple of traffic problems along the way, it still took me almost 11 hours of driving to get here. That's a long way to go. And since it is a huge drive, and since the plane tickets are stupidly expensive from Memphis to San Antonio, I can completely understand why there won't be too many Tiger fans here for tomorrow night's game. I would even venture to bet that there will be more Tennessee fans because I suspect it is cheaper to fly from Knoxville or Chattanooga than it is from Memphis.

Make no mistake, though, there will be a jillion Texas A&M fans. There are already tons all around every part of Texas - one person described Aggie fans to me today as being "a little bit frightening". They are rabid for sure. And they have weird hand gestures and sounds they make as part of their Aggie fandom. Good folks so far, but very serious about the Aggies.

They also don't know much about Memphis. I asked one family what they knew about Memphis, and the mom said, "I know they wear orange!". So, not the most knowledgeable about Memphis, then. They know Cal and they know that CDR is hurt. Not much else.

The Alamodome is enormous, and it will be unique territory for the Tigers. I don't think any of them - and I don't think any Tiger team, ever - will have played in a structure this big. Maybe an early Tiger team played Tulane in the Superdome a long time ago...we were debating that over at the Dome. But I can't imagine any of these players ever being in an arena like this. It is a little disconcerting - they've basically split the dome in half, with one side being the court and stands, with some seats rolled in to close out the rectangular court. On the other side of the curtain is all the media areas - interview rooms, dining area, satellite uplink, etc. It is gigantic. Everything is indeed bigger in Texas.

Today was open practice/press conference day. I don't really care much for it, as it really doesn't tell you much about the teams - the interviews can sometimes be revealing (and in the case of A&M coach Billy Gillispie, introductory - at least for Memphis media), but there's a lot of pomp and circumstance that signifies little.

Chris Douglas-Roberts was not seen at the Alamodome today. He did not practice, nor did I see him even with the team. He is getting constant treatment, and the general thought around here is that he will play, but he will not be 100%. He is a tough kid, and I have a strong suspicion he will give it a go, but I just don't know how effective he will be. This is going to be a brutal game - very physical and very intense - and if he isn't going all out, I just don't know if he will do much good. We will see. He's a calming influence, and the Tigers will need him for that reason, if none other.

I was impressed with Joey Dorsey's interview today - go listen to him and Jeremy Hunt via the link on sports56whbq.com. He was candid, funny, and revealing. He's normally not much of a talker, but he's really come out of his shell as of late. He is also going to be massively important for the Tigers tomorrow night; A&M aren't deep in the frontcourt and Joey can do damage if he plays well.

The Tigers were very sluggish throughout their open workout today. A lot, and I mean A LOT, of missed shots were thrown up by the Tigers. I don't know if they were tired from their earlier closed practice, or just going through the motions, but it wasn't impressive at all. Again, these open practices don't mean much, so I'll just let John Calipari's words to his team sum it up: "Better get all these misses out of your system today!"

Tennessee looked relaxed and calm as they prepared for Ohio State. They did more drills than the Tigers did (relatively speaking, of course, since very few teams actually do any serious practicing at these things). Bruce Pearl was as funny as ever on the podium - he was asked about John Calipari's proposal for Tennessee fans to cheer for Memphis tomorrow night (and vice versa), and he chuckled. He laughed harder when he was told that John had promised to wear an orange T-shirt for the game. Pearl said that if Cal did that, he would wear a blue blazer.

More telling was his comment that he didn't see any way that most Memphis fans would cheer for Tennessee. That is probably very true.

Finally, I saw Greg Oden is person for the first time. HUGE. The guy is large. And he looks as old as you would expect, since he already looks like Robert Parish's cousin. He was very fluid for a big man, and he certainly moves well. I am very interested in watching him play live tomorrow night.

San Antonio is a cool city - very laid-back and low-key. I could definitely see myself taking a little vacation here. I thought the Riverwalk would be overrated, as so many of these tourist destinations tend to be, but it's actually very pretty, and there's a lot of great food and drink to be found along it. I'm staying in one of the two Marriotts on the Riverwalk. For some reason, San Antonio has two separate Marriott hotels literally 200 feet apart. Both are huge. It's a bit strange. And of course I went to the wrong one as I tried to check in.

New Orleans, Part 3

2007-03-18T18:15:00.000-06:00

Memphis 78 Nevada 62

A very interesting game, and undoubtedly a huge win for the Tiger program. Looking at the larger picture, there can be no doubt that two straight Sweet 16 appearances is a major coup for John Calipari. There aren't many schools that can say that. The Tigers will now face Texas A&M in San Antonio for the right to play in the Elite Eight.

Going into the matchup with Nevada, it was obvious that the big concerns for the Tigers would be Nick Fazekas and Marcelus Kemp. Fazekas you probably knew a bit about - he is an All-American, after all - but Kemp was a bit more unknown. It was Kemp who was far more dangerous throughout the game. Kemp hit several big shots, made several key plays, and was a handful for Tiger defenders all day long.

Today's game confirmed my opinion on Nick Fazekas - overrated. Way overrated. Against the elite athletes of Memphis, he was largely overmatched. I cannot believe that he is rated as a first round draft prospect as of right now on several draft sites. He will get killed in the NBA. He made some nice plays, but he's just not very quick or very strong - he finishes very weakly around the basket for a guy of his size. Kemp will be a better NBA player.

Starting out, and throughout the entire game, the Tigers were shaky around the basket. They must have missed at least 10 layups throughout the game. The conversation between me and some of the Memphis media folks at halftime centered around just how in the world the Tigers were only up by 4 while dominating the game in huge stretches. There's no question that the Tigers should have been up by at least 10 - missed layups, missed 3's, defensive lapses cost them.

All of that could have cost the Tigers dearly. What could have cost them even more today, and what may cost them on Thursday, is the injury to Chris Douglas-Roberts. CDR landed hard on his ankle with about 8 minutes or so to play - it looked nasty. The Tigers had to play the final minutes without him, and may be without him in San Antonio. The early word is that it's a mild to moderate ankle sprain, which is actually good news. It could have been a torn ligament. Without CDR, things got a little dicey at first - Doneal Mack and Willie Kemp were asked to play key roles and they were clearly very nervous. Calipari had to take them out to make sure the game didn't get out of hand.

Robert Dozier was fantastic throughout the game, but he came up huge late - he made play after play, including a sequence where he grabbed two massive rebounds. He outmuscled Nick Fazekas for a board late in the ballgame...that summed up the difference in the teams. Fazekas, an All-American, had never faced opposition as athletic as the Tigers, and he was beaten to the spot by largely unheralded Robert Dozier. If Dozier can continue to play like this, the Tigers will be hard to beat.

Andre Allen was big yet again - he is the most clutch player the Tigers have. Jeremy Hunt was frustrating for large stretches of play, but ultimately did a lot of very important things for the Tigers. For him, it must be especially thrilling to actually be a part of a Sweet 16 team after looking on last year from the outside.

Very loud Tiger crowd here in New Orleans. The Tigers had the largest contingent of fans here in town, and they were the rowdiest as well. John Calipari repeatedly spoke of just how important the fans were to the team's performance in the first two rounds of the tournament. On the other hand, the Nevada fans were more numerous than you might have thought, especially given just how far they had to travel. I think it should also be noted that one of the members of their Pep Band had his head completely shaved expect for a giant "N" of hair. Very disturbing.

Random Larry King tourney thoughts...Tennessee against Memphis in the Elite 8? Only two wins away...speaking of Tennessee, very impressive effort against Virginia, especially JaJuan Smith and Ryan Childress...Florida has a cakewalk into the Final Four, but they'll have to play better than they did today...Seeing them both in person has cemented the fact for me that Al Horford is going to be a much better NBA player than Joakim Noah...I don't know if Tubby saved his job with the Wildcats' tourney performance...USC is apparently much better than people gave them credit for; next stop for Kevin Durant? Memphis?...fantastic action yesterday in the tourney...Ohio State should certainly have lost; Ron Lewis has serious guts; Tennessee could cause them trouble...Wisconsin had the worst tournament of any team out there...My Final Four is unchanged.

Be sure to go to sports56whbq.com and check out the sound from New Orleans. And keep it here on my blog as I head to San Antonio in a couple of days.

New Orleans, Part 2

2007-03-16T16:32:00.000-06:00

Memphis 73, North Texas 58

That was a lot closer than Memphis wanted it to be. There's no question that Memphis can play a hell of a lot better than they did today in New Orleans, and you can bet they'll have to on Sunday if they want to make it to the Sweet 16 in San Antonio.

For some reason, the Tigers came out very, very flat. No intensity at all throughout the first 7 or 8 minutes, and it showed on the scoreboard - North Texas jumped out to an early lead, one they held for the first 12 minutes of the game. In the midst of North Texas' hot start, the Tigers did find a spark of intensity, but it was misdirected. Chris Douglas-Roberts, normally a very cool customer, lost his head in a big way after committing his second personal foul. He exchanged words in a minor skirmish with Kendrick Davis of North Texas, and picked up a technical foul in the process. Despite finishing as the game's high scorer, CDR was well below par, as was his backcourt partner Antonio Anderson.

Anderson turned the ball over 3 times without dishing a single assist. That's not good enough - but to be fair to the young man, he did play good man defense against the dangerous UNT guard Calvin Watson. UNT had several dangerous players, including post presence Keith Wooden (anyone named Wooden has to be dangerous in March). Wooden abused Joey Dorsey early in the ballgame, and forced Dorsey to significantly pick up his defense as the game progressed. Dorssey admitted as much in the postgame press conference, which you can hear in its entirety on sports56whbq.com. Dorsey improved, though, and was a monster on the boards. He finished with 15 for the game.

Robert Dozier was superb in the first half, picking up 4 blocks and several big rebounds. His offense still needs work, but he was a contributor today. But for me, the player of the game was Andre Allen, who played a career-high 36 minutes because he was just so effective. He picked up the energy for the Tigers as soon as he hit the court, and made himself a nuisance defensively while hitting big shots offensively. Once again, in the NCAA Tournament, he showed he is a baller.

The Tigers will play Nevada in the second round on Sunday afternoon, after Nevada beat Creighton in overtime 77-71. It was a really good game, with neither team able to secure a lead above 7 the entire game. Nick Fazekas gets all the hype when people talk about Nevada, and he had a pretty good game, but Nevada was led by a huge effort from guard/forward Marcelus Kemp. He finished with 27 points, 12 rebounds, and 4 assists, and was so aggressive in getting to the basket and making plays. He will be a handful for the Tigers.

Nevada's not terribly athletic, from what I saw, but they've got skilled bigs who can shoot - they're quite tall and long, and all of them (especially Fazekas) can nail the 3. They turned it over a bit much, though, and the Tigers can certainly take advantage of that weakness. Fazekas actually reminds me a lot of Pau Gasol in many ways. He plays with the same languid style - it doesn't always look like he's trying that hard. He can shoot better than Pau, but isn't nearly the inside threat Pau is. And I'm sure you hate him even more now that I said that.

Nevada's coach also has a bit of an anger control problem. According to humorously-named New Mexico State University Police Officer Quent Pirtle, Coach Mark Fox had a slight problem with the officials in Nevada's WAC Tournament loss to Utah State, and let them know it.

"As Mr. Fox continued to curse and be abusive toward the officials, he continued to close distance," Pirtle wrote. "I placed my hand on the back of the last official and tried to hurry him up the ramp."

Pirtle said at that point Fox was about 2 feet away.

"I slowed down and put my hand across his chest to prevent him from getting any closer to the official," Pirtle said.

The officer said Fox told him, "Don't put your [expletive] hands on me."

"I told Mr. Fox to back off and again pushed against him to keep him from the officials," Pirtle said.

He got pissed again today at a no-call. This guy is seriously going to flip out one day and go Bobby Knight on someone. He's a bit high-strung. Oh yeah, one other thing - the Creighton cheerleaders are way, way, WAY more attractive than you would expect a bunch of Omaha girls to be.

The crowd wasn't huge (13,000 or so), but it was very loud and active for both games. I would estimate the Tigers had more fans than any other team in the first session, but Nevada traveled very well considering how far Reno is from New Orleans. Former Tiger DB (and former Saint) Mike McKenzie was in the house, looking very much like Lil' Jon. I mean, I fully expected him to drink from a jeweled cup and yell, "YEAAAAUUUUHHHHHHH!!!!!"

Finally, some notes, Larry King-style...my bracket is a shambles. I somehow managed to pick George Washington. That didn't turn out well...DUKE IS OUT OF THE TOURNAMENT IN THE FIRST ROUND! Oh, it was awesome to see Eric Maynor just abuse Greg Paulus, take him way out of his game mentally, then drain a huge jumper to win the game. Sorry, Coach K, your team sucks far more than your commercials...How about Tennessee putting up 121 on Snoop, Dre, and Long Beach State? When did Bo Kimble become a Vol?...Wisconsin is very boring and I had hoped beyond hope that Texas A&M-Corpus Christi would beat them. They didn't...I was impressed with Virginia's guards; Sunday's UVA/Tenn matchup will be a fun one to watch...Verne Lundquist and Bill Raftery are really good guys...hope tonight's games are good, because so far, this has been a boring tournament.

Off to Bourbon for a little relaxation. More Sunday or Monday.

Pure Wisdom: My Tourney Picks

2007-03-15T07:51:00.000-06:00

Rather than give you a whole long spiel about my picks, I figured I'd just show you:

Click here for my bracket (PDF file).

New Orleans, Part 1

2007-03-15T05:03:00.000-06:00

I arrived yesterday afternoon about 4 or so...no major issues on the road from Memphis to New Orleans, but that changed upon arrival here in the Big Easy. I did what I normally do when taking a road trip - I print out directions from Mapquest or some such, and 9 times out of 10, that's fine. This was the 10th time out of 10. I was instructed to get off at Exit 234B, which seemed easy enough on paper. The big problem emerged when I found out there is no Exit 234B - at least none that I could see.

So I rolled on past the area where I should have exited, and got off somewhere else...and was immediately lost in New Orleans. Great. But I figure I'm smart enough to find my way around downtown N.O. - I know what streets to look for, and I know roughly where I'm supposed to be, so it shouldn't have been a problem. There was one slight issue, though...probably 25-35 percent of the intersections I saw had no street sign at all. No sign whatsoever. I had to basically drive around and just sort of hope I managed to find the right street. I eventually did.

I was told last night by a couple of locals that people who came down here to help rebuild or do construction work have been helping themselves to authentic, 100% New Orleans, LA street signs! Apparently those street signs are made of gold or something, because the New Orleans city government has not replaced them at all. I wish they would. It would have made my trip a bit easier.

The hotel is nice, and isn't far from the French Quarter. A few of us headed out to Bourbon Street last night and had fun. Oddly enough, I didn't see one single Tiger fan, but I saw two, count 'em, TWO Nevada fans. I assume Tiger Nation hasn't made it down here yet. Most of the fans haven't arrived yet - or, if they have, they weren't on Bourbon. I know they're coming.

I'll be back with more later.

Team Videos Are Usually A Bad Idea

2007-03-09T11:57:00.000-06:00

After I posted the Redskins video below, it inspired me to find more old promotional team videos. Of course, all team videos ever produced will have to be compared with the legendary Super Bowl Shuffle:

That's the gold standard. Sure, it's cheesy and hasn't really aged well, but it's a classic. We are the Bears, shufflin' crew, etc. That's what it's all about. These other videos have been forgotten, and rightly so.

But I've spent (too much) time running some of the worst offenders down, and here they are, in no particular order:

1987 CALGARY FLAMES: "Red Hot"

BEST VISUAL: The close-up of Lanny MacDonald's almost impossibly bushy mustache as he prepares to open up the lip syncing magic. Like the best horror movies, it is partly frightening and partly enthralling.

BEST LYRIC: The chorus - "You can't touch a flame when it's red hot, you can't put the fire out. Like a magic thing (?) that can't be bought, you can't touch a flame when it's red hot!" Profoundly stupid.

1986 NEW YORK METS: "Lets Go, Mets Go"

BEST VISUAL: You won't believe me when I tell you, but Joe Piscopo makes an appearance about halfway through, informing us that the "big story" is that the '86 Mets are awesome. He then defies the odds to make the video even dumber by tapping ACTUAL MET PLAYERS' HEADS to make them bobble, a la commemorative bobbleheads. This is worse than it sounds. Bonus points for including Joe Piscopo, though.

BEST LYRIC: "Where there's a Met man, you'll find a Mets fan." What does that even mean?

1986 DALLAS COWBOYS: "Christmas in Dallas"

BEST VISUAL: State-of-the-art technology allows the Reunion Ball and the Bank of America building (you know, the one with the green lighting bordering it at night) to combine into one badass 1986 Christmas Tree! How did they do it?? (Close second: a seemingly drugged Danny White struggling with his lip syncing parts)

BEST LYRIC: "When there is snow covering the ground, there's one thing I know - there is no better place I have ever ... fo-ound!" Too many words. Condense it, fellas.

1987 MINNESOTA TWINS: "Berenguer Boogie"

BEST VISUAL: This entire video is garbage. But certainly the creepiest visual is a shot of a bunch of children followed immediately by a (lingering) shot of a trench coated man's crotch, panning up to reveal Mr. Berenguer. Off-putting. Arguably the best visual comes when Juan Berenguer (still in trench coat) "dances" with a bunch of fitness models with giant permed hair.

BEST LYRIC: The chorus. "The Berenguer Boogie, (unintelligible - sounds like "I will ask, he will know"), The Berenguer Boogie, Señor Smoke." Maybe this is better with the unintelligible part intact.

SPECIAL NOTE: What's with all the trench coats? Was Juan Berenguer a trench coat salesman or something? Were the Twins flashing fans in the offseason? Very weird.

1988 FLORIDA STATE: "Seminole Rap"

BEST VISUAL: It's gotta be either Burt Reynolds' brief appearance at the very beginning of the video, or "Chip and Pete", the whitest QBs ever, trying to look like something other than two huge dorks. They fail.

BEST LYRIC: Also courtesy of "Chip and Pete" - "I'm Chip, I'm Pete, and we're the QBs; we've got the best job, as you can see...No matter what you do, we're gonna score, and if you make us mad, we'll score some more." I bet Chip and Pete aren't scoring as much these days.

Anyone know of any more recent terrible team videos? The Grizzlies ought to make one soon.

The 1986 Redskins Have a Message For You

2007-03-09T09:06:00.000-06:00

A lot of people have huge nostalgia for the 80's, for some reason. Oh sure, there were many good things that happened in the 80's - Nintendo, Phoebe Cates, Porky's, MTV, Who's the Boss, ALF, parachute pants, I mean the list really is endless. Of course, not everything reached that epic level of awesome.

The 1986 Redskins made a video thanking all their fans (thanks to the outstanding Dan Steinberg at the DC Sports Bog for finding this beauty). As one of those fans back in 1986 (and now), I appreciate the sentiment. But not the video. This video was produced in the 80's and is decidedly not awesome. Well, not for its intended reasons. It combines all the Casio-keyboard-inspired rhythm of a Midnight Star video with all the awkwardness of an 8th grade dance. Here are a few highlights to look and listen for:

The fans' complete lack of rhythm throughout the song (but especially at the start)
Jay Schroeder looking very, very confused
Russ Grimm and his caterpillar mustache attempting to "rap"
Professional football players line dancing
Players punctuating the word "loyalty" by thrusting their groins
So much creepy, unsettling line dancing
Ray-Bans, Ray-Bans, Ray-Bans
Darrell Green's angry rapping
WILLARD SCOTT!
Doug Williams' very bad rapping
A police car carrying an enormous Redskins wind sock
The pièce de résistance: a slow-motion Fun Bunch high five!

Watch it:

Tyrus Thomas Is Somewhat Athletic

2007-03-06T00:22:00.001-06:00

This might be the best play in the NBA this year.

Billy Packer Should Be Fired

2007-03-05T11:03:00.000-06:00

If anyone can watch this and tell me Billy Packer is anything other than a shill for Coach K and the Dukies, then they're insane. Packer knows how bad Gerald Henderson's forearm shiver to the face of Tyler Hansbrough looks (and is), and he goes into full defense mode to protect his buddy Mike Krzyzewski. It was full of belligerent repetition of the "it was unintentional" line; repetition that barely extended Jim Nantz a chance to respond. At this point, Packer sounds like nothing more than a grumpy old man with an axe to grind.

Actually, forget a regular grumpy old man. Packer sounds like THE Grumpy Old Man.

Grumpy Old Man: I'm oooooold! And I'm not happy! And I don't like things now compared to the way they used to be. All this progress -- phooey! In my day, we didn't have these cash machines that would give you money when you needed it. There was only one bank in each state -- it was open only one hour a year. And you'd get in line, seventeen miles long, and the line became an angry mob of people -- fornicators and thieves, mutant children and circus freaks -- and you waited for years and by the time you got to the teller, you were senile and arthritic and you couldn't remember your own name. You were born, got in line, and ya died! And that's the way it was and we liked it!

Life was a carnival! We entertained ourselves! We didn't need moooovin' pitchurrrres. In my day, there was only one show in town -- it was called "Stare at the sun!" ... That's right! You'd sit in the middle of an open field and stare up at the sun till your eyeballs burst into flames! And you thought, "Oh, no! Maybe I shouldn't've stared directly into the burning sun with my eyes wide open." But it was too late! Your head was on fire and people were roastin' chickens over it. ... And that's the way it was and we liked it!

Progress?! Flobble-de-flee! In my day, when we were angry and frustrated, we just said, "Flobble-de-flee!" 'cause we were idiots and we didn't know what else to say! Just a bunch o' illiterate Cro-Magnons, blowin' on crusty handkerchiefs, waitin' in lines for our head to burst into flame and that's the way it was and we liked it!

"In my day, Coach K never did nuthin' wrong! And that's the way it was, and we liked it!"

In Defense of Pau

2007-02-27T08:18:00.000-06:00

I was embarrassed by what I saw at the Forum last night. Once again, Pau Gasol was booed loudly by a huge section of Grizzly fans in his home building as the Grizzlies lost to Denver 111-107. Pau wasn't great in the 4th quarter, and missed 3 key free throws in the final minutes of the game. But that doesn't justify the treatment he's receiving from large numbers of Grizzly fans.

First, the facts. Pau Gasol did ask to be traded. He did so by going to Majority Owner Michael Heisley and GM Jerry West separately and asking to be moved, if possible. Heisley gave Pau assurances his request would be considered; West did as well, though privately West was said to be seething. Pau did not make this request public. Somehow, Peter Vecsey found out about the official trade request and his initial report opened the subsequent floodgates of media coverage - coverage that Pau Gasol did not seek. Pau did not pout or moan or throw a fit to try to get traded; on the contrary, his numbers and contribution to the team remained high amid speculation about his future.

But none of that matters to some Grizzly fans. Many people have never liked Pau - ever - and have found any and every excuse to boo him at the Forum. Pau misses a FT? Boo him. He misses a jump shot? Boo him. He gets beaten on defense? Boo him. Never mind the fact that almost every Grizzly is defensively deficient at one time or another, never mind the fact that he has consistently put up 20 points and 9 rebounds shooting 50% or more from the field, never mind the fact that most NBA scouts consider him at least a top 10 (maybe a top 5) offensive player from 15 feet and in. None of that matters to the haters. All that matters is that Pau is either soft, or foreign, or weak, and they boo.

Is it Pau's fault that the organization hasn't built a proper team around him? They identified Pau as their centerpiece when they signed him to his max contract, yet they have utterly failed to build a team around his strengths. They've not drafted players to suit Pau, they've not signed free agents to suit Pau, and yet they expect Pau to singlehandedly lead this team out of the doldrums. The blame for that lies squarely at the feet of Jerry West and the Grizzlies. It's one thing to pay a guy and identify him as your centerpiece, it's another to actually build something around him. Pau is never going to be a tough guy. Never ever. This shouldn't have to be repeated over and over. He needs a bruiser next to him, a guy like Ben Wallace. That's why a move to Chicago would have been perfect for Pau and for the Bulls. Wallace could guard the more physical big on defense, hiding Pau's weakness a bit (and allowing Pau's defensive strength - shotblocking - to be emphasized), while Pau could absolutely go nuts on offense.

Look at Kevin Garnett. He's an immensely talented, very tough, incredibly driven athlete. And he's saddled with an organization that has failed to build around him. So what has he won? Nothing. Only once, when the team added Latrell Sprewell and Sam Cassell to complement him, did KG win a playoff series. But does KG get booed? Of course not. He's lauded for his determination. Perhaps he asked to be traded - we don't know. We wouldn't have known about Pau's request except that someone in the Grizzly organization leaked the information. And you wouldn't have known by Pau's play - he's looked precisely the same throughout this season.

By the way, who among you wouldn't explore other avenues of employment if at your company the following things had happened:

Your boss had been fired and replaced by an interim boss of questionable qualification (who himself will soon be replaced by an unknown entity).
Your company owner was publicly looking to sell your company to a group promising to cut costs and rely on underpaid young talent.
Your company had already failed to give you the tools and coworkers you needed to be truly successful in your job.
You were constantly criticized publicly for your effort and your product despite having won award after award and being the best at your company year-in, and year-out.
You had been sick for a while, but you rushed back to work because your company needed you, only to be criticized for a lack of production as your were trying to get back into the swing of things.

If all that happened to you, wouldn't your résumé be on Monster.com within seconds? Of course it would. Pau can't do that, so his only recourse is to request a trade.

After having been booed virtually all season long, and after seeing thousands of fans last night cheering louder for Allen Iverson and Carmelo Anthony than they did for him, Pau was understandably miffed. Here are some quotes:

Pau Gasol says it is "mindblowing" that Grizzly fans don't support him.

He thinks some Grizzly fans were happy that Denver beat the Grizzlies last night.

I can understand his frustration. It makes Memphis look like a low-class city when the fans boo the best Grizzly player consistently for petty reasons. He's far and away the best player on the team. How do you think it makes Rudy Gay feel to see the best player on the team booed mercilessly? He must wonder what it takes to satisfy Grizzly fans - and he probably wonders if he'll ever get booed if he screws up. That's no way to endear yourself to a group of players. Hakim Warrick missed key free throws late in the Spurs game last year. That cost them a game - does he get booed? He plays no defense - does he get booed? Lawrence Roberts missed free throw after free throw last year in Boston, costing the Grizzlies a game...does he get booed? Mike Miller plays no defense. Does he get booed?

For that matter, Carmelo Anthony is great on offense, plays no defense, has only made one All-Star game, and has never been on a team that has won a playoff series. Sound familiar? But does 'Melo get booed? Not in Denver, and not in Memphis either. Pau Gasol was booed more than Carmelo Anthony in the Forum.

The attendance this season has been poor, which is understandable - it's a bad team in a rebuilding year. But the poor attendance mixed with the booing makes this a terrible atmosphere for players. And if you don't think that plays a role in whether free agents will come to Memphis, or whether current Grizzlies (like Rudy Gay) will eventually want to re-sign with the team you're crazy.

It's time this came to an end. Pau Gasol and the rest of the Grizzlies deserve better.

GEM MINT TEN!

2007-02-20T09:49:00.000-06:00

I ran across this earlier this morning while surfing the internets. This guy is a legend. A true sports icon. And it's time I gave him his credit on this site.

I used to watch Mr. Don West all the time when I was in college - he was on the legendary Shop at Home Network from, I dunno, like midnight to 4 am. And this guy loves baseball cards. I mean, he LOVES him some baseball cards. Every card was a Gem Mint 10 (whatever that means) or at least a 9 - and every pack was available for such insanely low prices that you would have to have serious brain damage not to order at least 5 at a time. But you had to be patient - 'cause the phone lines WERE ALWAYS JAMMED! You could not get through!

My favorite Don West trait was his tendency to elongate the S at the end of wordsssss. Like thisssssssss. Listen for it in this first video - and enjoy Don getting so excited about the 6400 card deal that he spills everything all over the floor. It's great.

ACTUAL QUOTE 1: "Literally, you can swim in 'em!"

ACTUAL QUOTE 2: "You're getting six thousand four hundred! Ooohh, another Mark McGwire...man I just love this! Oooooo, Joe Montana, ha ha ha ha ha! And there's an old Tommy John! Look at this!"

And then, there's this. Nothing honors the memory of Dale Earnhardt more than buying one of these limited edition jackets.

ACTUAL QUOTE 1: "We got XL. I'm wearing an XL, and, believe me, that's the size you want."

ACTUAL QUOTE 2: "We obviously know that this is a screw up on the price. I'm just giving you warning right now."

ACTUAL QUOTE 3: Don: "This is the coolest jacket of them all." Kenny: "Holy cow. Ho - lee cow." Don: "You better believe this is unbelievable."

Finally, if you spent $4000 on a Tiger Woods Grand Slam Ventures Rookie Card on the advice of Don and Kenny, you are an idiot. But it is a GEM MINT 10 PERFECT ROOKIE! So you've got that going for you. Besides, who doesn't love golf cards?

ACTUAL QUOTE 1: "If you order this, you will be the happiest person on the face of the planet."

ACTUAL QUOTE 2: "To me, this is like buying stock in a biotech company the day before they announce they found a cure for cancer or something."

Thanks to donwest.org and the Youtube people who uploaded this great stuff. I miss Shop at Home.

A Great Idea (via Email)

2007-02-08T11:59:00.000-06:00

Listener/reader Blake emailed me the other day with an idea I think is fantastic. It's a way to combine two of my favorite sports - soccer and college football - into one big concept to improve college football as a whole. I hope you enjoy:

First, I know this is a pipe dream, but it is an enjoyable dream!

As both a college football and soccer fan I have come up with a too brilliant for words idea. Trash the BCS and simply go to a relegation system just like the English Premiership and other leagues around the world! Can't you just see a premier league with about thirty teams, complete with relegation and a short playoff to end the year (Maybe six teams?)?

Then you have three lesser leagues just below that feature smaller or less successful teams like Vandy, Memphis, Notre Dame (note from Peter: that's funny), etc. Can't you just see the yearly frustration of all those golden domer fans as they struggle to make the B-league jump? Or fight relegation to the D-League? Can you imagine the insane blogging we would have? And how cool would it be to see a team like Buffalo dominate the D league for a few years and move up eventually (Wigan style) to the A-league?

To me this makes too much sense and would be way too fun to ignore. Memphis would have something to play for every year: a C-league championship and promotion to B! Even the worst division one team (as it's now defined) can't have any excuse for totally sucking. If you are scraping the bottom of the D league then maybe you just belong in the NAIA or the Women's Professional Football League.

I digress. Again, I know this will never happen because it blows away all the current financial obligations, sacred bowl worship and, most fatal of all, it is too soccer of an idea. How lame.

When I become ruler of the earth this is what is happening to college football.

I'm hoping Blake does become ruler of Earth.

Peter King Hates Prince

2007-02-05T08:46:00.000-06:00

Before I get to my thoughts on the Super Bowl, I just want to pass along briefly my thoughts on Sports Illustrated writer Peter King. He's bad. Real bad, folks. I've written about King before - his obsequiousness with certain players, his self-righteousness with cultural issues ("You're better than that, Reggie Bush!"), and his generally smug style of writing. But reading his Monday Morning QB column this morning, he's got something going on that I don't understand.

Three separate entries in his column:

1. "Prince, Schmince."

2. Sitting next to Rick Reilly in the press section. "You know what I call Prince?'' he said before halftime. "Not 'The Artist Formerly Known as Prince.' But 'The Artist Formerly Known.'''

3. I did not understand the pregame show or the halftime show.

OK. Let's address these one at a time:

1. What does this even mean? Prince, Schmince? Is he just trying to belittle Prince? Outside of the jungle gym in 4th grade, I'm not sure where this insult is considered effective. King, Schming.

2. He hits us with this Reilly "zinger" just a few lines later in the piece. But it makes no sense. Everyone knows Prince. Everyone. Prince stole the show last night - in the rain, he just blew the place apart. Tore it up. He's still world-famous, as evidenced by the fact that he's the halftime entertainment at the SUPER BOWL! Does the NFL typically book no-names? Idiots.

3. How do you not understand the halftime show? I might give you the pregame show - Cirque du Soleil are kind of weird and bizarre, and when they performed at FedExForum at halftime of a Grizzlies game, I was totally lost. So that's fine. But the halftime show was precisely one thing: Prince singing. If you can't understand that, you probably suffered a brain injury. Folks.

Looking through his columns from earlier in the year, he took a shot at Prince a few weeks back: "Good thing the NFL is promoting the Prince Super Bowl appearance so heavily. It would also be a good idea to promote some of his music, because he hasn't had a song any of the human race has heard since, oh, about 1999." Is Peter King on crack? Did the Stones, or McCartney, or any of the other legends at Super Bowl halftime have "recent hits"? No. They are musical icons, jackass.

So, clearly Prince angered Peter King. But how? That's a story I'd love to hear. My guess is that Prince is a Starbucks freak, and stole all the coffee so ol' Pete couldn't get his usual double-mocha half-caf triple-espresso caramel butternut dreamsicle Colombian rustic blend that we all love reading about. Or else he insulted Brett Favre. One of the two.

In fact, we're gonna play a fun game - I call it "Did Peter King Actually Write This?" I'll put statements below, and you have to figure out which are from King's Monday Morning QB columns, and which are idiotic phrases I just made up. Ready? Here we go:

1. Good for Kimmie Meissner and Emily Hughes finishing 1-2, respectively, in the skating Nationals. Two beautiful skaters, and good kids, apparently, with their scholastic heads on straight.

2. Second in the MVP voting, first in the all-pro voting at quarterback, and he picks up dog doo. That's what I call a heck of an American.

3. Uh-oh. Jim Mora, semi-jokingly, I believe, is not pleased I reported in this column that I skunked him in ping pong 21-15 on Jan. 6. I know Mora, and I'm betting the next time we meet on the table of doom he'll leave his blood on it trying to get even.

4. But I worry about NHL crowds.

5. You see so much on Amtrak. The sights, yes. The country, yes. But did you know that halfway between Wilmington and Philadelphia, a couple hundred feet off the east side of the tracks, there's a Port-a-John graveyard? That's right. Hundreds of decrepit portable toilets. What a view.

6. If you've never played hopscotch with former Seahawks coach Tom Flores, you haven't lived. Flores lives for the game, folks. But not football. Hopscotch.

7. While covering the Pats game in San Diego, I stayed in a hotel that didn't have the Food Network. No Food Network? I can't imagine living without Molto Mario.

8. I owe you a dollar, Rich McKay.

9. Bring back my copy of "Mannequin 2", Rich Kotite.

10. I'm in the middle of John Grisham's nonfiction book about two murders in Ada, Okla. It's really good. Wish I had time to read it.

11. Coffeenerdness: Not sure if this man ran on the Espresso Ticket, but Bob Goodlatte ran unopposed and won a House seat in the 6th District of Virginia Tuesday night. I'd have thought Fred Finefrappucino would have made a swell opponent.

12. Watched "American Idol" for the first time last week. And I just got sick of the ridiculing and the mocking of the contestants. You're better than that, Simon Cowell.

13. When did it become acceptable in this country to not wear deodorant?

14. I think when all is said and done, no movie role will have a bigger impact in this nation's history than Eddie Murphy as Norbit.

Answers below:
(1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 8, 10, 11 are King's lunacy.)

SUPER BOWL THOUGHTS

This game was always going to be about Peyton Manning more than anyone else. And indeed it was - Peyton was the game's MVP, though either Joseph Addai, Dominic Rhodes, or the entire offensive line deserved it more than he did. The Colts exploted a tired Bears defense and just ran it down their throats. It was a smart gameplan. Apart from his first four throws, Manning was solid if unspectacular. He did exactly what he needed to do. The Colts defense continued its inspired playoff performance, though - the Bears were shut down except for Thomas Jones' big 52-yard run in the 2nd quarter.

And Rex Grossman was terrible, but you knew that was bound to happen. He's young, and he'll likely be much better down the line, but right now, he's just incredibly inconsistent. The Bears had opportunities to win that game, but Grossman threw some bad balls and at one point channeled Casey Clausen circa 2002 as he could not handle a snap.

You can't dislike Tony Dungy. A truly classy man winning a deserved title is always nice to see.

Real Super Bowl Predictions

2007-01-31T11:48:00.000-06:00

No way I can compete with the master.

There's A Lot Wrong With This Picture

2007-01-26T11:55:00.001-06:00

Three Stories

2007-01-26T08:42:00.000-06:00

Story 1: David Beckham Has Too Much Money (from the San Francisco Chronicle):

English soccer ace David Beckham has spent a staggering $1.8 million on the world's most expensive sex toy as a present for his pregnant wife Victoria.

The platinum vibrator, with a 10-carat diamond encrusted base linked to a 16-carat diamond necklace, is one of only 10 in the world -- and was created by London strip-club owner Peter Stringfellow.

Stringfellow reveals Rolling Stone veteran Mick Jagger is also keen to purchase one of the buzzing toys for his girlfriend L'Wren Scott.

Story 2: Gilbert Arenas is Great (from Gilbert's Blog):

D'Antoni said that after I scored 54 on them and made my prediction to score 50 on the Blazers that he'd like to see what I'm going to do against Duke.

I thought it was funny because if I have the chance to go back to college, I’ll give up one NBA season to play against Duke.

One college game…that’s five fouls, right?...40-minute game…at Duke, they got soft rims…I’d probably score 84 or 85.

I wouldn’t pass the ball.

I wouldn’t even think about passing it. It would be like a NBA Live or an NBA 2K7 game, you just shoot with one person.

Please, please let this happen. Just look the other way this one time, NCAA. Please let Gilbert Arenas embarrass Coach K.

Story 3: The Beer Pipeline (from the Moscow Times):

The idea came to St. Petersburg Deputy Governor Alexander Vakhmistrov after he had knocked back a few malted beverages.

Vakhmistrov, who heads up construction in the northern capital, was on hand in Germany recently to watch a football game between two teams sponsored by state natural gas monopoly Gazprom: Zenit from St. Petersburg and the German club Schalke 04.

"At the end of the game, an amusing statistic appeared on the scoreboard: '61,700 people are in attendance, and 44,000 liters of beer have been drunk,'" Vakhmistrov told reporters Wednesday.

Impressed, Vakhmistrov and Zenit president Sergei Fursenko concluded that the Russian club's new stadium should be equipped with a "beer pipeline" like the one at Schalke's Veltins Arena in Gelsenkirchen, which features a five-kilometer pipeline that supplies suds to dozens of restaurants, cafes and snack shops.

"Fursenko and I decided that they can do what they want with the field, the goals and the stands, but we've got to have such a beer pipeline," he told the newspaper Delovoi Peterburg in an interview published Thursday.

Vakhmistrov said the pipeline at Zenit's new $250 million stadium, which is being built on the site of the old Kirovsky stadium on Krestovsky Island, will pump beer to VIP boxes and cafes in the stadium from 1,000-liter kegs.

"They don't bring trucks full of bottles, cans and other packaging into [Veltsin's Arena] anymore," Vakhmistrov said, Delovoi Peterburg reported. "I saw it myself and even drank this beer, as it was a weekend and I could take the liberty."

When upgtading the Liberty Bowl - or building a new stadium - let's leave room in the budget for the Beer Pipeline.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I Give You Sir Paul McCartney Making Mashed Potatoes

2007-01-25T12:42:00.001-06:00

Did Chucky Atkins Put in a Trade Request Too?

2007-01-25T10:51:00.000-06:00

Just asking.

What a surprising win last night. A pat on the back to the players who sucked it up and performed in the face of a lot of distractions. Pau Gasol recorded a triple-double, and yet it was Chucky Atkins who dropped a near-miraculous 29 and 15 assists on Utah after playing extended minutes following Damon Stoudamire's back spasms. Oh, and Eddie Jones turning back the clock for a rare (final?) great Grizzlies performance that was sealed by hitting the game-winning jumper. Lots of interesting subplots.

No, they couldn't stop Carlos Boozer (18-24 from the field, 39 pts, 15 reb), and yes, the Jazz shot well over 50 percent, and yes, the Jazz outrebounded the Grizzlies by 21, but the win still counts.

One downer: if the Grizzlies were trying (as the rumor holds) to shop Brian Cardinal by putting him in the starting lineup for more exposure, they may want to try a different approach. I don't think I've ever seen a starter play just 2 minutes, get pulled (in a non-injury scenario), then never return. Bravo. I'm guessing that won't increase his trade value.

You Might Think This Is Boring, But It's Not

2007-01-25T10:27:00.000-06:00

As with the show, from time to time I'll post things that aren't sports related. If you're only here for sports, feel free to skip over this post.

This is an amazing 1987 PBS documentary from Bill Moyers about the history of United States covert operations in the name of national security. It's long (96 minutes), but fascinating. Though it's 20 years old, it still retains a great deal of importance and relevance today.

WARNING: The Jackson Browne song at the beginning is terrible. Don't let that stop you from watching the rest of the film.

Monday Thoughts

2007-01-22T08:55:00.000-06:00

It's hard not to be happy for Peyton Manning today. He played like Tom Brady in the 2nd half of last night's game. The Colts scored 32 points in the second half -- four touchdowns and a FG (and one two-point conversion). That's a remarkable outburst against a team known for its stiff defense and opportunistic play. It was ironic that Tom Brady threw the final pick that sealed the game for the Colts -- a true role-reversal took place in the second half. Manning was Brady, and the Colts were the Patriots.

Manning was outstanding, but so too was Dallas Clark. Clark took full advantage of the weak Patriot linebacking and safety corps for 134 yards, including a huge 52 yard catch late in the ballgame. Harrison and Wayne were ordinary, but Clark was immense.

The Patriots cost-cutting at WR finally came back to haunt them as Reche Caldwell had a BRUTAL second half. Most embarrassing was the play in which he was left completely, totally uncovered, then dropped the ball with no one around him. You'd think with eyes as big as his, he'd be able to see the ball. He straps two tires together to use as glasses.

On the other side, the Bears' defense was opportunistic yet again. Not spectacular, but they were very aggressive and took advantage of a careless Saints team. When it was 16-14 Bears, and the Saints had the ball and were driving in the 3rd quarter, the Saints lost all the momentum. They got nothing out of a drive that looked to merit them at least a field goal (and the lead in the game). After that FG miss, the Bears got a ridiculous safety from Drew Brees, a great drive out of Rex Grossman (who still looks out of his league at times), and a trifecta (sack, forced fumble, fumble recovery) from Wally Ogunleye, and that was that.

Early line is Colts -7. Seems about right to me. Rex Grossman still isn't very good. However, Thomas Jones and Cedric Benson ran very well in the NFC Championship game and face a potentially porous Colt rush D. But Manning will play this one without the pressure we've seen in the postseason so far -- he's got the monkey off his back -- and the Colts will score a lot of points.

Ron Tillery confirmed the Pau Gasol trade request this morning. Here are the salient quotes from today's Commercial Appeal:

Grizzlies center Pau Gasol won't say as much but his actions and agent have delivered the message.
The 7-footer wants out of Memphis.

Pronto.
Given Gasol's play and the feelers his agent, Arn Tellem, have lobbed around the NBA recently, the Grizzlies are suddenly forced to consider their future without someone they've deemed the franchise player.
Gasol made trade overtures before and after Mike Fratello was fired, according to team insiders. The Spaniard dodged the question when asked Sunday if he's demanded a trade at any point this season.
"I don't want to comment on that right now because I don't want it to be a distraction to me or the team," Gasol said. "It's not beneficial to anybody. Whatever happens is yet to be seen."

Yeah, uh, about that distraction thing. Too late, big boy. Jerry West is quoted as saying that Pau is tradeable, but he won't be given away. Michael Heisley agrees. Good. Fine. The problem with this whole scenario is that the minute a trade request becomes public, the value of a player drops. Interested teams know that the Grizzlies are being more or less forced to seriously shop Pau Gasol, and in that situation, the Grizzlies are on the defensive.

Pau's being ridiculous, by the way. Not that you need me to say that. I've always been one of Pau's biggest supporters, but his play this year has been indefensible. This franchise traded away Shareef Abdur-Rahim, a sure 20/10 guy at that time, to get a chance at Pau Gasol. This franchise traded away player after player (Bonzi, J-Will, Posey) that didn't believe in Pau as the nuclues of the team. This franchise sacrificed its commercial leader and public face (Shane Battier) to take a chance on a second star to pair alongside Pau. This franchise maxed out Pau contractually when many people said it was too much money. This franchise publicly supported Pau during his rehab. This franchise didn't stand in his way when he wanted to fulfill his dream and win a World Championship with Spain. After all of that, Pau wants out. Brilliant.

I'll say this -- if he's not traded by Saturday, his reception at the Forum should be interesting. And by interesting, I mean, "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! GO TO HELL!!! YOU SUCK!!! GO BACK TO SPAIN!!!" And so on. It's not like Pau has been Señor Memphis to begin with. In the best of times, he's likely to be booed after a few bad plays. Now, he's Most Hated Numero Uno.

Potential deals:

1. Chicago sends Luol Deng, Ben Gordon, and P.J. Brown for Pau Gasol.

As I wrote yesterday, this is apparently close to an actual starting point in negotiations between Chicago and Memphis. This would be a good return for Pau, although I'm not as wild about Deng as some people are. Brown's 8.5 million dollar expiring would be nice, as well. I'd like to add Brian Cardinal's deal to this trade (it would still work under the salary cap that way). Chicago might ask for a bit more in the deal since Cardinal's deal is so bad, but that would certainly be worth it.

2. Utah sends Andrei Kirilenko and Gordan Giricek for Pau/Cardinal.

This is where we get into the realm of the theoretical. Utah isn't happy with Kirilenko's effort and performance this season (see Jazz owner Larry Miller ripping AK47 in this Salt Lake Tribune article) and Pau would fit in beautifully alongside Carlos Boozer. Kirilenko is a big-time player, no doubt, and while his numbers aren't good this year, he's capable of putting up 5X5's every night (5X5's are stat lines with at least 5 points, rebounds, assists, steals, and blocks). Not many can do that. Giricek is in just to balance out the salaries.

3. Boston sends Gerald Green, Al Jefferson, and Theo Ratliff for Gasol/Cardinal.

This deal would be a big, big risk. Pau may be a girl, but he's a productive NBA player. Green and Jefferson could turn into two very good players -- Jefferson is already a very solid rebounder, and Green has shown flashes of brilliance. Ratliff would be Eddie Jones in this deal...a mostly useless veteran whose contract expires after two seasons.

4. L.A. Lakers send Andrew Bynum, Vladimir Radmanovic, Chris Mihm, Shammond Williams, and Maurice Evans for Gasol/Cardinal.

Tyler likes this move. Obviously you get Bynum and a whole lot of crap back, but if Bynum turns into a huge megastar, this is a win. What if you were to do this deal and when get the first overall pick? Do you still draft Oden?

5. Toronto sends Chris Bosh for Pau.

My dream move. Please let Pau play with his Spanish teammates Calderon and Garbajosa.

Bill Parcells is retiring. Probably should have happened after last year. He's a legend, without question, but like Joe Gibbs, his time is up. Could Nick Saban pull a Franchione on Alabama? Please, Jerry Jones, offer him a jillion dollars -- let's see what happens.

RIP Bam Bam Bigelow. Here's Bam Bam in action against legendary grappler Barry Horowitz.

Is Vecsey Right...For Once?

2007-01-21T15:14:00.000-06:00

Once again, New York Post writer Peter Vecsey has weighed in on the Grizzlies - the only person writing more on the Griz in a paper is my radio partner Ron Tillery. Most of the time, I tend to dismiss Vecsey's writing pretty quickly. However, today's piece has an air of truth about it:

"Sources throughout the NBA disclose the 7-foot Gasol, an elite post-up performer, as tough a cover as there is within 15 feet of the rim, suddenly is eminently obtainable. Distressed at management's rebuilding-with-adolescence mood, the 27 1/2-year-old has asked to be traded to a playoff-positioned ensemble that, of course, would be instantly transformed into a legit title contender.

The offended Grizzlies aim to oblige.

I put this out there with utter certainty. Infallible informers report Grizzlies president Jerry West has explored prospective trade arrangements with at least three teams regarding Gasol. In order to protect my sources, the only one I'm willing to identify for the time being is the Bulls."

No more weird Pau faces in Memphis?

Is this true? Though he's been wrong several times before, Vecsey's pretty sure of himself on this one. I'm inclined to think that something along these lines has gone on - Pau's clearly not happy at all with the direction of the team, and while he and his family have grown to like Memphis, I'd imagine he wouldn't be upset with a move to a more Spanish-speaking, bigger town (like Chicago, for example).

Along those same lines, management isn't thrilled at all with Pau's effort level since coming back. Defensively, he's worse than before because he's just not trying. Offensively, he's shooting well enough, but he's not aggressive in making moves to the basket, and he's relying more on cutesy-poo lay-ins and longish jumpers than normal. Jerry West and Tony Barone have asked Pau to play with fire and passion for Memphis, not just for Spain. It hasn't worked. He's not leading the team, he's not doing the little things (or the big things) you need an All-Star to do for your team when they're struggling, he's just lifeless -- and it's contagious.

Pau rushed back from rehab to find a total disaster where a good team once stood. He's made it clear -- in Spain, at least -- that he wants to win a championship soon, and he has to be able to see that a championship in Memphis isn't happening in the next 3-4 years. It stands to reason he might want out.

So, let's say there is truth to this inflammatory report. What would the Grizzlies get in return? Vecsey speculates:

The Bulls also own what Memphis wants, namely Luol Deng ($2.6 million) and Ben Gordon ($3.86M). In order to satisfy salary/transaction specs, Chicago would have to include P.J. Brown ($8.56M). I'm told the Grizzlies are prepared to add Hakim Warrick ($1.2M) to a pot that so far does not include draft picks; Gasol currently is on the books for $12.8M and is owed $63M over the next four seasons.

So, Gasol for Deng/Gordon/P.J. Brown? The Bulls are very high on Luol Deng and especially Ben Gordon - Gordon is a fantastic scorer and a game-changer. He tore up the Grizzlies last Saturday as a starter, but he's normally a 6th-man who can energize a team. Deng is a great defender who's still got work to do offensively. If I trade Gasol, I'd want the Knicks 1st round draft pick for next year that Chicago has the rights to. Brown/Gordon/2007 Knicks 1st for Gasol would have to be tempting for Jerry West. You get what will likely be a lottery pick in a very deep draft, you get Brown's 8+ million off the cap at season's end, and you get a scoring machine in Gordon. I'd rather have that pick than Luol Deng.

I've long said that there aren't many guys in the league I'd trade Pau for, and that is still true. The deal above is not one I'm overly fond of, but it's not bad if you are resigned to trading Pau. I'd love to get Chris Bosh from Toronto for Pau (as I tell Ron over and over again), or a similar young superstar. Maybe that's possible. But if an unmotivated and passionless Pau continues to sleepwalk his way through this season, his value is only going to drop.

Any ideas on trading Pau that actually work? Use ESPN's trade machine (I've helpfully added a link to on the right) and find trades that would work. Email them to me or leave them in the comments.

I Want That TV - NFL Picks Edition

2007-01-19T11:16:00.000-06:00

Tyler, be sure to forward this to the Rainman, cause I want to win that TV he's giving away. Apparently no one else wants it, so I do. Someone jump in here while I'm doing these picks.

New Orleans at Chicago

Grossman is due to suck and Deggie McBushister will run wild.

New Orleans 27 Chicago 21

New England at Indianapolis

If Peyton Manning can't win this one, he's never getting to the Super Bowl.

Indianapolis 28 New England 17

Gator Stomp?

2007-01-19T08:04:00.000-06:00

If you know me, you know I can't stand Florida. I went to Tennessee, for crying out loud -- I can't very well do anything other than hate Florida. However, I have a great deal of respect for the way they put their alligator shoes directly up some Buckeye tail in the BCS National Championship game a couple of weeks ago.

There was something that appears to have been overlooked, though. Watch this video and see Ohio State linebacker Curtis Terry put on an off-Broadway performance of Stomp directly on Tim Tebow's head. In addition to the stomps, Terry also appears to throw two vicious punches at Tebow after Tebow was tackled.

If Marcus Vick was ripped for stamping on Louisville DE Elvis Dumervil's calf in last year's Gator Bowl and if Albert Haynesworth was severely punished for stepping on Cowboy center Andre Gerode's face, why hasn't anyone said anything about this?

There's a Lot Wrong With This Picture

2007-01-18T12:09:00.000-06:00

Fighting Like Gentlemen

2007-01-18T09:20:00.000-06:00

This is a fight between Phoenix Coyote Georges Laraque and L.A. King Raitis Ivanans last November. Nothing terribly special, until you get to the part when they play the audio from Laraque, who was miked up for the game. He couldn't be more polite about the whole thing. His demeanor is more reminiscent of a guy who's asking his buddy to play golf than a guy who's about to fight in the middle of the rink.

"You want to? OK. Good luck, man."

I mean, that's all well and good, but if you want to learn what to say before a fight, watch this video -- the king of insane prefight rants, the Ultimate Warrior, is about to give you chumps a lesson in how to psyche out your opponent! Remember, load the spaceship with the rocket fuel! Dig your claws into my organs! I'll break down the cockpit door, Hulk Hogan!

Special bonus slapfight -- this is funny and embarrassing. Diogo and Luis Fabiano fighting in La Liga. High comedy, low skill.

Heads Up and Other Randomness

2007-01-17T12:13:00.000-06:00

From the Portland, OR area yesterday...are these people really that stupid?

This is some Japanese Nintendo commercial from way back...Japanese commercials always raise many questions. Why are this father and daughter so angry? Is it because they suck at Super Mario Brothers and Zelda? Is it because this commercial is so weird? Where can I get one of those shirts they're wearing?

The Return of the BPR!

2007-01-16T11:19:00.000-06:00

My producer, Tyler McLellan, is something of a Renaissance man. Not only can he work his magic in putting the show together every morning, not only can he orchestrate the chaos that is the Rainman's 13,000 contests on the Southern Sports Report every afternoon, not only can he blow up callers at will, but he can also write quite well.

He also happens to be a breakfast connoisseur. His outstanding writing and his love of breakfast happen to collide in a beautiful way right here on this space to create the legendary Breakfast Power Rankings! If you are looking for breakfast, and you want the very best there is to offer, consult the BPR. Much like the BCS, this will likely cause argument and controversy, but all decisions are final and binding. Without further ado, I hand this post over to Tyler:

BPR (January edition):

(1) McDonald's Biscuit
I believe McDonald's only refers to this as just a regular 'biscuit', but hardcore fans of Mickey D's call it the 'butter biscuit' because of the buttery bliss embedded in each delicious bite. With McDonalds' grape jam (not jelly) in the middle, this is an untoppable yet wonderfully simple breakfast treat.

(2) Eggo's Waffles (Homestyle, Buttermilk or Blueberry)
The only waffles of any kind that I have ever liked. Oh, and they must be microwaved, because crunchy waffles just don't make sense to me. In fact, the Waffle House's waffles are tolerable because they don't toast them to a crisp, but they still have NOTHING on good ol' Eggos. Even the brand name looks (especially the way it's written on the box) and sounds scrumptious, doesn't it? EGGO. Yum. I eat these 8-10 at a time, no problem. By the way, I've been eating these for years and have never been able to tell the difference between Homestyle and Buttermilk...and that's without syrup.

(3) Bisquik Shake 'n Pour Pancakes
Finally, making REAL pancakes is easy. Let's face it, there has never, EVER been any microwavable pancakes that were edible. They are all poor excuses for pancakes. They are, in fact, the poor man's McDonald's Hotcakes, which are good in their own right but they aren't real pancakes. Grab two of these (regular size) at Wal-Mart and enjoy roughly 16 good-sized, genuine pancakes for the whole family. The only reason this isn't at 1 or 2 is because it still takes considerable time to make all the pancakes, but it is well worth it. Bite-for-bite it is the best.

(4) Aunt Jemima's French Toast Sandwiches
Much like pancakes, there aren't any good microwavable versions of french toast. You just can't replicate what the two best breakfast foods ever are supposed to taste like. However, these sandwiches (from All-Time syrup champion Jemima) are as close to it as it gets. As a bonus, you get sausage, egg and cheese too. Two come in each box, but one is often enough to get you through the morning which earns this entry bonus points.

(5) Burger King's Chicken Biscuit
Sorry, Chik-Fil-A fans, BK has the superior chicken biscuit. Hard to believe? Maybe, but if you did a Pepsi Challenge-style contest between the two, removing all name-induced bias, BK would emerge as victor. Grape jelly and coffee/Coke are required, because without jelly (or jam) it is too dry and without something to drink you will get cotton mouth.

Others receiving votes:

McDonald's Bacon Egg and Cheese - former top 5 has fallen out of favor as the Egg in this combination is increasingly bland and rather tasteless
Toaster Strudles - just not enough content...too small and too quickly eaten.
McDonald's McGriddle (any) - too trendy and streaky to qualify as a breakfast mainstay
Burger King Breakfast Burrito - closest thing we'll get to the greatness of a Whataburger Taquito here in Memphis. If eligible, the Whataburger Taquito would be a lock for the top five...
McDonald's Steak Egg and Cheese - truly a one-hit wonder, as I've had it twice: first time it was phenomenal, I thought we had a top 3 pick in my hands, second time...not so much.
Pop Tarts - does anyone really consider these breakfast food any more? Too snack-like...

All-Time Champion: My mother's french toast
I don't know how she did it, but my mom never failed to make the best french toast ever whenever she decided to. I think I made one feeble attempt myself to duplicate the egg-soaked soggy cinnamony greatness, but it was a poor imitation. I haven't had her french toast in a couple of years, but that was a special request and you can bet the next time we go visit I will negotiate beforehand that her french toast will be prepared the morning after we arrive.

BONUS Coffee Power Rankings (Restaurant Edition)

(1) Waffle House
I can't believe I don't actually buy the brew-it-yourself bags when we go there, I always forget.

(2) CK's Coffee Shop
I don't know how, but they use various brand names and I still can't brew it nearly as well as they do at home...must be the makers.

(3) IHOP
Solid and reliable, but simply not spectacular. I have one cup and I'm fine...at Waffle House or CK's, I need at least two cups.

(4) McDonald's
Still the cream of the fast-food crop, and now they offer to do the cream and sugar for you??? That always held it back to me, but I haven't yet been able to take advantage of this new feature that could move them into the top two next time I go.

(5) Perkins
Sometimes I don't even finish one cup there--not a good sign.

NFL and Whatnot

2007-01-16T08:53:00.000-06:00

After two rounds of Exciting NFL Playoff Action (tm), we're down to four remaining teams. In the NFC, it's Chicago hosting New Orleans. In the AFC, Indy welcomes New England to town. I'll get to that in a second.

First, a word about the presentation of the NFL. I'm keenly aware (thanks to the NFL's continual reminders) that football is America's top sport, and the NFL is king of all the professional sports. No problem. I love the NFL, too. But honestly, it is hard for me to watch an entire NFL playoff game because of the constant, never-ending stream of advertising and promotion. I mean, it is CONSTANT. Here's the breakdown:

1. Normal Ads - These are 30 seconds each and usually involve Peyton Manning. Whether he's emerging from a primordial-ooze-covered football to get me to buy Gatorade, or being goofy to get me to subscribe to DirecTV, or being goofier to get me to use MasterCard, or wearing a fake mustache goofily to get me to use Sprint, Peyton really, really wants me to buy something. If it doesn't involve Peyton, it's usually a beer commercial whereby guys do stupid things ('cause we're guys!). Or it could be a truck commercial where people pile up random crap in a truck bed, or drive the truck over insanely crazy elements, or have the truck be eaten by a monster, then somehow be drivable moments later. Or it could be that weird Jared/Michael Strahan commercial where they seem a bit too happy to be losing weight together. There are usually at least 800 of these in a broadcast.

2. Billboards - These are the things that come on as the broadcast comes back from commercial. The music is playing, there are images of the city the game is being played in, and then the announcer's voice says, "The NFL on CBS. Brought to you byyyy...Budweiser. Smooth, refreshing, the King of Beers. Budweiser -- it only tastes bad 'til you're drunk. And byyyyy...AIG. AIG. You don't know what we do and we don't either. But, still, AIG. And by...Sony/Paramount Pictures "Corky Romano 2" starring Chris Kattan, in theatres now." There are too many of these, too.

3. Sponsored Elements - If all that wasn't enough corporate bombardment, then you deal with the sponsored elements. The Subway Eat Fresh Play of the Game. The Powerade Powerful Block of the Game. The Master Lock Keys to Victory. The Preparation H Plan of Attack. The Imodium AD Run of the Game. It's ridiculous. It drives me crazy.

In between all of that, there is an actual football contest being played. Supposedly. I am happy to see that the AFC title game is going to be one of great drama -- and this has to be the chance for Pitch King Peyton to finally shed some of the labels that have dogged him for his entire career. Can't beat New England in the postseason? Now he's got them at home for the first time. Can't overcome a bad defense to win? The Colts' D has been outstanding in the postseason.

If Peyton and the Colts are going to win, Marvin Harrison simply has to be better. It boggles my mind how Marvin Harrison has managed to avoid the choker label while Peyton Manning has been saddled with it for years. Look at Harrison's postseason numbers (courtesy Pro Football Reference):

 Year  Opp   Result  |  RSH    YD  TD  |  REC    YD  TD
---------------------+-----------------+-----------------
1996  pit  L,14-42  |    0     0   0  |    3    71   0
1999  ten  L,16-19  |    0     0   0  |    5    65   0
2000  mia  L,17-23  |    0     0   0  |    5    63   0
2002  nyj  L,0-41   |    0     0   0  |    4    47   0
2003  den  W,41-10  |    0     0   0  |    7   133   2
2003  kan  W,38-31  |    0     0   0  |    6    98   0
2003  nwe  L,14-24  |    0     0   0  |    3    19   0
2004  den  W,49-24  |    0     0   0  |    4    50   0
2004  nwe  L,3-20   |    0     0   0  |    5    44   0
2005  pit  L,18-21  |    0     0   0  |    3    52   0
2006  kan  W,23-8   |    0     0   0  |    2    48   0
2006  bal  W,15-6   |    0     0   0  |    4    45   0
---------------------+-----------------+-----------------
TOTAL                |    0     0   0  |   51   735   2

He's only caught two touchdowns in his entire postseason career. In only one postseason game has he had over 100 yards receiving. Both of those events happened in the same game -- the 2003 Wild Card game against Denver. I'm aware that Manning's struggles will inevitably rub off on Marvin Harrison. But isn't it possible that Harrison's struggles have rubbed off on Manning? Either way, this extraordinary tandem can shake off a lot of haters with a win on Sunday.

Tony Dungy can, too.

In the NFC, somehow 1 vs. 2 is Chicago hosting New Orleans. I know I had that matchup nailed before the season started. At least the Saints are easy to root for. It was a pleasure to watch Deuce McCallister run with such abandon, and he's clearly been overlooked in the rush to anoint Reggie Bush as The Most Exciting Player in Football. Yet when the chips were down, it was Deuce who had the monster game against Philly. After all he's personally done to aid the victims of Hurricane Katrina and it's aftermath, McCallister deserves success. I suspect he and Bush will gash the Bears defense, which looked very porous against Shaun Alexander in the Divisional round.

Rex Grossman wasn't bad against Seattle, which means he's due for a stinkbomb against New Orleans. I see the Saints winning this one and moving on to the Super Bowl. They'll play Indianapolis, who will finally take out a Patriots team that has been wobbling for weeks, but hasn't fallen. They'll fall on Sunday. If Marty Schottenheimer hadn't Martyed it up in San Diego, the Patriots would have been out last week.

Allow me to finalize this with a Newcastle update. 3-2 winners at Tottenham to move to 11th in the Premiership table. The second equalizer -- courtesy of my main man Obafemi Martins -- was an absolute thunderbolt. Enjoy.

Returning Thoughts

2007-01-15T12:06:00.000-06:00

As you may be able to tell, I've changed a few things up around here. Most notably, you'll find these are new words you're reading. Outstanding though my analysis of the Grizzlies/Knicks opener was (and it was outstanding indeed), I suspect you may want some new words at the top of the blog. Well, I shall fulfill that desire.

First things first. Irrespective of Eli Savoie's, Rob Fischer's, or Ron Tillery's opinions of the Grizzlies' situation, here are my thoughts. This situation has been mishandled from the very beginning. All things being equal, Mike Fratello should never have begun this season as Grizzlies head coach, since the desire to play entertaining, uptempo basketball apparently outweighed everything else. Fratello is incapable of coaching in that style. It is like asking water to be dry. Can't happen. Even when Fratello was in Atlanta and scoring a lot of points, his style wasn't particularly uptempo considering the era. Everyone was runnin' and gunnin' in the 80's, baby!

So a young coach -- your Iavaroni-type -- should have been in place to start the season. But Michael Heisley chose to remain loyal to Fratello because of his regular season success, which is hard to dispute. The Brian Davis fiasco didn't help either, as the team was handcuffed in making moves that would cause any significant addition to payroll (hiring a new coach while paying Fratello's contract would certainly qualify). Thus, Fratello stayed.

As is his wont, Fratello tried to win in his way -- even though Pau Gasol was out of action. It was a dismal failure. Though the team fought hard for the first month or so and dealt with a brutally difficult schedule, the record was terrible. Towards the end of December, the team just quit on Mike Fratello. Just like they had quit on Hubie Brown. Just like they had quit on Sidney Lowe.

And that's where the real problems start.

Though the players cannot be excused for quitting and being less than professional, I think the problem goes beyond the locker room. It goes beyond the coaches office. Think about it: the players have changed, yet three separate coaches have been quit on. What hasn't changed? Upper management. Stability in a franchise flows from the top -- and the top of this franchise is wishy-washy and unsettled. Therefore, the players are too.

The Grizzlies decided to move Director of Player Personnel Tony Barone, Sr. into their interim head coaching slot for the remainder of the season. I have nothing but good things to say about Tony Barone on a personal level. He is a very friendly guy who has an engaging personality and is a lot of fun to be around. All of my interactions with him have been positive.

However, to insinuate, as Geoff Calkins did in a pair of columns and many TV/radio pundits have done in their reports, that he was the obvious choice is lunacy. And make no mistake -- that was the tone. Here's the quote from Geoff's column: "Barone was just the obvious guy for an extraordinarily hard job." So there you go. The obvious guy would have been Lionel Hollins, the lead assistant for many years who, by the way, has actually coached in the NBA before and who has been in every practice since the beginning or training camp. Or, failing that, maybe Mitchell Anderson, who has coached the Grizzlies summer league teams the past couple of years. Or maybe Rick Adelman, who has an extensive resume and an ability to communicate with fractured teams (he won with J-Will AND Chris Webber...together). Any of those would have been an obvious guy.

Barone wasn't. Which isn't bad in and of itself, it's just true. If I were a member of the current coaching staff, I would feel a bit slighted that I was overlooked for this position. Even if it is just to babysit for the rest of the season, it is still a job that could certainly be done by one of them. Maybe they wouldn't have just rolled the ball out to halfcourt and let the players run up and down without discipline, but haven't we seen after this weekend that the undisciplined running approach isn't the magic formula some may have thought? Plus, those coaches have all been in the locker room, on the plane, and in practice all season long -- Barone wasn't. That wasn't his job. He was scouting.

Anyway, that train has left the station. Tony Barone, Sr. is the coach. He made it abundantly clear that he was going to run, run, run 'til the players dropped, and offense was going to be the order of the day in Memphis. On the surface, everything appeared great -- it's uptempo, it's not Fratello, it's run n' gun! Look out! It was like Halloween when you were a kid -- candy, candy, candy! Remember? You ate all that candy and it was so sweet and delicious...if some is good, more is better. So you kept on eating.

Until you got sick.

Right now, the Grizzlies are sick. They had their sugar rush of undisciplined offense, but they're now coming down off that high and it is ugly. Unfortunately, the reality of their new style is that it has to this point involved no defensive effort. Tony Barone knows this and has said as much, going so far as to bench Pau Gasol and Rudy Gay during Friday's game due to lackluster effort. And that's all that I had been saying on the issue from the get go. After the Grizzlies beat the lakers last Tuesday, I said, "If they play defense with that kind of effort, then I have no problem with this new style." They haven't, so I do.

Here's the facts: teams are averaging 117 points per game against the new-look Grizzlies. That's insane. Six of the eight games have been at home. Also, each team the Grizzlies have played under the new regine, with the exception of Minnesota, have been without at least one of their top three guys.

Toronto: missing Chris Bosh and T.J. Ford
Houston: missing Yao Ming
Golden State: missing Jason Richardson and Monta Ellis
Boston: missing Paul Pierce
San Antonio: missing Tony Parker
Los Angeles: missing Lamar Odom
Chicago: missing Ben Wallace and Andres Nocioni

Despite that, the Grizzlies are still allowing mind-numbingly huge amounts of points, partly because the tempo has increased and everyone is scoring more, but mostly because the defensive effort has disappeared. Jump shots are largely uncontested, penetration is commonplace, and interior defense (excluding Alexander Johnson) has been porous. As Eli Savoie pointed out, typically teams choose to play an uptempo style because they have more athletic and more skilled players (like Phoenix). Those teams know that the more possessions there are in a game, the more likely their talent will overcome mistakes. The Grizzlies lack that talent. Maybe Fratello knew what he was doing when he slowed this team down?

I know, I'm a hater and too negative. That's simply not the case. I just refuse to be blinded by offensive flash and sizzle. There's not one team in the NBA that has ever won consistently without playing at least a little defense. And yes, I want this team to win. This year, next year, whenever. It is better for this city, and for me professionally, if this team wins. Losing sucks. Losing is no fun. Watching a performance like the one in Chicago on Saturday night kills a fanbase.

Let's take stock of where we are. Pau Gasol, the Grizzlies' superstar, was quoted on Saturday thusly: "The deal is we don't know what the heck we're doing. A lot of guys are lost. We take too many bad shots. We have to play together." We don't know what the heck we're doing? Pau was clearly angry and frustrated after being benched against Minnesota, and now he's clearly angry, frustrated, and lost. He appears to be disconnected from this team. In addition, Rudy Gay is totally lost on offense and defense, and is making it hard for Barone to play him. His minutes have not exactly skyrocketed under Barone, despite claims that Gay would play until he was exhausted.

Rudy Gay's Average Minutes Per Game:

In Mike Fratello's Last 8 Games: 19.1
In Tony Barone, Sr.'s First 8 Games: 24.0

Quite a jump. Rudy's just not getting it at this point. He's still got a long way to go, and will likely get much better as time progresses, but early indicators aren't too good on Gay. Hakim Warrick is an afterthought and there have to be serious doubts about whether he and Pau can play together. Neither can play much defense and they're pretty redundant -- only Pau is much better. Alexander Johnson looks very good so far -- a steal at the 40th spot -- but you can't keep him and Lawrence Roberts. They're essentially the same guy. Will the team resign Dahntay Jones? Good defender most of the time, but the offense is very suspect.

And that brings me to my point. I'm very sorry to those of you who were turned off by my insistence on observing reality. I know it's not as much fun. I'd rather eat candy all day, too. Candy is more fun than vegetables. But as sweet as it is, you won't grow stronger and better by only eating candy. In fact, you'll get sick.

Do you really think if this continues that people will continue to be mesmerized by the fact that the scoreboard now says 110 under Grizzlies rather than 80? I don't. Not if Memphis is the basketball-savvy town everyone has always said it is. The Grizzlies have still not addressed the key issues that face them -- Jerry West's future (Barone as next year's GM?), the coaching situation, the lack of talented personnel, a disgruntled Pau Gasol, and the franchise being on the market while losing a lot of money. And that's why it's hard for me to be extremely positive about what we've seen so far. I suspect after this past weekend, it's hard for you to be positive, too.

I Have a Dream

2007-01-15T10:53:00.000-06:00

Bargnani's No Darko

2007-01-12T12:08:00.000-06:00

More blogging to come...

Game 1: Knicks 118, Grizzlies 117 (3OT)

2006-11-02T15:57:00.000-06:00

For three quarters of last night's game, this felt more like Game 50 of a long, hard season than Game One. There wasn't much to be thrilled about, since the Grizzlies were getting pushed around by a bad basketball team (and make no mistake about it, the Knicks are indeed a bad basketball team).

Of course, that all changed in the 4th quarter and beyond.

The Knicks were bound and determined to give this game away in the 4th quarter. Their shot selection -- and here I am looking squarely at Marbury, Francis, and especially, especially Jamal Crawford -- was atrocious. Appalling. The Grizzlies were down to the bare bones, talent-wise. Hakim Warrick was defending Eddy Curry at the center position! Curry outweighs him by an easy hundred pounds. Curry eats more than Warrick weighs on a daily basis. Yet brilliant tactician (and impeccable businessman) Isiah Thomas decided the Knicks would be better served by Jamal Crawford jacking up bad shot after bad shot.

Good news for the Grizzlies, then, as the Knicks offensive insanity led to defensive malaise, which led to a furious Griz comeback. One quarter and three overtimes later, the Knicks squeaked one out, but there were certainly positives to be found if you're a Grizzlies fan. Negatives, too, of course.

Positives:

1. Rudy Gay. He was superb. In the 4th quarter and the overtimes, he shot 6-14 from the field and grabbed 7 rebounds (he finished with 21, 8, and 4 blocks). More importantly, he looked very comfortable in the pressure of a tight regular season game. His jumper that landed with 57 seconds left in OT3 was smooth and effortless. He showed a nice post game and good decision-making. AND HE CAN MAKE FREE THROWS! (4-4)

2. Kyle Lowry. What a fun player to watch. He was tenacious on defense and courageous on the boards. How young Lowry got 10 rebounds in his first NBA game is beyond me. Just a remarkable display of desire. He also looked comfortable running the show, and in one game, did more for the Grizzlies than Anthony Roberson and Antonio Burks ever did in the 3rd PG slot. AND HE, TOO, CAN MAKE FREE THROWS! (4-4)

3. Hakim Warrick. Stromile Swift is going to have to fight hard to get his starting 4 slot back. Warrick grabbed 7 offensive boards, scored 22 points, and looked very comfortable with his back to the basket. He is a playmaker and an athletic specimen, and has certainly earned more playing time with this performance. The beginning of a breakout year?

4. Jamal Crawford. Seriously, he might have been the Grizzlies' best player. Apart from a couple of good defensive plays in OT3, he was garbage. Embarrassing performance, more embarrassing that he was allowed to do it by his coach.

5. Crowd enthusiasm. Yeah, the size wasn't great, but the excitement built to a crescendo at the end of the evening. They were on their feet, using their voices, and into the game. Good stuff.

Negatives:

1. Free Throws. Goodness gracious. Make a free throw. It was a problem throughout preseason, and it's a problem now. The Griz went 27-45 from the line. That's 18 misses, for those of you who doubt my math abilities. EIGHTEEN misses! They lost by one. That's enough to make Mike Fratello lose his mind.

2. Mike Miller. What is the opposite of clutch? Mike Miller. Normally, we need to wait until April to see a choke like we saw last night from Mike. He was 1-9 in the 4th quarter and OTs. He almost airballed two free throws that could have given the Griz a one point lead at the end of the first OT. Listen, he's a nice player and a good team guy, but it's time to put this guy on the bench during crunch time. he cannot handle the pressure. It is painfully obvious that he's a three quarter guy. Give the ball to Rudy Gay at the end of the game from here on out. Or Lowry. Or Warrick. Anyone but Miller.

3. The Griz Lost to the Knicks. The Knicks are a very poor basketball team. And the Grizzlies again lost on opening night to a marginal Eastern Conference foe. The Grizzlies need every win they can get in the very tough Western Conference, and this was in every way a winnable game. The Bobcats game tomorrow night is a must-win.

4. Eddie Jones Looks to Be Declining Fast. Mike Fratello simply could not keep Eddie Jones on the floor when the Knicks went with their more athletic lineups after the 3rd quarter. Whether he was tired or too slow, the decline in Eddie's play is obvious. He's coming to the end of a fantastic career. He was leading his teammates verbally on the bench, and he's a great professional, but his usefulness as a player is almost gone.

Overall Record: 0-1 (0-1 home, 0-0 away)

I'm Coming Back...

2006-08-13T17:22:00.000-06:00

I know. I know. Believe me, I am aware that this space hasn't been updated since, I believe, late December 1834.

It's been a while. But you'll note my trademark sense of humor is intact.

I'll be updating more frequently as football season rolls around. I just had to take a summer (a long summer, admittedly) off. I just wanted to check in and let you know I'm still here, and that this glorious site has not been abandoned.

Eli Savoie's been doing some good work over at his blog. As a side note, he has managed to fleece not one, but two companies into sponsoring his site. Quite a salesman, that Savoie. Apparently he's found two companies that couldn't find something, anything at all better to do with money. Good job.

I kid Eli -- mostly because his blog is making him money whereas mine is not. But seriously, perhaps if I actually update my blog periodically, someone might actually want to sponsor it. I'll just have to test that theory out.

Will Askew's been doing nice things over at his blog since I last updated mine -- you might want to check it out as well. He's been dogging me a bit about the whole "not ever updating" thing, as have my cadre of readers. And just so you know, you would not believe the amount of email I didn't get about not updating. It was astounding. With that avalanche of indifference heading towards me, I simply had to respond with this writing.

A few notes to pass along -- the 2006 Babe Draft is currently ongoing. Check out the Morning Rush section of the Sports 56 WHBQ website for a bracket and links to pictures of the girls. Four people -- myself, Ron, intern Brad, and Mario (representing our great listeners and callers) -- have chosen two girls apiece to put in the single-elimination tournament. I cannot tell you which girls I have chosen, nor can any of the other competitors, because we do not want your votes to be tainted by your opinions of us. So be sure to check out the bracket and vote! You can vote by calling 360-8255 during the show and casting it, or you can email rush@sports56whbq.com and we'll get it that way. Either way, make your voice heard and vote for the hottest babes in the world!

Also, this week is Ole Miss week on the program! We'll be talking Rebel football with new offensive coordinator Dan Werner, new offensive line coach Art Kehoe, tight ends coach (and my former geometry teacher at Briarcrest) Hugh Freeze, and, of course, the head man himself, Coach O! We'll have all the interviews archived on our website for later listening, but tune in each morning to hear them live -- the interviews begin at 6:45 am on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday! Thursday's and Friday's interviews (including Coach O) will take place in the 7:05 segment of the program.

Special thanks as always goes out to the Cobra, Keith Parker, our esteemed executive producer, for another stellar job getting guests. He's the best. Also, he's one hell of a snappy dresser. He puts the rest of us to shame.

Finally, this weekend represents the beginning of the English Premier League season! Most of you know I am a huge soccer fan (and the host of the only soccer radio program in the Mid-South, Soccer Fix, airing each and every Wednesday at 10 am), so I am incredibly excited about the fact that Premiership soccer is back. With that in mind, I figured I'd post a few Newcastle videos. Newcastle are far and away my favorite team, and represent something of an obsession for me. Maybe by watching these videos you can see why I like soccer (and Newcastle in particular) so very much.

1. Alan Shearer's Top Ten Newcastle Goals

The legend himself. He's now retired from the game, but the greatest goalscorer ever to wear the black and white will never be forgotten. Enjoy 10 fantastic goals. The goals against Spurs and Everton stand out in particular. Oh, and the song isn't bad, either -- "I Predict a Riot", by Kaiser Chiefs.

2. October 20, 1996, St. James' Park -- Newcastle United 5:0 Manchester United

Arguably the greatest performance in Newcastle United history. This is the height of the Kevin Keegan era at Newcastle, and this is a great representation of the best this team has to offer. Extraordinary.

3. Geordie Pride

This is the gold standard of Newcastle videos. This video is filled with tremendous moments of sadness and triumph that have made Newcastle what it is, and its fans what they are. Incredibly well done. Soundtrack: "My Immortal", by Evanescence

Hope you enjoyed those as much as I did. Remember, the season begins this Saturday -- Newcastle vs. Wigan live at 9 am on Fox Soccer Channel. I'll update again soon -- thanks for reading.

Beat the Mavs

2006-04-22T15:35:00.000-06:00

I'll analyze things more in-depth a little later on, but for now, this will do.

The Fort Worth Star-Telegram is celebrating the Mavericks playoff run by dropping this cartoonish bit of garbage on its website. It's called "Cubie-Doo".

Ha?

Click it and you will immediately begin regretting that decision. I hope Dwain Price had nothing to do with this, because it is just so powerfully stupid. If Mavericks wins equal more cartoons, then please please PLEASE kick their ass, Grizzlies.

A Hugely Important Point About Steroids

2006-04-03T08:22:00.000-06:00

I've heard many people try to make excuses for the Major League Baseball players that chose to use steroids. One of the most popular ones is the simple: "Well, it wasn't technically a banned substance until 2003, so it wasn't really cheating."

Great logic. Hard to argue with that...if steroids weren't specifically banned, then how can using them be cheating? There's only one problem with that:

They were banned. In 1991.

Former Commissioner Fay Vincent put forth an edict in 1991 that specifically mentioned steroids as part of the list of banned substances that teams should actively test for. He also encouraged teams to work with players who may be using not just steroids but other controlled substances in order to help them quit using.

Houston Chronicle columnist Richard Justice brought this out with an entry in his blog recently, and it is a point that is well worth considering. This revelation does a couple of things -- first of all, it silences those that would make the inane and overly pedantic argument that it wasn't cheating because it wasn't technically against the rules. Secondly, it exposes the difficulty that an impotent commissioner had in implementing a testing program for something that was AGAINST THE RULES! After the strike of 1994, (then-acting) Commissioner Bud Selig had far more important things (in his mind) to worry about than controlling the abuse of steroids among his players. In fact, he actively had an incentive to allow steroid abuse to continue -- increased power and increased home runs led to increased attention and increased cash flow for a league that needed to reconnect to its fanbase. It is a remarkable testament to the power of the Baseball Players' Association and the ability of the Commissioner's Office to turn a blind eye to an obvious problem that it took a full decade to actually begin testing for something that had been banned for that entire time.

Whenever people tell you that it was OK to use steroids because they weren't technically against the rules of baseball, gently remind them that they are completely wrong.

Oakland, Days 1 & 2

2006-03-24T12:54:00.000-06:00

One down, one to go.

Welcome to, uh, beautiful (?) Oakland for the NCAA Regionals. I flew into San Francisco International Airport on Wednesday night and took a van over to Oakland -- it was about a 30-40 minute ride. I must admit San Francisco looked beautiful at night -- haven't really seen it yet during the day, but perhaps I'll get my chance later this afternoon. I'm in the media hotel, which happens to be right in the middle of Old Oakland, which seems to be reasonably nice so far. Kind of "rustic", but not necessarily authentically so, if you get my drift. Seems kind of fake.

The street signs are in English and Chinese. So that's different.

Actually, Oakland is much better than I thought it would be. It's definitely no San Francisco, but it's not bad at all. I am enjoying it.

After arriving at the hotel around 10:30 Pacific, I caught a quick bite to eat and tried to hit the bed as soon as I could, knowing that my 3:50 wake up call would be hitting soon. It is really odd to do my show in the morning, be completely finished, and look down to see that it's 6:00 in the morning here in Oakland. It would take me a long time to get used to that. Got a great view, though, so it's not nearly as bad as I thought it would be.

That said, I just got done speaking with the Cobra (Keith Parker, Executive Producer, Sports 56 WHBQ) and his quote to me was, "Peter, in terms of sounding tired, on a scale of one to ten, you're like a 1.5 right now. You sound dead." Apparently the adjustment isn't going as well as I had hoped.

It's for a good reason, though.

There was a weird atmosphere in the Oakland Arena last night (or afternoon) as the Tigers and Bradley tipped it off. The arena was about 3/4 full because a lot of the Gonzaga fans had yet to arrive, so it was just a bizarre scene -- such an important game, so much on the line, and a crowd very much like Grizzlies/Hawks on a Sunday at 3 pm. At least visually. Emotionally, it was like night and day.

As I talked about (and I know I wasn't the only one), for all their good qualities and two excellent players (Marcellus Sommerville and Patrick O'Bryant), Bradley is still BRADLEY. A 13 seed. Tied for 5th in the Missouri Valley Conference. Overmatched athletically. And that was exactly the case. I have a great deal of respect for what head coach Jim Les, his staff, and his players did to get this far. It was a remarkable achievement and one that will serve him well for years to come. But let's be realistic -- Bradley said before the game they would go man-to-man against the Tigers and try to run a little bit. We all thought that was maybe not the best plan, considering the edge the Tigers have in size, length, athleticism, and depth, but hey, I'm not the coach.

Jim Les and Bradley did man up, and they did try to run a little.

And it did not work out well.

But before we get too deep into the game itself, I have to mention this one thing: the Bradley fans had several of the "CBS" signs -- you know, the ones where you start each word of your phrase with C, B, then S in an attempt to get on television? One guy had my personal favorite CBS sign: "C huck norris B elieves in S ommerville" That cracked me up, mostly because I'm scared of Chuck Norris. Here's why.

From the tip, both teams looked a bit nervous, but it was Darius Washington and the Tigers who settled down much more quickly. Bradley took a good 3-4 minutes to get into the flow of the ballgame. Eventually, they did, but they still could never quite come to grips with the questions the Tigers asked in terms of athleticism and skill. Even though Bradley was keeping it close, it seemed pretty apparent that the Tigers were very comfortable with the way the game was playing out. The biggest reason the Tigers couldn't quite separate from Bradley in the first half was Patrick O'Bryant, who had 7 points and 11 rebounds at intermission. Joey Dorsey was getting overmatched a little bit, maybe because of nerves, maybe because of the matchup itself, but O'Bryant was grabbing boards left and right against Dorsey (and, to be fair, against Kareem Cooper, too).

I was also impressed with Sommerville. His game seems like it could translate well to the next level -- he's got a nice bit of size and strength for his position, and can shoot a bit -- kind of a poor man's Shane Battier. Shawne Williams agreed after the game, as he was very complimentary of his ability.

However, Bradley had a serious size disadvantage in the backcourt, one that was ably exploited early and often by Darius Washington, who stepped up and had a big game when his team needed him. They could not handle the size and speed of Darius. In fact, at one point in the second half, Darius knifed through the Bradley defense and laid in an easy basket -- that caused guard Tony Bennett (no, not the silver-haired crooner) to absolutely go off on his fellow guard Will Franklin. He was just screaming at the guy because neither one had the size or speed to stop Darius. That was the beginning of the end.

In the second half, Memphis played with tremendous poise and skill on both sides of the court. Defensively, they were just incredible, holding Bradley to 27% shooting in the 2nd half and outrebounding them handily as well. Bradley's tired legs caught up to them, too. It was just too much to ask to hang with Memphis for 40 minutes. Patrick O'Bryant fell back to Earth with a thud in the second half, scoring just one point and grabbing 3 boards. Joey Dorsey was much better defensively and offensively in the second, despite a bad technical.

As Geoff Calkins referenced in his column today, the only real exciting part of the second half came when no one, but two courtside monitors began smoking one after the other. And I don't mean a little bit, I mean smoking like someone shoveled dry ice into them. Jarvis Greer was sitting next to one of them, but I'm pretty sure Jarvo had nothing to do with it. At least, I don't think he did. Jarvo, you'll have to call into the show or email me to tell me for sure what happened.

Anyway, the eventual win was an inevitability greeted less with excitement and more with a business-like resolve. Just like Dallas. These guys expect to win every time out, and they will expect to win tomorrow against UCLA. It is in their makeup. To me, that is the best part of John Calipari's coaching job -- he has his guys believing they can run through walls and come out unscathed. They are mentally tough right now. No, they haven't played a "major" opponent yet, but I would defy you to find a more impressive run than the Tigers' in this tournament. They've won every game by 16. Nothing much more you can ask from a group of guys than that. I eagerly anticipate the game against UCLA tomorrow, because it is going to be an incredible matchup. Great guards on both teams, impact freshmen all around, and athletic ability to spare from both teams.

Speaking of UCLA, I still cannot believe they won that ballgame last night. That was one of the best games I've had the privilege to watch in person -- Gonzaga was doing everything right, and UCLA was doing everything wrong. UCLA did not make a field goal until there was 11:20 left in the first half. Gonzaga's defense was great, and UCLA looked tight.

In fact, even late into the second half, this game was over. Done. Forget about it. Gonzaga was completely in control -- Gonzaga knew it, UCLA knew it, and the numerous UCLA fans knew it. However, I give the Bruins and Ben Howland a ton of credit for never giving up -- and once they started putting some pressure on Gonzaga, the Zags got so nervous they could barely breathe. It was a serious case of tight sphincter. The only question was whether or not they could just hang on to squeeze out a victory. Obviously, they couldn't. They made tons of mistakes down the stretch, the biggest being J.P. Batista getting the ball stolen away, which led to the incredibly-named Luc Richard Mbah a Moute's game-winning layup.

After Derek Raivio lost the ball, leading to UCLA getting it back leading by one with 2.6 seconds to play, Adam Morrison started crying on the court. Crying while the game was still being played. Crying while his team was almost guaranteed to have at least a chance to tie with a 3 (they actually could have won it with a 3 because Arron Afflalo missed a free throw). I've never seen that before. I know he's a competitor, but that was really troubling. You can't cry before the game ends. You just can't.

Give big credit to the Gonzaga band -- they hit everyone with a tremendous rendition of "Don't Fear the Reaper", and OH YEAH, they had one guy just playing the absolute daylights out of the cowbell.

He explored the space -- no question -- he really explored the space. I liked what I heard.

One other thing -- despite the crushing loss, and the inexplicably premature tears, I have to give credit to Adam Morrison for playing his guts out. He had a stellar college career and lifted Gonzaga to impressive heights. He's going to be a great NBA player, and I have a lot of respect for the intensity with which he plays.

Well, there's just one step left on the road to the Final Four, but it's by far the toughest -- UCLA in a very pro-Bruin environment tomorrow. It's going to be incredible. We'll have a special pregame show tomorrow afternoon on Sports 56 WHBQ -- Eli and Rob will be hosting from Memphis, and I'll be here in Oakland with a full preview.

Special thanks goes to our sponsors Cougar Chemical Company, Bartlett Lanes, Olympic Fitness Center, Jimmy's, and Pizza Pro for helping make the trip out to Oakland possible. They are big Tiger supporters and good people, so it's nice to be associated with folks like that.

Also, extra special thanks to all of you who like the blog. And to those that hate it, too...as long as you're reading it, it's cool with me.

Dallas, Day 2

2006-03-17T20:21:00.000-06:00

It's always nice to be reminded of why you do what you do. For me, this has been a really nice opportunity to see up close the emotion and spirit involved in college sports, and there is no better place to see pure, raw emotion than the NCAA Tournament. It's incredible, and it always reminds me why sports are so great and so needed in our society.

Enough philosophizing. Let's get to the action.

It is at this point that I would like to remind you that I predicted the EXACT OUTCOME of the Arkansas/Bucknell game. Score and everything. Why didn't I put some money on that? Can you even bet on the exact score of a game? Anyway, my girlfriend is an Arkansas fan, and she has blamed me for the loss today. Apparently I have a lot more power than I realize. So, to all the Arkansas fans out there (and to one in particular), I'm sorry if somehow my exact pick caused some sort of cosmic, space-time shift that meant the score I predicted would come to pass. My bad.

As far as the game is concerned, Arkansas has only themselves to blame for this one -- bad free throw shooting and poor decisions with the ball hurt them badly. Ronnie Brewer went through several stretches where he simply did not touch the ball at all. He's your absolute best -- your number one player -- he simply has to touch it far more than he did. Bucknell's disciplined, they're smart, and they limit the possessions of their opposition. It was a combination that Stan Heath and the Razorbacks had little answer for.

I do not understand why Arkansas didn't press Bucknell more. In fact, they didn't even push the tempo at all, for some reason. When Arkansas pressed them late in the game, Bucknell wilted. But it was too late.

A lot of credit goes to Razorback Nation, who showed up in force in Dallas. Tons of Hog fans, tons of folks callin' those Hogs all the time -- the atmosphere was great, and would have been even louder on Sunday had Arkansas won (many more fans had planned to make the trip this weekend). Conversely, Bucknell didn't have a huge following, but what was there was loud. And different. Allow me to illustrate: one Bucknell fan, angry over a perceived bad call, screamed the following phrase: "What a farce!"

What a farce?

Yeah, Bucknell's fans are different. But they were much happier at the end. Memphis has some work to do to prepare for Bucknell, because they are certainly a much different team than Oral Roberts. Or just about anyone the Tigers played this season.

I'll get to Memphis/ORU thoughts in a moment. First, a few things:

--The NCAA is very anal. You may have known this already judging by the way they enforce their rules with the players/coaches/schools. However, it's hammered into your skull when you cover one of their events. First of all, they are "student-athletes", not "players". Secondly, when you are in the media section, you have to drink from a specific NCAA/Dasani labeled cup. Every time. They give the ushers huge stacks of these cups to make sure that all the media in their section have the proper cups. It's ridiculous.

--TV timeouts suck. TV timeouts suck worse in person. NCAA Tournament TV timeouts are interminably boring. You want to jam an ice pick into your skull because there's so much downtime. It's just asinine. If you're looking for an upside, here's the only one: you do get plenty of chances to check out various cheerleaders, which isn't bad at all.

--American Airlines Center is beautiful. The exterior is really nice -- much better, in my opinion, than FedExForum -- and the interior playing area is cool. There are no hustle boards or big scoreboards in the arena, which is something I've gotten used to having spent so much time in FedExForum. The media area of FedExForum is much better, not only because it is dedicated to the memory of the great Don Poier, but also because it's just easier to maneuver in the Forum.

--Saw Tim Cowlishaw and J.A. Adande from ESPN's Around the Horn fulfilling their newspapery obligations. Adande seems cool, but I have to be honest and tell you that Cowlishaw came across as a bit of a jackass. I didn't talk to either, so I may well be totally off-base here. Just my thoughts.

--Nice touch by the NCAA and whoever sponsored it to throw in a media relaxation center complete with XBox 360. I played a little Fight Night Round 3 with a couple of colleagues and I don't mind telling you I absolutely pounded them. I dare say no one can touch my Fight Night skills. Bring it!

Now, to Memphis' win over Oral Roberts. The Memphis fan contingent wasn't particularly huge -- in fact, Oral Roberts probably had more fans in AAC -- but it was hopping. The Tiger fans were fired up right from the get go. Local, um, "celebrity" Mark Goodfellow was in the house (remarkably conservatively dressed), as was actual celebrity Congressman Harold Ford, Jr.

Oral Roberts was on fire throughout this game. They were hitting shot after shot, and they gave Memphis a nice run for the first 15 minutes or so. Memphis got a tad sloppy with the ball and committed a few too many fouls, but apart from that, they didn't make too many huge mistakes. ORU simply played really, really well for a big part of this game. A lot of credit should go to their coach Scott Sutton and to Caleb Green, their really skilled big man.

However, the Tigers shot the ball well, ran their offense nicely, and managed to avoid too many lulls that would have caused them trouble. I was impressed with the composure of Shawne Williams, Antonio Anderson, and the rest of the young Tigers who had never played an NCAA Tournament game. Shawne Williams told me after the game he considered this a "walk in the park". I asked him to clarify, and he said that he had been playing basketball his whole life, and this was no different for him and the other young Tigers. If they can keep this attitude going, it will serve them well.

Joey Dorsey did not play particularly well. That has to change eventually if the Tigers are going to go deep in the tournament. He looked frustrated with the tight officiating and with the physicality and trash talk of Caleb Green. Green is a smacktalker -- big time. He was jawing and smirking and getting under Dorsey's skin. Kareem Cooper did a nice job in more minutes than he's used to seeing, but Dorsey is really important to this team.

It was a very business-like locker room for the Tigers. One down, more to go. We'll see if they can get it done Sunday.

--My man from Northwestern State had some serious cojones to take and hit that shot, huh? Iowa, feel free to talk to 1997 Ole Miss to find out what it will be like to see that shot repeated over and over for the next decade-plus.

--Albany? Albany was up 50-38 on UConn? What kind of crazy world are we living in? Of course, Connecticut went ahead and finished with a 34-9 run, but still. Remarkable effort by the Great Danes.

--Nice 2nd half, Michigan State. Terrible.

--How can people argue that this isn't the best 4 days in sports? I love the tournament.

Peace.

Dallas, Day 1

2006-03-16T16:30:00.000-06:00

I'm writing this from my room in the Renaissance Hotel in Dallas. It's pretty nice, actually. I slept like a baby last night.

Nothing of import to report from the long car trip from Memphis to Dallas, other than a couple minor points:

1. If you need to fill your car up with gas, do so before you hit I-30 West in North Texas. Apparently the word has not gotten to them that Texas is an oil state, and gas really ought to be available more often than once every 40 miles or so. You know the meter in your car that counts down the miles left before you run out of gas? My meter was showing this: ---- and blinking over and over. Not good. Fortunately, I managed to find an Exxon before I broke down in Whogivesacrap, Texas.

2. I hate traffic. In particular, I hate when two 18-wheelers decide that they absolutely have to drive side by side on a two lane interstate highway for tens of miles, blocking traffic along the way, at a robust 5 miles below the speed limit. If you're going to pass, pass. If you're not, get back in the right lane. Sorry. Just got a little frustrated there. I'm working on dealing with my road rage problem.

One interesting thing I immediately noticed: the NCAA Tournament doesn't seem to be much of a big deal here in Dallas at all. It was not a topic on the sports radio station I listened to on the way into the Metroplex (1310 the Ticket -- excellent station), and none of the locals appear to be enamored with it at all. I suppose since the local teams are SMU and TCU, college basketball isn't exactly topic numero uno on the minds of your average Dallas sports fan. For what it's worth, the big topic of the day was T.O. potentially signing with the Cowboys. Most are in favor of it. I am not. But we'll save that for later.

I ate at some steakhouse (there are a lot of them -- ask George for more details) about 10 minutes from my hotel last night with the Fox 13 crew -- always nice to get WHBQ-AM and WHBQ-TV together. I gotta tell you -- the sirloin was so smoked, I thought the cow had been in a forest fire. I'm all about some smoky flavor, but I also like a little, you know, meat flavor in my meat. Not the best meal. Good atmosphere, though.

After the show this morning, I -- Quick note -- I'm watching the Alabama/Marquette game as I type this. The TV has frozen with :54.6 left in the game, and Bama up 2. It's not coming back. I may throw it out the window. Must. Not. Destroy. Room. Heh -- they've just put up a screen saying, "No need to call us. We are aware this TV station is having problems." Apparently I'm not the only one that noticed the problem RIGHT AT THE END OF A GREAT NCAA TOURNAMENT GAME.

OK, the Bama/Marquette game is apparently over now. Still no TV. Bama won. Good. I need someone on my bracket to win for once. If BC had lost to Pacific, it would have marked the fastest bracket disaster in my personal history. I knew I shouldn't have put an Al Skinner team in the Final Four.

Let me try again...after the show this morning, I went over to American Airlines Center for some press conferences and the University of Memphis open practice. Some impressions:

Oral Roberts press conference: The ORU players really appeared relaxed and, dare I say, confident. Caleb Green, their interior presence, is an awfully tough customer and is a much more talented player than you would expect to see on a #16-seeded team. They said everything you would expect them to say. Coach Scott Sutton was a genial, friendly guy who spoke at length about his experiences at his dad's side during Arkansas' previous NCAA Tournament runs. He did mention that he had talked to his dad recently, and that he is feeling much better after recent back surgery. He added that he considered Rodney Carney to be the best pure athlete in college basketball. Scott Sutton said he expected the Razorback fans in attendance to stay after their game and support the Golden Eagles. I imagine they will. They would support almost anyone instead of John Calipari and Memphis.

Memphis press conference: Let's get it out of the way -- in the least shocking thing of the year, someone asked Darius Washington about missing the free throws last year against Louisville. Wow. Original question there, pal. Darius was joined by a very eloquent Rodney Carney, who talked at length about not having been heavily recruited and about the lack of respect shown nationally to the Tigers. Both Rodney and Darius said that the simplest way to earn respect was to keep winning -- and both took great pains to describe the respect they have for Oral Roberts. John Calipari then entered and talked about this team's desire to win and the fact that the youth of this team might not be a disadvantage, since they "don't know what it's like to lose". Cal, Carney, and Darius talked at length about the fact that Conference USA is much harder than people think (what else would they say?), and that they feel adequately prepared for tomorrow's game (and beyond).

Arkansas press conference: Jonathon Modica and Ronnie Brewer represented the players -- they seemed thrilled to be there. They talked about the loyalty of the fans, and Ronnie mentioned how badly he wanted to pay the senior players of Arkansas back for what they had done for him; he felt good about bringing good feelings to the Arkansas fans. Modica compared Arkansas fans to, yes, pit bulls. Why? "They're loyal, but sometimes they can get a little fierce." Interesting. They both want desperately to win for Stan Heath, who Brewer talked about as a really good, inspiring coach.

Here are my predictions for tomorrow:

Memphis 92, Oral Roberts 67
Bucknell 59, Arkansas 55
Texas 79, Penn 59
California 78, N.C. State 69

Briefly:

--How about that shot by Chris Lofton to give Tennessee the win? I guess conventional wisdom was dead on about Winthrop. The Vols got lucky -- they probably should have lost.

--The "Express Checkout" Award goes to Seton Hall. Wow. Thanks for showing up. Guess Cincinnati should have been the 8th Big East team in.

--I wish Memphis had a Whataburger. Best fast food burger out there.

Peace.

I'm Back, Suckas!

2006-03-13T10:00:00.000-06:00

I'm going to go ahead and get it out of the way. I've heard all the comments, and I know I've disappointed my legion of fan (I'm talking to you, Graham) because of the infrequency of my updates. I cannot apologize more for that. Actually, I suppose I could apologize more, but I won't. It's all I can do to apologize this much, frankly. Writer's block and a much busier schedule combined to knock me out for a while. So, I am sorry. But you've got me now, because this is my favorite time of the year, and I am pumped about the brackets, baby!

I don't think it's unfair to say this is the most bizarre set of brackets I can recall. Some of the selections (I'm looking at you, Air Force and George Mason) and some of the seedings (ahem...Tennessee and Indiana) make absolutely no sense. I'm happy with some of the decisions, angered by others, and just flat out confused by many of them. Let's get to it:

1. Memphis got screwed geographically, not competitively.

The Tigers are your top seed in the Oakland region, which in and of itself is not a measure of getting screwed. They were deservedly the worst of the number one seeds, which means they got shipped out west. Such is life. Quite honestly, when you look at the potential matchups for Memphis, they really aren't that bad. Oral Roberts is probably the best 16th seed in the history of the NCAA Tournament. For more on that, check out this excerpt from Ken Pomeroy's blog:

If a 16 ever beats a 1, it will be this season. To compound matters, the committee really got sloppy in giving Oral Roberts a 16-seed. To compound matters further, the Golden Eagles have drawn the weakest one-seed in Memphis. 16-seeds are 0-84 all-time. It’s safe to say Oral Roberts has a better that 1-in-84 chance of beating Memphis. Much better.
Log5 says that Oral Roberts has about a 1-in-8 chance of pulling off the unthinkable. Log5 doesn’t do so well with extreme matchups. It says Southern has a 1-in-40 chance of beating Duke, when Southern’s chances are truly much worse. But I’d give ORU a 1-in-15 chance of a win. Which means that hyping this game will result in me looking like an idiot 14 out of 15 times, but that’s what I am all about. I’d feel a lot more comfortable if ORU could play an effective zone, but since they’re coached by a Sutton, I’m guessing they won’t consider doing that. And their defensive stats suggest a team that exclusively plays man-to-man: low 3FGA/FGA, low A/FGM, high DR%.

But what the heck, I’ll throw my weight behind this game the remainder of the week. It’s a chance to witness history, if only a slim one.

Pomeroy's a pretty well-respected college basketball journalist, so this is rather interesting to read. Despite the numbers listed above, I'm going to go out on a limb and predict a Memphis win against Oral Roberts. I know, I'm a maverick. Pomeroy would hate me for that if he had any idea who I was.

To me the biggest problem comes from the geographic aspect of Memphis' potential run. Oral Roberts is in Tulsa, which obviously is much closer to Dallas (Memphis' first/second round site) than Memphis. That's not a problem, since Memphis should beat Oral Roberts even if they play in Rev. Oral Roberts' backyard. The problem comes in the second round. Assuming Arkansas beats Bucknell, and that is by no means a foregone conclusion, Memphis would then play Arkansas in Dallas -- much more of a home-court advantage for the Hogs than the Tigers. Again.

It continues. In the Round of 16, the Tigers would face Kansas if seeding holds, another team that's closer to the site (Oakland, CA) than Memphis would be. Of course, should 5th-seeded Pittsburgh get through, this would be a moot point. Finally, the prospect looms that the Tigers would play UCLA in the Elite Eight, with Los Angeles clearly closer to Oakland than Memphis. Even if Gonzaga, the third seed, gets through to the Elite Eight, Gonzaga is in Spokane, which is in Washington, which (and correct me if I'm wrong, Rand McNally) is closer to Oakland than Memphis. Let me check the map. Yep. Here's the map from Memphis to Oakland. UCLA is closer (by 1600 miles, give or take). Gonzaga is closer (by only 1100 miles or so). I would have thought getting a number one seed would have afforded you a little more home court protection than that.

However, Memphis is not alone in this. If I'm Boston College, I am absolutely furious with the so-called "pod" system. They got well and truly rogered, as the Brits might say. They are a 4 seed (and I think they really should have been a 3), which is supposed to afford them protection in their 4-team group. It didn't. They got placed in Salt Lake City, against a tough 13 seed in Pacific (which obviously is much closer to SLC than Boston is), then against a nightmare matchup in 5th-seeded Nevada. Ridiculous.

2. Seeding decisions were inconsistent and bizarre.

I have no problem with any of the #1 seeds. However, Tennessee as a #2 seed defies explanation. Given the Vols' poor finish to the season (2-4 in their last 6 games), it would seem that the committee placed a huge amount of weight on the Vols' RPI, which has stayed high all season long (they were a 6 in the final NCAA RPI). I guess since Florida turned out to be a #3 seed, Tennessee's two victories over the Gators factored in strongly, as well. Regardless, I would have been far more comfortable with North Carolina as the #2 seed, and Tennessee as the #3 in the Washington, DC bracket.

Boston College should have been a #3. Their finish in the ACC and the talent level they've got should have pushed them above Gonzaga, who just did not deserve even a #3 seed. Which Top 50 RPI teams did Gonzaga beat? Exactly.

There is no way an 18-11 Indiana team should have been a #6 seed. No chance. It doesn't even approach making sense. This is a team that has struggled mightily at times, and despite playing better late in the season, the Hoosiers look ripe for an upset by #11 San Diego State. More on this later.

3. There are some mouth-watering matchups in the first round.

Rather than a standard list, I'll just give you what I think is the best of each of the seeding matchups -- i.e. the best #1 vs. #16, #2 vs. #15, and so on.

Best 1/16 Game: 1) Memphis vs. 16) Oral Roberts: For the reasons listed above and more, Oral Roberts is the best 16 seed in the NCAA Tournament. Maybe the best 16 seed ever. The Tigers have at times struggled to start games with authority, and if they do that again in Dallas, Oral Roberts will give them a game. I fully expect Memphis to win comfortably, but this should be the most interesting 1/16 game.

Best 2/15 Game: 2) Tennessee vs. 15) Winthrop: This looks more like a 4/13 game to me. Winthrop is a very solid team with a phenomenal young coach in Gregg Marshall. Tennessee may feel the pressure of having to justify what many (myself included) consider an overseeding. Plus, it has looked like Tennessee's lega are fading a little bit at the end of a season of massive overachievement. All of those factors spell trouble for the Vols, and a potentially close game in Greensboro.

Best 3/14 Game: 3) Florida vs. 14) South Alabama: Ole Miss fans, keep a close eye on this one. This could be a preview of how your new coach will play in the SEC. Much like Bruce Pearl did last year in leading UW-Milwaukee to a win over Alabama in the first round, then moving to Tennessee at season's end, South Alabama head coach John Pelphrey could do the same thing here. If the Jaguars make a run that begins with this improbable upset, Pelphrey could be in Oxford by the beginning of April. Florida's not likely to stumble like they have in years past, but even when they made the Final Four in 2000, they just barely got by Butler in Round One. Expect a tight game here.

Best 4/13 Game: 4) Kansas vs. 13) Bradley: Much like Memphis, Kansas is an athletically gifted team that won its conference tournament. Also like Memphis, it is a team full of inexperience. The Jayhawks start 3 freshmen and 2 sophomores, and have a history of struggling in the first round of the tournament. In fact, just look at last year's experienced Kansas team -- 3 senior starters -- that lost to 14th-seeded Bucknell in the first round last year. Bradley's got the edge on the interior in this matchup, and if they can slow down the athletes of Kansas, they can keep it close. If there's two minutes left in the game, and this one is tied, I know I'm giving the edge to the Braves.

Best 5/12 Game: 5) Syracuse vs. 12) Texas A&M: I expect the Orange to fall here. A&M is led by PG Acie Law, who has been phenomenal throughout the season, but especially towards the end. Syracuse has to be exhausted after their incredible run to a Big East title at MSG, and they should return to playing at their normal level, which is to say, not all that good. The Aggies have an impressive defensive team, and they can take advantage of a questionable Syracuse frontcourt. It will be low-scoring, and it will be an upset.

Best 6/11 Game: 6) Indiana vs. 11) San Diego State: I am impressed with the way Indiana responded to the Mike Davis situation. They seem to have had some of the pressure taken off their shoulders, and it has been evident in their play. However, Indiana is not a great offensive team, and San Diego State can really get after you athletically, which means they're not the best matchup Indiana could have gotten. Marco Killingsworth is one of the best post players in the country when he's on, but Indiana must find consistent help for him to succeed. I think they'll struggle to do that against SDSU, and that's why I think the Aztecs will win.

Best 7/10 Game: 7) Marquette vs. 10) Alabama: The 7/10 and 8/9 games are more or less even ones, so I don't necessarily consider a 10 or a 9 winning an upset. That said, because of the balance of the teams involved, these are typically some of the best games of the first round. I expect a good one with Marquette trying to get by Alabama -- Richard Hendrix has been getting better and better for the Tide, but it all revolves around JerMareo Davidson. If he's in, the Tide can dominate inside. If not, they will get gunned by Marquette's shooters.

Best 8/9 Game: 8) Kentucky vs. 9) UAB: And the committee says these matchups are computer-generated? Come on. This, of course, is a rematch from the 2004 NCAA Tournament Second Round, when top-seeded Kentucky was stunned by the 9th-seeded Blazers. Things are much different now. Kentucky has vacillated between having a miserable season and having a terrible season. Tubby's on the hot seat. Hard to believe the Wildcats are an 8 seed. Kentucky is typically a good postseason team, and if they can get it all together, they've got the talent to get by UAB. However, with UAB's outstanding pressure defense and consistent guard play (Johnson and McDonald are superb), they can give the shaky UK guards all they can handle. Kentucky wins, but it's very close.

4. Jim Nantz and Billy Packer need to shut the hell up.

In case you missed the NCAA Selection Show on CBS this past Sunday, Jim Nantz and Billy Packer basically jumped down NCAA Tournament Selection Committee Chairman Craig Littlepage's throat. They obviously disagreed with some of the committee's decisions, as most of us did, and they let their emotions take over. They were rude, they were condescending, and they belittled the work of Littlepage and his committee members. I expect the lunatic ranting and raving from Billy Packer, a bitter, grumpy old man who just needs to down a little Metamucil to get regular again. Packer is so obviously biased towards the power conferences, it's frightening. Yes, yes, Billy...there are other conferences besides the Big 10 and ACC! It's true! And, you know what, sometimes the teams that play in those conferences are pretty good!

If Packer had his way, the conference breakdown would look like this:

Big 10: 11
Big East: 14
ACC: 12
SEC: 9
Pac-10: 8
Big 12: 7
Missouri Valley: 0
Everyone Else: 3

I think Billy just passed out from excitement. Anyway, my only request to Nantz, who really should have known better, and Old Man Packer is to shut the hell up, let the rest of us enjoy a tournament with big and small teams alike, and please stop using misleading statistics to present an obviously biased personal agenda on national television. Thank you.

I'll be headed to Dallas tomorrow to cover the Tigers' first and (presumably) second round games...I'll try my best to do a little live blogging on the scene to give you some good, solid information. No promises, though.

Finally, feel free to watch the last 2:30 of quite possibly my favorite tournament game ever. Cameron Mills! Wayne Turner! Fans, we gotta go...we're out of time!

Retire Now, Brett.

2006-01-12T10:27:00.000-06:00

This is Mike McCarthy, soon to be the new head coach of the Green Bay Packers.

He was the offensive coordinator of the San Francisco 49ers last season. Yes, those same 49ers that went a robust 4-12 and who were, statistically, the worst offense in the NFL. He's known in some circles as a quarterback coaching guru, and just look what he did with Alex Smith this year!

Makes sense to me.

Just look at him -- head coach material all the way!

New Year's Bloviation

2006-01-06T12:09:00.000-06:00

I'm feeling kind of venomous today for some reason, and I feel like venting just a little bit. Hope you'll indulge me. Before I start, though, I want to wish everyone a happy and healthy New Year -- all the best to you and yours in 2006.

The Grizzlies

First of all, just to put in written words what I've been saying for the last few days: some of these potential offers for a point guard replacing Damon Stoudamire are just ridiculous. My favorite dumbass offer is a proposed Dahntay Jones + 2nd rd pick to Charlotte for Brevin Knight. Do you realize how bad Charlotte would look for taking that deal? They would give up a leader on that team, a guy who's averaging a career-high 12.8 points per game, a guy who is the NBA's leader in steals and 5th best in assists per-game for DAHNTAY JONES and a worthless second?

While Dahntay may end up being a valuable player somewhere down the road, he isn't now. He cannot be guaranteed any time whatsoever in Mike Fratello's system, he has struggled offensively (especially from the outside), and is already 25, which means it's time for him to start perfoming soon. Charlotte would have to be crazy to take
that deal.

Here are a couple of other moves that would work under the salary cap restrictions (these are all just my ideas, mind you, not necessarily actual offers or offers to come):

Brian Cardinal for Chucky Atkins (Washington) -- you get a skilled PG who has averaged over 13 ppg when he gets starter's minutes; he's on the last year of his contract, and you get rid of Cardinal's long-term deal. It is likely the Grizzlies would have to throw in a pick or somethng else of value to make this work.

Jake Tsakalidis/Dahntay Jones for Jeff McInnis/Linton Johnson (New Jersey) -- Bye, bye Jake. With the lack of bigs in NJ, the Nets might be able to use Jake a bit. Dahntay would go as well, but you'd get an underrated PG in McInnis and a untested SF in Johnson.

Just a couple of ideas there, but those are more in line with reality, I think. I'd also love to see a move made for Speedy Claxton of NOOCH, but I think Byron Scott values him a lot more than people might realize.

Grizzlies take on Utah tonight in the Forum, and you have to know that the craptactular loss to the Jazz in Salt Lake City on December 26th is on the back of the Grizzlies' minds. It was the only thing separating them from a 4-0 road trip, and it was a disastrous performance all the way around (blew an 18 point 3rd quarter lead by allowing the Jazz a 20-0 run). Expect a win tonight.

However, I would be remiss if I didn't point out that Andrei Kirilenko had one of the most remarkable stat lines I've ever seen in Utah's 90-80 win over the Lakers this past Tuesday night: 14 points, 8 rebounds, 9 assists, 6 steals, and 7 blocks! That is as close to a quintuple-double as I think you'll ever see. He's a really unique player.

NFL Playoffs

I love the NFL Playoffs, especially when my Redskins manage to make it into the party. I'll talk about them in a moment. First, though, I have to make a few comments about the New England Patriots. Three-time Super Bowl champion Tom Brady was quoted earlier this week as saying, "I think we've probably been disrespected more than any team in the league this year."

Allow me to repeat the quote from the man who received 10 votes for NFL MVP this season: "I think we've probably been disrespected more than any team in the league this year."

WHAT? Here are a couple of recent related media quotes:

John Clayton, ESPN: "The Patriots may not have linebacker Tedy Bruschi, but they are relatively healthy coming into this game. Tom Brady is almost unstoppable in home playoff games. Heck, he's been unstoppable in the postseason (9-0), period. Of all the playoffs (sic) games, this is one that could be very one-sided."

Just look at that disrespect!

Peter King, Tom Brady sycophant, SI.com: (King has the Patriots ranked second in the NFL right now, despite their 10-6 record) "The Associated Press polls 50 media people for their All-Pro team and awards. I'm a voter. The AP asks for one MVP. Why Brady? Basically because he refused to let this team die in the wake of all the injuries."

Shameful!

The Patriots will win this weekend against Jacksonville, but it really ought to be pointed out that no playoff team has been more overlooked than Jacksonville -- has anyone, anywhere picked Jacksonville to beat New England? Anyone? Isn't that
somewhat, I don't know, disrespectful of a team with a better record than New England?

Complete playoff picks:

Panthers 23, Giants 21
Redskins 17, Bucs 10
Patriots 24, Jaguars 13
Bengals 31, Steelers 21

I know I'm a Redskins homer, and I don't deny that. But all of you need to go to the Redskins' official site and check out Clinton Portis' Thursday press conferences. If you haven't been following them, he does the press conferences entirely in characters. Weird characters. But it's incredibly entertaining and very creative -- a complete and total change from every other press conference out there. He's had characters named "Dollah Bill", "Sheriff Gonna Getcha", "Southeast Jerome", "Inspector Two Two", and "Dr. I Don't Know". Click here for more details, including pictures of the characters.

His latest is "Coach Janky Spanky", a stereotypical coach complete with beer gut, inflatable headphones, and white ears (a social commentary on race and coaching, perhaps?). He suggests that he should have been the 'Skins defensive coordinator instead of Gregg Williams, and gives some great ideas about defenses (13 players on the field), blitzing (do it all the time), and personnel (Santana Moss as a CB?).

You have to be rooting for the Redskins to make it to the Super Bowl, just to see how Clinton Portis handles the week of media coverage. It would be extraordinary.

Rose Bowl

How that game lived up to the impossibly huge barrage of hype is beyond me. But it did. It did, and then some. If any team can speak of disrespect in the last month, it would be Texas. ESPN had anointed USC the second-greatest college football team in history over the last month -- their series matching them up against the great teams of the past half-century almost always ended with 2005 USC winning. There was no mention that maybe, just maybe, 2005 Texas might actually have a chance to stop the gilded triangle of Leinart, Bush, and Carroll.

I'm pretty sure 2004 USC beats 2005 USC handily.

There are very few words that can adequately convey just how impressive Vince Young was in the Rose Bowl. He finished with 467 total yards (200 rushing, 267 passing) and three touchdowns, but even those numbers do not tell the full story of how dominating his presence was on the field. He was in complete and total command of that game. I have never seen a better individual performance than that. It was just jaw-dropping in every way.

It is impossible for Vince Young's stock to rise any higher than it already has. He has nothing left to prove at a collegiate level, and it is time for his special talents to be showcased in the NFL. Of course, that begs the following questions: where would he be picked? Should he be picked higher than Matt Leinart? Should he be picked higher than Reggie Bush?

Those that look merely at his weird throwing mechanics overlook the fact that his throws have power and reasonable precision -- most weird throwing motions indicate a lack of strength or accuracy. Not so much with Vince. Furthermore, his running ability is just incredible, and I do think it will translate to the NFL. He's big enough to absorb a lot of punishment (unlike Michael Vick), and is elusive enough to make people miss (unlike Daunte Culpepper). I would take him before Matt Leinart, but not in front of Reggie Bush. He is the greatest player in Rose Bowl history, perhaps the greatest Texas Longhorn in history, and he will be a special player in the NFL.

Random Thoughts

Keith Jackson needs to retire. I love his voice, and he lends an air of gravitas to any game he calls, but he just doesn't have it any more. Here's a nice list of some of his babbling during the Rose Bowl. He was completely silent on the Vince Young TD that gave Texas the win...that's just inexcusable. I love ya, Keith, but it's time to hang it up.

What the hell is the U.S. Postal Service doing raising the price of stamps to 39 cents? I just bought -- JUST FREAKING BOUGHT -- a huge amount of 37 cent stamps, and now I'm going to have to buy one cent stamps to make up the difference. Ridiculous. Oh yeah, and just try to buy only ONE stamp at the post Office. Can't be done. What a scam.

Just a moment for my Newcastle fandom to show here -- Graeme Souness needs to be fired. Right now. Here's the dumbass quote of the year from Souness: "I don't think I've done anything wrong." Other than a complete lack of tactics, building a squad with no depth and no long-term planning, guiding Newcastle to a worst-ever Premiership finish despite spending $80 million, and constantly blaming everything and everyone but himself for the problems, he's right. Get rid.

Note to Tampa Bay: Playing "Rock You Like a Hurricane" at halftime of a game against New Orleans is not recommended. They have, in fact, been rocked like a hurricane by an actual hurricane.

Wedding Crashers is out on DVD, and to celebrate, I've decided to compile a list of what I like to call "The Pantheon of Comedy Movies". These are my absolute must-see comedies. Here's my list (in no particular order), but you can feel free to add yours in the comments below, or via email.

THE PANTHEON:
Swingers
Old School
Wedding Crashers
Tommy Boy
Anchorman
Billy Madison
Happy Gilmore
Fear of a Black Hat (trust me)
The 40-Year-Old Virgin
This is Spinal Tap
Best in Show
Clerks
Mallrats
Kingpin
...And God Spoke (also trust me)
Austin Powers: Int'l Man of Mystery
Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Major League
Dr. Strangelove
There's Something About Mary
Animal House
Caddyshack
Meet the Parents
Rushmore
Airplane
Blazing Saddles
Kentucky Fried Movie
Coming to America
Ghostbusters
A Fish Called Wanda
Uncle Buck
Who's Harry Crumb?
Planes, Trains, and Automobiles
The Great Outdoors
Canadian Bacon
Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Election
National Lampoon's Vacation
National Lampoon's European Vacation
National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation
Office Space
Waiting for Guffman
A Christmas Story
Raising Arizona
Scrooged
Groundhog Day
The Big Lebowski
Fletch
Brewster's Millions
American Pie

The Pantheon of Funny Television Shows is coming soon. Feel free to add your suggestions to that, as well.

Finally, my thoughts and prayers go out to the family of Chris Mosby, the young man who lost his life last week in a car accident. He was a hero to a lot of people in the CBHS family and throughout this area, and was a shining example of all that's good about high school athletics. Nothing I write could possibly ease this terrible pain. May God bless the Mosby family, and be with those who are struggling with this tragedy.

Unfortunate

2005-12-30T11:42:00.000-06:00

Like most of you, I read about the apparent demise of AM 790 as a sports station in today's Commercial Appeal. I just felt like it would be appropriate here to say that a lot of those guys over there are acquaintances of mine, and I am sad to hear that they have lost their jobs, especially at this time of year.

Radio can be a cruel business in that sense. You typically do not get any notice when you are fired, and the termination is immediate. It happened to me once. 30 minutes after doing a show, I was gone. No notice, no nothing. Just fired. When people are still paying off Christmas/Hanukkah gifts and trying to spend the holidays with family and friends, it is especially difficult to find out you've lost your job.

Professionally, I suppose it is beneficial to have one less competitor in a market, but that doesn't mean any of us at Sports 56 have any desire at all for anyone else to lose their jobs.

To Matt, Dave, Forrest, Jeff -- You are all great guys, and I respect each of your work. I wish you guys all the best in your future endeavors, whatever they may be.

World Cup Finals Draw (with Incredibly Early Predictions!)

2005-12-09T16:06:00.000-06:00

The World Cup Finals draw just wrapped up about an hour ago, and I've had enough time to sit back and analyze what just took place. Here's my first reaction: the United States just got screwed. I don't know if there's any other way to put it, because that is precisely what has happened.

The draw in full, with predictions (in bold):

Group A
Germany
Costa Rica
Poland
Ecuador

Group B
England
Paraguay
Trinidad & Tobago
Sweden

Group C
Argentina
Cote d'Ivoire
The Netherlands
Serbia & Montenegro

Group D
Mexico
Iran
Angola
Portugal

Group E
Italy
Ghana
United States
Czech Republic

Group F
Brazil
Croatia
Australia
Japan

Group G
France
Switzerland
South Korea
Togo

Group H
Spain
Ukraine
Tunisia
Saudi Arabia

Round of 16:
Germany vs. Sweden
Argentina vs. Mexico
Italy vs. Croatia
France vs. Ukraine
England vs. Poland
The Netherlands vs. Portugal
Brazil vs. Czech Republic
Spain vs. South Korea

Quarterfinals:
Germany vs. Argentina
Italy vs. France
England vs. The Netherlands
Brazil vs. Spain

Semifinals:
Italy vs. Argentina
Brazil vs. England

Final:
Brazil vs. Argentina

Groups Ranked by Difficulty
1. Group C
2. Group E
3. Group F
4. Group B
5. Group A
6. Group D
7. Group G
8. Group H

For those of you wondering, the U.S. will play the Czech Republic first, on June 12th in Gelsenkirchen (a hugely important match), then Italy five days later in Kaiserslautern, and end with Ghana on the 22nd in Nuremburg.

All three of the teams drawn with the U.S. in Group E are very difficult, even Ghana. Ghana's midfield tandem of Michael Essien (Chelsea) and Stephan Appiah (formerly of Juventus, now of Fenerbahce) will give the Americans fits. Italy's strengths go without saying, and the Czech Republic, while not quite the force they once were, can still call on the services of players like Thomas Rosicky (Borussia Dortmund), Pavel Nedved (Juventus), and GK Petr Cech (Chelsea). It will be tough to get even three points from this group. Bruce Arena's got a real job on his hands now, but I certainly with them all the luck in the world. If they do advance, the United States will fear no one remaining in the tournament, that much I can tell you.

As the World Cup Finals approach, I will have complete coverage right here on the blog, so those of you into soccer, you know where to go. Of course, Richie Grant and I will have a full breakdown of the World Cup draw on this coming Wednesday's Soccer Fix at 10 am on Sports 56 WHBQ.

When all is said and done, Brazil will win, because they have too much talent not to.

TCB

2005-12-06T08:24:00.000-06:00

I hope you all enjoyed my Elisha Cuthbert appreciation. It's clearly my greatest post.

The Grizzlies take on NOOCH (again, thanks to the always-informative and highly entertaining Deadspin for that acronym) tonight down at the Forum. In case you haven't noticed (and judging by the lackluster attendance at Grizzlies games thus far, some of you haven't), the Grizzlies are currently the second-best team in the Western Conference. It is truly remarkable what they have been able to do through the first 17 games of this season. Here are some highlights:

Over the last four games, they're averaging 32.5 points in the 1st quarter, while allowing just 18.
They are by far the best defensive team in the NBA, allowing just 85.5 points per game.
In Hubie Brown's favorite stat, point differential (the difference between points scored and points allowed), the Grizzlies are third, behind only Detroit and San Antonio.
They're 12-5 despite the NBA's second-worst FT shooting percentage, and lackluster assist numbers.
Previous records through 17 games: '04-'05 - (6-11); '03-'04 - (9-8); '02-'03 - (2-15); '01-'02 - (4-13)
The Grizzlies have already won 7 road games this season; the earliest date they've gotten to 7 road wins before this season was January 6th of last season.

I hope people aren't taking this for granted; this team finally seems to have turned a corner and is playing with all the confidence in the world. In previous seasons, even when the team was playing well, sometimes they would have a hard time with confidence and belief. They would routinely lose to teams they shouldn't have lost to, and they certainly would not win too many tough games on the road.

This year, things are totally different. With the acquisition of the veterans (you know who they are by now), the climate of the team has changed. All of these guys are winners, all of them have won playoff games and series before, and their confidence and professionalism is wearing off on everyone, especially Pau Gasol. Pau's numbers are up across the board, but the one I want to focus on is assists. Pau's more aggressive on offense, which had led to him getting double-teamed much more often. He's responded by passing beautifully out of the double-team and finding the open man. This team is making those open shots with ease. However, make no mistake: the reason those shots are so incredibly open is Pau Gasol.

I see no reason why this cannot continue. The Grizzlies still have a lot of room for improvement. Brian Cardinal is still out; his return will help shore up the frontline a little bit and ease some of the strain on the rotation. For all of the criticism, some of it definitely deserved, that Cardinal has gotten after signing his big free agent deal with the Grizzlies and producing very little, we must not forget he's been hampered by injuries and has never quite been at 100%. If he can return to 100%, or at least get close, he will be a big factor this season.

So, where are the fans? We talked about this on this morning's show--the fans just don't seem to be responding to the Grizzlies' great start. Why?

1. Ticket prices are high

I think price is always a consideration--NBA basketball is a pretty expensive sport to watch, and disposable income levels in the Memphis area aren't very high at the moment, especially given the high gas prices and high heating costs this winter. Here's the bad part: not much can be done about this; the franchise isn't profitable as it is, and lowering prices isn't likely to make the bottom line better. So, on this note, we'll have to hope people are willing to pay.

2. The team isn't exciting

If this is your beef, and I heard this one more often before the season started than I hear it now, then you aren't a basketball fan. This team is a joy to watch when it's clicking. They pass the ball exceptionally well as a team, move the ball quickly on offense, play stifling defense, and shoot the ball well from the outside. They also have made a habit out of kicking the other team's ass in the first quarter. If that's not exciting, I don't know what is.

3. The gameday experience isn't much fun

This we can work on. The fact of the matter is that it's just not all that much fun to go to a Grizzlies game, at least as far as the gamenight experience as a whole is concerned. The dancers need to get more involved, and get a little bit sexier and edgier; the breaks in the action need to filled with higher energy, and most importantly, NEWER stunts/games, etc; and they need to put more of a Memphis stamp on the gameday experience. Things are so generic and cookie-cutter right now that there's nothing to excite the fans enough to get up and cheer. We've seen the smooch-cam, we've seen the Mazola Moves Dance thing, we've seen the packages drop from the roof of the arena -- it's all been done, and almost nothing that's done in the arena makes anyone excited.

Guess what: the fans are bored. And they're quiet.

The upper deck is the only place where fans even get a little bit rowdy consistently -- those guys can get loud and excited at times. The rest of the arena is like a mausoleum. We need to see some innovation and some originality from the Grizzlies gamenight folks to wake up the crowd. The Grizzlies team itself would respond better with a more excitable crowd. The games need to be an event unto themselves, something that you go home and tell everyone about. There has to be something unique about the arena experience to motivate people to spend their cash and actually show up; they can (almost always) watch the actual game on TV for free and never leave their couch.

In that vein, here are some ideas to help make the gamenight experience better:

Grizz needs to actually interact with the crowd much more often and in much better ways
The music needs to actually change from time to time (we've heard the same songs over and over)
The music has to improve; it's very generic at the moment
The dance team has to get sexier
Change up the events that happen in the arena (including the order)
Do stunts/skits associated with the opponent (that are funny/exciting/interactive)
Increase fan interaction in general
Do we really need both a T-shirt gun AND a t-shirt slingshot AND t-shirts dropping from the sky on parachutes AND Grizz and the dancers driving around throwing T-shirts to fans? How many more ways are there to dispense T-shirts? Should they add a T-shirt cannon? A T-shirt crossbow, perhaps? How about a T-shirt catapult?

I should point out that the skits need to actually have a punchline, as well. For example, on Friday, the Orlando Magic were in town. They decided to have Grizz dress up as a magician and do a trick during one of the stoppages in play. OK, fine. However, all Grizz did was actually do a regular magic trick ("cutting" a dance team member in half); there was no punch line or clever twist at all. And the crowd yawned, because there was no reason to do anything else. It wasn't clever or exciting in any way. Creativity must improve.

One other thing: the Kings of the Court are very, very annoying. I'm sure there's someone out there who likes them, but I haven't met that person yet. I can only speak for myself, but as a native Memphian, I'm sick of the whole Elvis thing in general. Yes, yes, we're Memphis, and yes, it's Elvis...we know. He lived here. Check. Got it. What do the Kings of the Court do exactly? Why do they need to be dressed as Elvis? Leave the Elvis impersonations to Vegas lounge singers and opposition teams when the Grizzlies come to town. It gets old, and, to me, it just shows that the Grizzlies management still has yet to fully connect with the city of Memphis.

The people behind the scenes at FedExForum are good people. They work hard. I just want to see their hard work go into something that fans will get behind, not ignore.

One huge positive for the Grizzlies: they do a lot of good charity work and have helped this area out tremendously. They are a team full of professional and genuine guys, and the ownership takes philanthropy seriously. That is a credit to them and a boon to the city and county. Tonight's single-game ticket proceeds will go to Hurricane Katrina relief efforts. Excellent work.

Grizzlies win tonight 105-87, by the way.

Quick Hits:

Colorado coach Gary Barnett's got cojones for asking for a contract extension after losing his last two ballgames by a combined score of 100-6. Proper timing and intelligent speaking are not Gary's strong points at all -- just ask Katie Hneida.

Speaking of Colorado, it was awfully generous of them and UCLA to lay down and get embarrassed against Texas and USC respectively. Goodness. How sad is the Big 12 North, anyway? That was the BEST team? Really?

Rashard Lewis, remember Bobby Phills next time you want to race down the interstate.

Congratulations to Jermain Taylor for successfully defending his middleweight championship; yeah, it was controversial and it was close, but Hopkins simply didn't do enough to dethrone Taylor. Taylor is flawed and still raw, but he's a star in the making.

This is one of the most unintentionally funny ideas I've seen in a while (thank you again, Deadspin). If you have Erick Dampier's voice as your ringtone, you are officially a very sick person. I have two questions: 1) What does Dirk Nowitzki's ringtone mean? 2) Has ANYONE EVER downloaded Josh Powell's tone? I would love it, absolutely love it, if the Grizzlies did this. Sign me up for a Jake Tsakalidis ringtone right now.

Duke = 1980's "Nature Boy" Ric Flair. Yeah, they're the best team in the nation right now, but, like the Nature Boy, they will use every trick in the book to win. They get every call from the officials, they get all the love from the announcers, and they almost always manage to win. I think I saw Mike Krzyzyzewski pull a chain out of his trunks last weekend. J. J. Redick threw powder at Shawne Williams during the Duke/Memphis game. But somehow, Duke wins, even if it takes a freaking Sean Dockery halfcourt shot. However, unlike Ric Flair, I hate Duke. Whooooooo!!

I know this is late, but RIP Eddie Guerrero. He was one of my all-time favorites. I hope the WWE is serious about their implementation of random drug-testing, because it is sorely needed. Too many have needlessly died.

Here's a quick ranking of local weather coverage:

1. News Channel 3 (Tremendous team; perhaps too much talent)
2. ABC 24/UPN 30 (Brian Teigland is at times bizarre, but entertaining)
3. Action News 5 (Dave Brown is a legend; the young guys are struggling)
4. Fox 13 (Joey Sulipeck. Bowtie. Annoying.)

Be sure to check out Georgelapides.com soon...(the Tigers' "name game" is delightful!)

Happy Birthday, Elisha

2005-11-30T11:08:00.000-06:00

Beautiful actress (and hockey fan) Elisha Cuthbert turns 23 today.

In her honor, I have written a haiku:

Just look at that girl
Elisha, you're amazing
Why are you engaged?

Elisha, if you ever break up (and far be it from me to wish that on anyone except you), you know where to go. Daddy's here.

A Big Friday Night

2005-11-25T09:10:00.000-06:00

Are you watching the Tigers take on Duke in the NIT Tip-Off Classic (or, as America still likes to call it, the Preseason NIT), or are you heading down to the Forum to watch the Grizzlies against Houston?

I'll be at the Forum, but one eye will certainly be on events in NYC. I couldn't be more impressed by the way the Memphis basketball team has begun its season. So many young players, but are those young players ever filled with energy and talent...it can be frightening to watch when they are in full flight. Obviously, there are stretches of time when they are taking bad shots and going altogether too fast, but those have been far fewer in number than any reasonable person could expect.

Merely by making it this far in this tournament, the Tigers have done their NCAA Tournament seeding a world of good. Wins over Wisconsin-Milwaukee (not a bad team at all), and two ranked opponents away from home (at Alabama, and UCLA on a neutral court) instantly bump up the team's RPI and national exposure. Merely playing Duke will cause the RPI to shoot up, as well. Games against Texas and Gonzaga await this team later this year, so strength of schedule should not be an issue come March (despite the embarrasing futility of C-USA as a basketball conference).

There is no doubt that this is as talented a team as Memphis has ever had. The question remains: will this be the best team Memphis has ever had? Tonight, we'll see how they handle the biggest test they can face right now: the evil, odious Duke, led by rat-faced tyrant Mike Krzyzewski.

As an aside, I don't know if I say it enough, but I really do hate Duke and Krzyzyzyzyzyzweswski. It is compounded by the fact that nut-hugging shill Dickie V is on the call tonight. Goodness. You will need a fire hose tonight to keep Vitale from actually kissing Krzyzewski on the mouth. The screaming about Duke's tradition and coaching and atmosphere and diaper dandies and Cameron crazies and pounding the floor and Christian Laettner and whatever else Vitale will spew tonight is going to make at least one person destroy their television.

The worst part about Duke is the facade Krzyzewski keeps up -- supposedly all class, but he's every bit the bully Bobby Knight (his mentor) is. Krzyzewski just does it behind closed doors. Duke is a fine school with a beautiful campus and a successful basketball team...we don't need to give them any more hype/publicity, etc. than they already get. So, essentially, shut up, Vitale and ESPN.

And lest you think the feeling isn't mutual, look at the picture on Coach K's "friend" portion of his website:

Speaking of his website, Coach K's quotes page sucks, as well. It's full of garbage quotes. Let's take a look at some:

“When you first assemble a group, it’s not a team right off the bat. It’s only a collection of individuals.”

(Wow. Startling insight, Mike.)

"Confrontation is good. It simply means meeting the truth head on."

“Confrontation simply means meeting the truth head-on.”

(Yes, those are two separate quotes. Apparently, repetition is also important. You'll see this theme again later.)

“Visualize a wagon wheel as a complete team. A leader might be the hub of the wheel at the center. Now suppose the spokes are the connecting relationships the leader is building with people on the outer rim of the wheel. If the hub is removed, then the entire wheel collapses. In a situation like that, if a team loses the leader, the entire team collapses.”

(What the hell? Not exactly a wordsmith there.)

“In leadership, there are no words more important than trust. In any organization, trust must be developed among every member of the team if success is going to be achieved.”

(Trust is only one word, Mike.)

“Throughout the season, I look into my players’ eyes to gauge feelings, confidence levels, and to establish instant trust.”

(Instant trust? I thought you just said it had to be developed, Mike.)

“Believe that the loose ball that you are chasing has your name on it.”

(This works great for the Spalding family, less so for everyone else.)

“Your heart has to be in whatever you lead. It became apparent that this decision was somewhat easier to make because you have to follow your heart and lead with it and Duke has always taken up my whole heart… The allure of coaching in college has no price. It’s one of those priceless things. I’ve never made a decision based on what will get me the most money. It was what was going to give me the most happiness and I’ve been really happy and fulfilled at Duke.”

“I have never made a decision based on what will get me the most money. To me, it’s about what was going to give me the most happiness. I have been really happy at Duke and fulfilled at Duke.”

(Those two are literally back to back on the page. Again. That's just lazy, Mike. At least give us some original crap quotes.)

"The key to successful coaching is to NEVER, EVER play a non-conference road game against a team that's worth a crap. And I recommend you scream at your players a lot, but do it away from cameras, so you can keep your facade intact. A 'back injury' during a bad season can erase a few tough losses, too."

(All right, so I made this one up. But I bet he's thought that before.)

So, as we can see, he's an overrated coach, a terrible quote, and he's got a loudmouth honk singing his praises constantly. Why would anyone cheer for Duke? That's like cheering for pure hate.

Tigers win tonight, 90-85.

The Memphis Morning QB (thanks to Peter King)

2005-11-22T08:34:00.000-06:00

MEMPHIS -- Folks, I love this kid. I really do.

It's a typically fall day in Memphis; leaves rustling, crisp air punctured by the sound of a local field hockey team playing (go Mary-Katherine!). So why am I inside? Well, only one blinding, brilliant flash of brilliance, only one transcendent tower of terrifying talent would force me inside on a day like this.

DeAngelo.

Williams.

Folks.

I was driving away from the Athletic Office Building on the University of Memphis campus, headed for a local coffee shop. No prizes for guessing which one. (It's Starbucks.) I started thinking about the rough-and-tumble nature of the Tigers' win over Southern Miss in Hattiesburg this weekend. It reminded me why I love this game. Of college football.

I am what you might call a traditionalist. Not in the Knute Rockne mold necessarily, but I appreciate all the little things a running back does. Or used to do, right? Wrong. Not anymore.

Not with DeAngelo on the prowl. He's fun and flashy, with enough dirt under his nails to tell you he's a worker, too. He's everything most people aspire to be. (Except Tom Brady or Bill Belichick -- DeAngelo, like all of us, aspires to be them)

A few weeks ago, I was talking with my colleague Ron Tillery, who, by the way, is a heck of a great guy and quite a snappy dresser, and he told me, "Peter, you can't believe how special this young man truly is." And I told him, "Yes, I can." He said, "No, I don't believe you can." I said, "Hold on, I just spilled my $4.50 venti double espresso with a shot of soy milk and extra foam on my groin." And so it went. Two grown men, one with coffee-stained slacks, arguing over the brilliance on one player and its comprehension. Who else could cause this?

DeAngelo.

He's the all-time NCAA all-purpose yards leader, you know. That ain't bad. Folks, he's the greatest player to ever wear the blue and gray of Memphis. So, why's he talking about Mo Avery?

He's that humble. Mo Avery is his teammate, but more importantly, his friend. DeAngelo and Mo always joke around in the huddle during the games--DeAngelo told a funny story about Mo:

"Mo says some crazy stuff in the huddle. I don't even think I can repeat some of it--one time, he, uh, he was calling a play, then all of a sudden, he goes, 'Hey, look at that fat girl!' He's crazy."

Crazy like a fox. And DeAngelMo has been terrorizing defenses ever since. Yeah, I just made that up, and gang, I think it's a keeper. DeAngelMo. I think I'll get that trademarked.

Player of the Week

Do you even have to ask? Of course not. It's Tom Brady.

Coach of the Week

Tommy West, Memphis. Rock solid. Every week, his team is ready to win. Read that again -- I wrote "ready to win", not "ready to play". Remember to read closely; many times, I will cleverly change things slightly and congratulate myself for it.

Memphis Annoying Travel Note Of the Week

When I was driving down Mendenhall to visit my Sports 56 WHBQ colleagues Eli Savoie and Greg Gaston at It's Gameday, I had to sit and wait on a slow-moving train to pass not once, but twice. Once as I drove to see them, once as I drove back to my office. Come on, Burlington Northern, get your schedules fixed so I don't have to be mildly inconvenienced!

Memphis Factoid that May Interest Only Me

If you rearrage the letters in "DeAngelo Williams", you can spell this phrase: "I lead. Small ego. Win." Indeed.

Memphis Quote of the Week

"I get a little choked up when I start thinking about my last game in the Liberty Bowl."

--Memphis RB DeAngelo Williams

Me too, DeAngelo. Me too.

Stat of the Week

The University of Memphis has outscored its opponents this year in the 2nd quarter by a combined 107-56. What does that mean? You tell me.

Stat of the Week (Bonus)

With a win Saturday, Memphis would be bowl eligible. The only other team within 300 miles of Memphis to be bowl eligible? Alabama.

Saturday Prediction of the Week

As much as I respect Marshall, every Marshall, from Marshall Mathers to discount clothing store Marshall's, they will not be able to dam the waterfall of emotion or destroy the wellspring of history that we will see on Saturday. DeAngelMo will go wild.

"Hey, look at that fat girl."

Memphis, 33-2.

Got a lot to blog about, so...

2005-11-16T09:48:00.000-06:00

On DeAngelo

First of all, this whole DeAngelo situation is really unfortunate. I was as surprised as anyone that DeAngelo did not even attempt to play against Tennessee last Saturday in Neyland Stadium, I really was. I fully expected him to play and to play reasonably well against a tough Tennessee rush defense. Obviously, that did not happen.

Did DeAngelo wimp out?

To a degree, I think so. It is very hard for me to say with any certainty how injured DeAngelo truly was, as I cannot feel his specific pain. None of us can say for sure. However, I know that Tiger quarterback Maurice Avery played at what he termed 75%. He has an ankle injury that, while different from DeAngelo's, is also very painful. I know that LSU runningback Joseph Addai has an ankle injury, but went out there for 2 carries to test it out against a tough Alabama defense last Saturday. He couldn't play, but at least he tried.

DeAngelo ruled himself out.

At this point, it needs to be pointed out that this is in no way a personal attack against DeAngelo in any way. He is a friendly, outgoing young man who has been a pleasure to cover over the last few years. He does extensive charity work, represents the school and the city very well, and is a fine example for kids to idolize. He is unquestionably the best player to ever wear the blue and gray of the University of Memphis.

He just isn't the toughest.

Had DeAngelo simply gone out there for one play, received a handoff, and been unable to get any yardage due to the ankle injury, no one would have said a word. No one would have criticized him; in fact, he likely would be getting a lot of praise for his toughness and devotion to the team. That is obviously not what happened.

DeAngelo told Tommy West that he couldn't start, but that he would come off the bench. What does that mean? I would be shocked if Tommy West had heard a comment like that before from one of his starters. This isn't basketball or even baseball, where a bench role is more defined. In football, you either can play, or you can't. By saying he wanted to come off the bench, he was more or less saying that he didn't think he could play.

Even if you take it at face value that he did want to come off the bench, why didn't he bug Tommy West about it over and over until West inserted him into the game? Why didn't he badger the coaching staff at halftime about wanting to help turn the momentum back in favor of the Tigers? If he could have played, knowing what a competitor he usually is, I think he would have done that.

DeAngelo says Tommy had something to do with holding him out; Tommy says he doesn't hold players out. I don't know necessarily who's right or wrong. I do agree that Tommy's comments after the game, while appropriate and honest, helped to blow this story up into the firestorm it has ended up being over the last few days. (Tommy's comments can be found here, by the way.) I will not criticize him for those comments because I appreciate the honesty -- in the media, we have a tendency to rip people for giving us stock, generic answers, yet we rip someone for being too honest when they don't. If Tommy was being honest and fair (and certainly candid), and I think he was, I'll leave Tommy's comments alone.

I simply wish DeAngelo had tried to play. Maybe he was thinking about his per-game stats, which would have been adversely affected by just playing one or two snaps. Maybe he was concerned that UT would injure him further. Maybe he's hidden how hurt he really is. I don't know. I just wish he had tried it. This discussion would be over if he had.

The best player in Memphis history just isn't the toughest. That's OK.

On the Grizzlies

This schedule pretty much sucks. Tonight, they begin another three-game road trip after having just gotten back from one. Essentially, this has been a seven-game road trip, because coming back for one game, then heading out for three more basically turns your home court into part of a road trip.

Watching the Grizzlies take on the Lakers on Monday night a few things came to mind, and I'll tackle the non-basketball issues first.

1. The game atmosphere at the Forum needs to get better. I'd love to see a few new wrinkles thrown in to the regular rotation of Dance-cam, Smooch-cam, t-shirt cannon, t-shirt slingshot, Grizz skit, and so on. It's played out. It's staid. The music is the same, the skits are the same, Grizz does the same stuff as last year -- the only real difference is that the dance team has gotten better. You might have noticed Eddie Jones during the Cleveland game exhorting the crowd to cheer and scream, because the Grizz fans just aren't all that loud yet. Very rarely do the fans try to get behind the team and act crazy. Hopefully they'll start, because the games are much more fun when people do.

2. You knew they'd bring out the big guns for the halftime show of the Lakers game, and they did...UNICYCLE BOWL LADY (UBL) was in the house. In case you haven't seen UBL do her thing, it's bizarre and compelling. She gets on this big-ass unicycle, balances bowls on her leg, and kicks them up to land on her head as she unicycles! How does one acquire such a talent? Is it genetic? Do you just know you've got it? UBL is gifted beyond belief. However, she did something I've never before seen her do on Monday night.

She dropped a bowl.

Jaws dropped. Babies cried. Mothers wept. People shielded their eyes in shock and horror. I've never seen that happen before. I wiped away a solitary tear as I saw it. It was just wrong.

Updated Halftime Show Rankings (as of 11/14):

1. Balagan (11/2; Heat)
2. Unicycle Bowl Lady (11/14; Lakers)
3. Bucket Boys/Beale Street Flippers (11/5; Cavs)

NR Kids playing basketball (11/8; Sonics)

3. Mike Miller's gone from looking awfully feminine with his Nancy headband to looking like a kid in a bad Olan Mills family photo with his new feathered haircut. Just shave it off.

Now, on the court...

1. The front line has to exert more consistent effort on the boards. Has to. Lorenzen has not been getting in done on a night-in, night-out basis on the boards; Zaza Pachulia outworked him and everyone else on Saturday night as the Hawks almost beat the Grizzlies. Pau's not been consistent in that area, either, lest you think my Pau fandom has blinded me from that truth. There's a reason Lawrence Roberts has been playing much more than Hakim Warrick -- he fills a position of need with effort and desire. The team needs that more than a 'tweener 3/4.

2. I don't know how long Eddie Jones can keep it up, but long may he try. He's been absolutely immense for this team through the first eight ballgames, and his versatility, defensive prowess, and shooting have been critically important. Shane Battier deserves a mention here as well; he's been playing well in the starting 3 role, and has been rebounding and scoring more than the norm. He seems much more comfortable offensively, and has actually been aggressive in taking shots. Those two, along with Dahntay Jones, really helped to shut Kobe Bryant down Monday night. Kobe was a non-factor for large stretches of the game thanks to being denied the ball and being forced to take tough shots.

2a. Apart from Kobe and Lamar Odom, the Lakers pretty much blow. Sasha Vujacic, Kwame Bust, er, Brown, Devin Green, Laron Profit -- these are all names that played good minutes on Monday. With that type of talent, Kobe better take 30 shots a night, and Odom should take 20. The Lakers will struggle to get to the 8th seed in the West.

3. Despite some problems and some issues, the Grizzlies are 5-3 to start the season. That's not bad. It could easily be 6-2 had they closed out Boston the way they should have. It the Grizzlies can be at or above .500 after 16 games of the season, knowing how difficult the schedule has been, I'll be very encouraged about their chances to win 45-50 games and make it to the playoffs.

On Tiger Basketball

This team is crazy talented. Crazy. The athleticism they display is stupid. They've got to gel and mature, but this could be the most talented Tiger team ever. Ever. I don't say that lightly. Kareem Cooper has the potential to be utterly dominant on the inside; Shawne Williams has NBA written all over him; Darius Washington is bigger and better than last year; and, hell, I haven't even mentioned the preseason Conference USA Player of the Year Rodney Carney yet (he came off the bench last night).

Their length, strength, depth, and speed is going to be hard for anyone to handle. They can move 8-10 guys in and out all the time, making them fresher than any of their opponents could hope to be. They will not lose more than one conference game. Defensively, they put on a clinic last night, and it was their first regular season game! They held Wisconsin-Milwaukee to just 12 field goals, and 22% shooting. Those are insane numbers. They forced 19 turnovers, grabbed 11 steals, and were everywhere Milwaukee wanted to be. They were a bit too aggressive in committing fouls, but, apart from that, it's hard to find fault.

Actually, now that I think about it, it would be nice to have a commentator know the actual names of the players (hint: it's Chris Douglas-Roberts, not Roberts-Douglas), but that might be asking too much.

On soccer

Indulge me for a moment. If you don't want to read about it, just skip down to the next topic. It will be over soon.

OK, still with me? Let's go...as you know, I love the sport of soccer, and yet I can't get into MLS action at all. I feel bad about it, because I want to support the sport at home, but I don't feel connected to the league at all. It will take time for the passions and traditions of club soccer that exist elsewhere to transfer here. I hope they will. Congratulations, though, to Landon Donovan and the LA Galaxy for winning the MLS Cup.

I am cautiously optimistic about Newcastle United's fortunes as the season is progressing. I still do not rate Graeme Souness highly at all, but I can't help but admit that he has sorted out some of the locker room troubles and the squad as a whole is more talented and stable than it was a year ago. He deserves credit for that.

Michael Owen proved on Saturday when he scored two late goals to give England a 3-2 win over Argentina that he is a world-class goalscorer. He has shown that for Newcastle since his arrival, and he has continued to impress internationally. I don't quite understand why Scott Parker can't get a sniff of the England team, as I think his introduction would really be beneficial to Sven-Goran Eriksson's side. They need a holding midfielder badly to allow Lampard, Gerrard, and Beckham to have the freedom to go forward. Ledley King is not that man--he is a center back, end of discussion. Steven Gerrard is not that man, either. Scott Parker needs to be included in the World Cup squad if England are serious about their midfield.

As for Newcastle's season, they currently sit 10th in the Barclay's Premiership table, just three points behind Manchester United for fourth place. On Saturday, the season resumes with the most difficult fixture of the season: at Chelsea. Chelsea are the runaway leaders at the moment, and have all the talent in the world to go along with a stellar manager. Chelsea's likely lineup (4-5-1) would be:

----------------------------CECH---------------------------

FERREIRA------TERRY-----GALLAS-----DEL HORNO

-------------------------MAKELELE------------------------

--COLE---------------------------------------------DUFF--

---------ESSIEN---------------------LAMPARD-----------

--------------------------DROGBA--------------------------

Chelsea have such immense talent that players like Eidur Gudjohnsson, Shawn Wright-Phillips, and Wayne Bridge can be left on the bench comfortably. They play a very technical, very fast-paced style that is incredible to watch when they're on. This spearhead, "Christmas tree" formation is hard to attack because of the sheer numbers they can put forth in midfield. When you dominate the midfield, you dominate the play.

Newcastle (4-4-2) will likely look like this:

--------------------------GIVEN----------------------------

RAMAGE---BOUMSONG----BRAMBLE---BABAYARO

SOLANO--------PARKER--------EMRE---------LUQUE

--------------AMEOBI-------------OWEN----------------

The big question mark is Albert Luque. Luque's been out since August with a tear of the thigh muscle -- he's almost back to full fitness, but although Souness wants to start him badly, he may not be able to start. I still think he will start. Souness may opt to go for a defensive 4-5-1 look, with N'Zogbia replacing Luque on the left, and Luque moving into a advanced midfield area behind Owen (or, I suppose, Ameobi, but I can't imagine dropping Owen for this matchup). Shearer may start over Ameobi, depending on how the rehab of his hyetal hernia surgery went. Young defender Steven Taylor is our for 8-10 weeks with a shoulder injury he picked up in training for the England Under 21's matchup against France. That's disappointing as he had been playing exceptional soccer of late; easily Newcastle's best, most composed defender this season.

I would love to say I expect a Newcastle victory. I don't. I would love to say I expect a Newcastle draw. I don't. I hope they'll give a good performance, and I hope that Luque and Shearer will be back to full fitness so they can play at Stamford Bridge against the champions.

Edmiston's Prediction:

Chelsea 3 (Drogba, Lampard 2)
Newcastle 1 (Owen)

On other stuff

--I hate the Cowboys. Monday night pretty much sealed that. I was all excited that the Cowboys were going to lose to the terrible Eagles, and yet...McNabb turned into Neil O'Donnell, Roy Williams turned into Larry Brown, and I got pissed off.

--This new MLB steroid policy is phenomenal. 50 games for a first violation, 100 for a second, and a lifetime* ban for your third.

*lifetime ban inexplicably can be reversed later in life

The biggest news to me is that they are actually going to start testing for amphetamines, something that we have talked about on the Morning Rush extensively as a bigger problem than 'roids. I would not be surprised at all if amphetamine testing leads to a lot of players struggling with their games...these guys need something to keep them going over a 162-game season, and for some, it's "greenies". This policy may drastically alter Major League Baseball -- watch and see.

--From my new agent Drew Rosenhaus: "PETER IS BEING HONEST AND SINCERE WITH THIS BLOG! THIS IS NOT ABOUT ME, IT'S ABOUT PETER! PETER IS BEING TREATED UNFAIRLY BY SOME OF YOU WHO READ THIS BLOG! THIS IS NOT ABOUT ME! NEXT QUESTION!"

Sorry about that.

My Larry King-style closing thoughts:

--If you're not watching Family Guy, something is wrong with you.

--If you made me choose between gouging my eyes out with a fork and watching that stupid Tim McGraw segment on MNF's halftime show, I'd tell you to hand over the silverware.

--Sergei Fedorov is now a Columbus Blue Jacket. When you think hockey, you think Columbus. I don't, but you do.

--I think it's funny that no one wants to sign Latrell Sprewell.

--Dwight Howard is going to be a freak.

--The Raptors might be the worst NBA team I've seen in a long time.

--While I respect the meterological acumen of the News Channel 3 weather team, I think having Tim Simpson, Austen Onek, Jim Jaggers, and Todd Demers is too much talent on one team. I hear there's friction. It's like this year's Miami Heat squad. All the talent and all the NEXRAD Doppler COBRA VORTEX Million-Watt UltraHyperRadar Systems in the world can't help chemistry. There's only one Prompter, fellas. Which one's J-Will? Highlight below for answer.

Onek.

--This weekend is the Colts vs. the Bengals -- I'll pick the winner based on hip-hop/rap/funk-based team song: Go Colts (Shawn til' Dawn feat. Big Hit Buda) vs. Bigg Cats (Bootsy Collins). Wow. Could go either way.

Pau's Got a Set

2005-11-08T09:55:00.000-06:00

Pau Gasol seems to have finally grown a pair--that's the general consensus of most after a Gasol-led 2-1 start for the Memphis Grizzlies. Pau's got a beard, yes, but he's also averaging almost 26 points per game, along with 9 boards, 4 assists, and 3 blocks. Those are All-Star numbers any way you want to slice them. Can he keep that pace up? No, for a number of reasons, not the least of which is the fact that's he's averaging an incredible 41 minutes per game, which would shatter his previous career high by almost a full NBA quarter.

However, he is certainly better and more productive in almost every offensive area than he has been, and that bodes well for the Grizzlies. He's more confident, which has in turn led to his being more decisive. He's not hemming and hawing with the ball thus far this year--the pivot and wait, wait, wait technique of years past appears to be all but gone--and that has led to impressive offensive outputs from the big man. His touch is still superb, but his outside shot has improved, making him even more dangerous. His role in the offense is massive now, not only because he can score, but because his passing is even better than it used to be. His teammates trust him, and he trusts them, and that's been evident in the free-flowing offense so far.

Eddie Jones will not keep up his current scoring pace, but his crafty play and solid performances will be relied upon for the entire season. He, along with Mike Miller, Shane Battier, Damon Stoudamire, and Bobby Jackson, will be expected to provide dependable, accurate outside shooting. If the Grizzlies can get that, they will be a tough offense to contain, especially if the opposition gives them an opportunity to utilize Pau at the 5 and go small 1-4. Then things get fun.

Nice to see Ren back on Saturday night. He told me in the locker room that something--he didn't say what--had been weighing on his mind. His implication was that this was the reason for his poor start to the season. He said he prayed about his problem, felt better and more relaxed, and showed it with a double-double. Those will be needed this year, especially the rebounds, as the Grizzlies currently are 27th in the NBA in rebounding, with 39 per game.

Jake Tsakalidis' 3-foot hook shot that hit the SIDE OF THE BACKBOARD was simply stunning. Truly remarkable in many ways. Easily the most embarrassing shot I've seen since Ricky Davis tried to seal his triple-double many years back.

The Grizzlies have already shown the resiliency to respond to a lackluster opener with gusto, and I expect that steady mentality to exist throuhgout the year. This team won't be really high or really low until playoff time, and that should lead to fewer bad stretches like the ones we saw from time to time last season.

Halftime on Saturday night was the Bucket Boys/Beale Street Flippers. I like the Bucket Boys (they're a group of young men who basically play various buckets like drums, if you haven't seen them before), but they're not spectacular, and I've only seen the BSF 850 times in the last two seasons...this was nowhere near the levels of the freak show during halftime last Wednesday, nor was it anywhere close to the better shows of the past. Very average.

2005-06 Grizzlies Halftime Rankings:

1) Balagan (vs. Miami; 11/2/05)
2) Bucket Boys/Beale St. Flippers (vs. Cleveland; 11/6/05)

The standings will be updated with each halftime show. Try to contain your excitement.

The release of this week's AP poll once again cemented the fact that I hate college football polls. There is absolutely no reason whatsoever that a team with one loss should be ranked ahead of a team with no losses (assuming both play in D-1, reasonably tough conferences, etc.). Alabama should be ranked in one of the top three positions in the country, since they are one of three undefeated teams. It is a joke that Miami jumped them in that poll.

Too often in college football writers and pollsters are more concerned with the aesthetics of a win or a loss, as if this was some kind of art show. IT IS A GAME OF WINNING AND LOSING. Whether you lose by 1 or 100,000,000, it's still a loss, and a loss is still worse than a win. To these people, sometimes a win is a loss, and sometimes a loss is a win. For example, Notre Dame LOST AT HOME to USC 34-31, yet most people look at that game as if it was a win. Yes, it was an incredible game, and yes, they almost won, but at the end of the day, they flat out lost. Somehow, they were rewarded for losing by not dropping in the polls the week after that loss. I don't get that. Don't we still ultimately keep score in football by looking at a team's record? Meanwhile, Alabama plays like crap, yeah, but still beats Mississippi State this weekend, and drops in the AP poll because Miami scored a huge win at Virginia Tech.

Again, here's your scoreboard:

Miami losses: 1
Alabama losses: 0.

What's the problem, AP voters?

Oh, and incidentally, who has Notre Dame beaten this season that they weren't supposed to? Winning at Michigan was unexpected, but it turns out Michigan isn't all that great this year; they've beaten Pitt (sucks), BYU (average), Washington (terrible), Tennessee (huge underachievement), and Purdue (disappointing). WOW! What an incredible season so far. They've not beaten one team they shouldn't have, and they've lost to one team they should have beaten (Michigan State) at home! I think Charlie Weis has done a great job revitalizing that program, but...has anyone considered the possibility that this team's just a tad overrated? Beat someone worth beating, and then we can talk about that 10 year extension. Charlie Weis and his agent pulled off an incredible business move: start 5-2, beat no one you shouldn't have, lose to one team at home you should have beaten, and still bank 30-40 million dollars of guaranteed money.

Speaking of (former) Patriots, that leads me to this...

I think the one thing you can't understand unless you live somewhere on the Eastern Seaboard between Washington and Boston -- or unless you once lived there -- is the intensity of a big sports event. One of the reasons players love playing here, and one of the reasons guys like Joe Gibbs get drawn back into the game magnetically, is because the games are so electric and they feel so important. I felt it Sunday night at Eagles-Redskins and I'll feel it in front of the TV tonight for Pats-Colts. So much fun. Such a gas.

That's a paragraph from this week's Monday Morning QB by Peter King, and it illustrates perfectly another reason why Peter King bothers me so much. The sheer audacity to write something as egotistical and Northeast-centric as the above passage is appalling. The above mentality is why people usually have so much of a problem with ESPN and other national outlets for their bias towards New England/Eastern Seaboard teams. But to even imply that you can't understand "the intensity of a big sports event" unless you live between Boston and Washington is ludicrous. I guess Tennessee v. Alabama last month wasn't that big or intense. I suppose Alabama v. Auburn, Florida v. Georgia, Duke v. North Carolina (in hoops), Cubs v. Cardinals, Ohio State v. Michigan, or West Coast matchups like Dodgers v. Giants or USC v. UCLA aren't as intense as Pats/Colts or Eagles/'Skins. Please. Peter King, feel free to write some more about coffee or travel or whatever other goofy crap you want to, but don't write foolish garbage like this any more.

One other thing that's been bothering me: the simulated news conferences on Sportscenter, with Steve Phillips serving as some baseball team's GM (thus far, confirming the East Coast bias mentioned above, it's been the Yankees and the Red Sox), is the stupidest idea I've seen in a long, LONG time. Almost as bad as the idea to put Rush Limbaugh on NFL Countdown.

Just do a preview of the winter if you want--don't force your reporters and hundreds of interns to sit there like a studio audience while Steve Phillips (who I think is very good) previews a team's offseason. And certainly don't present it like ESPN did on Sunday night, with terms like "breaking news" and "we'll go live to the news conference" when it isn't even real. How much do you think it irritates ESPN's crew of reporters to have to spoon-feed questions to a collegaue in the middle of a fake news conference when they could be, you know, doing their actual newsgathering job?

Briefly, I have to thank Panther cheerleaders Renee and Angela for fulfilling so many of my fantasies. I would have chosen some hotter girls, and maybe put them somewhere other than a nasty bathroom stall, but other than that, well done.

Some predictable NBA notes:

• Last night, Miami's Jason Williams and Antoine Walker exchanged words and angry glares in the third quarter after a Heat play went awry.

• In the wake of Saturday's 105-100 loss in Milwaukee, veteran point guard Gary Payton questioned some of the offensive tactics of coach Stan Van Gundy. "If I was the coach, I would do it a different way," Payton said after the Heat dropped to 1-2.

Shocking.

Shaq, Pau, and a Three-Headed Magician

2005-11-03T11:20:00.000-06:00

Heat 97 Grizzlies 78 (Griz record: 0-1)

Another season opener, another loss for the Grizzlies, as a rather unfortunate trend is in full bloom--the Grizzlies simply cannot win a home opener in Memphis. Of course, this is much different than last year's incredible embarrassment in losing to the Wizards on Opening Night, but the Grizzlies are 0-1 once more all the same.

On Court:

Pau Gasol played very well last night, finishing with 26 points and 12 rebounds, to go along with 4 assists and 3 blocks. A stat-stuffing night for the Spaniard, but one in which he got little help. Pau's aggressiveness at the game's outset was striking, as he clearly suited up with one thing on his mind: to start proving his critics wrong. He showed persistence on the boards (6 offensive rebounds), and a refreshing willingness to take on Shaq and Alonzo Mourning in one-on-one situations when it was asked of him. He won't face a more imposing big man tandem all season. Pau disappeared a little in the second half, but I think it was more a function of quick shots taken out of rhythm by some of the perimeter players. The offense wasn't in its normal flow in the second half, and Pau's numbers suffered as a result.

Speaking of which, it's obviously a concern when your three new backcourt players shoot a bricktastic 11-37 combined from the field. Yikes. Damon Stoudamire, Eddie Jones, and Bobby Jackson were not in any kind of flow. The shots looked a little forced, especially with Bobby Jackson (7 FG attempts in 15 minutes of play), and as a result, the offense didn't look right at all. The team panicked when Miami started effectively utilizing the transition game in the third quarter, highlighted by a 17-2 run that saw Miami grab the game by the throat. You would expect that we won't see another shooting night like we saw last night from those three. Perhaps one or even two will be off, but for all three to be off simultaneously hopefully won't happen again. If it does, you can expect a similar score.

Mike Miller off the bench seems to work well--he came in red-hot and it gave the team a spark. Good teams seem to have a difference-maker stowed away on the bench. I like the option of starting Battier and bringing in Mike--let's see how it works over the next few games.

When everyone in the arena knew the Grizzlies lacked energy and spark in the second half, I think most of us expected to see first-round draft pick Hakim Warrick in the game to inject some life into things. It didn't happen (until garbage time). I don't understand why Warrick was left on the bench--he has shown some decent signs in the preseason, and he would have certainly brought energy, even if it would have been of the nervous kind. Was it really that risky to put him in? Maybe we'll see more Hakim vs. Orlando tomorrow night.

Lorenzen, where were you last night?

Please don't forget that the Heat are a really good team. I know it's tempting to freak out and get all crazy over the bad performance last night, but this is nothing like last year's shocking loss to the Wizards. That Wizards team had 8 active players, and people like Michael Ruffin, Peter John Ramos, Jared Jeffries, and Juan Dixon killed the Griz. This year, it was Dwyane Wade, Antoine Walker, and Shaq. Big difference. The Heat are expected to at least make it to the Eastern Conference Finals this season, and are one of the few teams that can realistically compete with San Antonio for the title. Let's keep this in perspective, please.

Shaq looked fine--he never seems to do a whole lot against the Grizzlies, while Antoine Walker ALWAYS kills the Grizzlies. No matter who he plays for, he just dominates against the Griz.

Walker's Lines vs. MEM:

12/23/01 (w/BOS): 24 pts, 11 reb, 4 asst, 2 stl
3/15/02 (w/BOS): 38 pts, 7 reb, 6 asst, 4 stl (including a 60-foot 3 at the buzzer
12/31/02 (w/BOS): 33 pts, 11 reb, 6 asst, 3 stl
3/3/03 (w/BOS): 17 pts, 14 reb, 6 asst, 1 stl
11/15/03 (w/DAL): 15 pts, 10 reb, 6 asst
12/27/03 (w/DAL): 13 pts, 10 reb, 8 asst, 2 stl, 2 blk
2/17/04 (w/DAL): 6 pts, 8 reb, 3 asst, 2 blk (26 minutes)
4/13/04 (w/DAL): 8 pts, 7 reb, 9 asst, 4 stl, 1 blk
12/8/04 (w/ATL): 31 pts, 9 reb, 1 stl
1/29/05 (w/ATL): 17 pts, 8 reb, 3 asst, 1 stl, 1 blk
11/2/05 (w/MIA): 25 pts, 16 reb, 4 asst, 1 blk

OVERALL AVERAGES v. MEM: 20.6 pts, 10 reb, 5 asst, 1.6 stl

Damn. He always presents such a difficult challenge for the Grizzlies because of his size and versatility. The only time he really didn't hurt the Grizzlies much was during his time with Dallas, when he was coming off the bench and only playing 25 or so minutes a game. When he starts against the Grizzlies, his numbers are even better than those averages. If I have Walker on my team and I see Memphis on the schedule, he starts and plays 48 minutes.

Dwyane Wade is every bit as good as LeBron James.

Off Court:

For starters, although Ron and I played a hand in Grizzlies dance team tryouts, we had nothing whatsoever to do with those gold/black 1950's-style costumes the dance team had on in the first half last night. I'm not really a fashion guy, but I've seen the girls enough to know that the stockings and granny panties made them look about 20 lbs. heavier apiece. It is my hope that we never see those again. Hell, why don't we strap fat suits on them all? Maybe put a Depression-era one-piece swimsuit with a swimming cap on them? This isn't Barbara Stanwyck and Katharine Hepburn out there. What's wrong with a nice sports bra/spandex shorts combo? Or a schoolgirl outfit? Nothing at all. No need to put us through that again.

If you weren't there last night, you missed the Grizzly Grannies. The fans seemed to dig them, so that's good...I myself was not a fan. I don't know that we really need to see old women stripping. Wait, let me re-read what I just typed. Quick correction: I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that we never, ever need to see old women stripping. One poor woman got her shirt caught in her feather boa--but fortunately a teammate helped her get it off. That's teamwork, folks. Overall, I would say watching the Grizzly Grannies entertained me in the same way that watching a fat guy wrestling a greased pig would--yes, it's entertaining, but should it be?

Now, I feel compelled to tell you about the halftime show. It was absolute visual overload--here's a list of what comprised it (none of this is made up):

--Four (4) giant white sheets draped from the ceiling to the floor

--Four (4) women gyrating in and on said sheets as if having epileptic seizures

--One (1) giant red sheet from the ceiling to the floor

--One (1) shirtless dude flopping around on the red sheet as if ill

--One (1) guy in blue spandex costume on a bungee wire doing random spastic flips

--Two (2) women in sequined gymnastic suits twirling metal rods

--One (1) three-faced giant, complete with massive cape and flowing robe, on stilts wandering around aimlessly with a giant scepter, presumably casting some sort of "spell" on the group

--One (1) shirtless, dirty man inside an enormous wireframe cube (it would appear to have been a "prison"), which he eventually lifted up and twirled as if some sort of New-Age Harlem Globetrotter, only with a giant metal cube instead of a basketball

Now, imagine if you will all of those pieces moving and thrashing about to some sort of funereal, bizarre music for about 5 minutes or so, and you've got yourself a halftime show. Oh, there was one other aspect of the show I forgot to mention:

--Eighteen thousand one-hundred nineteen (18,119) confused spectators

I think I was impressed. Or frightened. Either way, it was better than Leg Strength Guy or Unicycle Bowls Lady, and right up there with Quick Change. I'll be interested to see what they've got in store for Saturday. Perhaps I'll rank the halftime shows as the season progresses.

No scoreboards in the first half--that wasn't too great.

My cell phone wallpaper is now a picture of me and funk legend Bootsy Collins backstage at the Grizzlies game last night. Alonzo Mourning told Bootsy, "Keep the funk alive!" Also, Dwyane Wade and Shaq took time to show respect to Bootsy before heading out. Words cannot describe the clothing Bootsy had on. It looked like a kaleidoscope threw up on a homeless man.

I should also point out that Dwyane Wade and Shaq both were very gracious and kind to the huge number of fans that showed up to greet them after the game. Both of those guys are real ambassadors for the league, and epitomize the behavior that David Stern should emphasize in the league, regardless of dress code.

By the way, this is hilarious.

Peter Edmiston's Peter King's Monday Morning QB

2005-10-31T10:45:00.000-06:00

FOXBORO, Mass -- Folks, let me tell you something right now: I don't like hyperbole. Never have, never will. It's simply not in my nature. But last night, in Gillette Stadium, in beautiful Boston, just 2.5 miles from at least 4 different Starbucks locations, I saw the sheer greatness of one dynasty elevated to levels unseen. I watched as Tedy Bruschi strode onto the field like a colossus and proceeded to exhibit the most courageous performance in human history.

KING'S LIST OF HISTORY's MOST COURAGEOUS MEN:

1. Tedy Bruschi
2. Bill Belichick
3. Tom Brady
4. Martin Luther King, Jr.
5. Tedy Bruschi

It would not be an exaggeration to say that my jaw quite literally dropped to the cold Boston ground as I came to grips with the enormity of what I saw. Truly there are men, and then there's Tedy Bruschi.

A humble man for one so great--he told me before the game as I polished his shoes, "Who's the hell is this at my feet? Oh, it's just you Peter, go ahead." What a leader. What a man.

Would that my daughter, or even my son (not that there's anything wrong with that) could be with Bruschi. What a lucky woman Jennifer, his beautiful (and, frankly, meddlesome) wife is. She sees the legend at his finest, and at his most intimate times, the times when the beast inside tames into a purring kitten.

KING'S LIST OF HISTORY'S GREATEST ACCOMPLISHMENTS:

1. Tedy Bruschi's comeback
2. Tedy Bruschi's first tackle vs. Buffalo
3. Invention of the wheel
4. Development of written language
5. Tom Brady's third Super Bowl title

Other receiving votes: development of government, man walking on the moon, construction of Great Wall of China, curing of polio/smallpox, Bill Belichick's decision to draft Tom Brady

FACTOID THAT MAY INTEREST ONLY ME:

Tedy Bruschi's eyes have the same regal yet terrifying glow of many of history's most feared leaders, including Alexander the Great, Ivan the Terrible, and Rasputin. Yet Bruschi is so kind. Dare I say even a Tedy bear?

AGGRAVATING/ENJOYABLE TRAVEL NOTE OF THE WEEK:

I recently had to walk almost 1/8th of a mile to find a Starbucks location, since the airline thoughlessly did not serve the rich, dark goodness of Starbucks on the plane itself. However, all was vindicated when I saw Tedy Bruschi himself in the Starbucks! Well, turns out it was just a guy that looked like Bruschi, but I still had to change my Sansabelt slacks.

GRIPE OF THE WEEK:

Why didn't ESPN devote more time to Tedy's remarkable story and incredible game? Was I the only one who knew about this story? There were actually times during last night's telecast, folks, where Mike Patrick, Joe Theismann, and Paul Maguire (who are typically not at all annoying) actually talked about the Buffalo Bills! Gang, this isn't about the Bills, this is about one incredible demigod and those that dare to reach his level. His name is Bruschi, and ESPN dropped the ball by covering Buffalo for such a long period of time.

NUMBER OF THE WEEK:

5 minutes, 25 seconds--the amount of time in last night's 3 hour telecast ESPN talked about Buffalo; come on, Bristol, we need more Bruschi!

BOLD PREDICTION OF THE WEEK:

Tedy Bruschi will cure AIDS within three weeks.

TEAM I LIKE TONIGHT (AND I DON'T MEAN THE PATRIOTS):

Actually, I do mean the Patriots. I like the Patriots a lot.

Must-Read Tennessee Article

2005-10-31T10:34:00.000-06:00

I'll have my thoughts later, but you need to read this column by Dr. John Mark Hancock of tricitiessports.com right away to learn what's really going on at Tennessee.

To give you the gist of it, Randy Sanders is out as offensive coordinator, he will be moved to wide receivers coach to replace Pat Washington, who (thankfully) is out, as is Jimmy Ray Stephens at offensive line coach. David Cutcliffe would be back as the offensive coordinator, a move that has been in the cards for some time.

Most of these changes would be effective at the end of the season, but some may happen as soon as today.

Tuesday Thanks and Thoughts

2005-10-25T07:30:00.000-06:00

First of all, I have to thank some people who have really helped me out over the last week or so. A massive thank you goes to my neighbors Diane and Steve, who found the bag that was stolen from me last week (see post below for details) and got it back to me with absolutely nothing missing at all. They could not have been nicer and more helpful, and I thank them for doing me that service.

I also have to thank a young man by the name of T who helped me out over at Mitchell High School yesterday, where I was covering Thaddeus Young's college announcement (more on that later). I inexplicably neglected to realize that there was a concrete parking block in front of my car, and I tried to pull forward quickly out of my parking spot, because I was in a hurry. Bad idea. I dragged the long, heavy concrete block a good yard or so as I tried in vain to drive my car over it. Apparently I am an idiot. At this point, the block was lodged in my car's undercarriage, creating noises more at home in a horror movie than in a parking lot. T came over and immediately helped me drive the car in such a way as to realign the block where we could get it out from under the car. We jacked up the car and T slid the block out--he helped me get out of there in no time, despite my stupidity. I asked him if I could do anything for him in exchange for the help he had given me, and he just said, "No, it's fine." Thanks, T.

I was in Tuscaloosa last weekend for the Alabama/Tennessee game--first of all, it is always a pleasure to be in a place that loves college football on a gameday as big as that one was. There's an energy in the air that can't be described, but you know it when you feel it. We ate at Bob Baumhower's Wings restaurant the night before and I have to tell you, it was pretty good. I would recommend you try the "hot lips"--they're kind of like boneless buffalo wings, but a little smaller. The flavor was fantastic.

Before the game, we (me, Will, and Fish) saw plenty of Alabama and Tennessee fans mingling together, having a drink and talking about the game. No real bad blood was evident. The Alabama fans I spoke with were very easygoing and calm, and they were very respectful of Tennessee, which surprised me a bit. We parked a couple of miles away from Bryant-Denny, but we parked for free, which is always a bonus. A little pregame meal and beverage, throw the football around a bit, and we're off to the game.

After getting sent to literally 4 different gates by 5 different staff members, we managed to pick up our tickets outside the stadium. I can give you a very thorough description of Bryant-Denny because I walked around the entire place before the game trying to find my tickets. So I was already in a foul mood when I took my seat--and the game itself did little to make me feel much better.

I cannot imagine what goes through Phillip Fulmer's mind (Or Randy Sanders', for that matter) when the decision is made to put Erik Ainge in for one series in the first half, then pull him after that. Just when I think the quarterback travesty cannot get any worse, it does. Now that I can put it in print, let me take a stab at explaining how I feel about Tennessee's quarterbacks: I appreciate Rick Clausen's perseverance and his leadership, and I would love for other players to have the determination he does, but he is not a good enough quarterback at this level to be a success. I know the receivers are not well-coached, and I know the line could be better this year, but the fact remains that Clausen just cannot make the throws necessary to consistently win games. That said, Erik Ainge is, in the words of Jackie Sherrill yesterday with George, "a stallion that has never been broken". He's always been the best at every level, and now he's not--he has to be mentally strong enough to respond to this adversity. I don't know whether or not he will be. Right now, he's not.

Beyond that, though, it is the job of the coaching staff to put in the best personnel available to win games, and put them in the best position to succeed. And ultimately, regardless of whether Clausen or Ainge is under center, the coaching staff is not doing that. Not even close. Their bungling has angered Clausen and killed Ainge's mental approach.

As I mentioned before, the wide receivers are not well coached at all. They can't beat one-on-one coverage, they don't get separation, and they can't run many deep/intermediate routes because their quarterback can't throw them. It's a joke. The worst part is that Tennessee is ruining a championship-level performance from the defense, which has stepped up and played exceptionally well this season, especially against Alabama.

Will there be changes? That's the question everyone asks me--and I have no idea. I would doubt it. Change is a foreign concept at Tennessee. Continuity is valued over innovation, status quo over fresh thinking. That's why the Walt Harris offense in place at Tennessee hasn't changed much at all over the last two decades or so. It was one thing when Tennessee had more talent than almost everyone else they played--a bruising, conservative attack can work fine in those situations (with, yes, even a little deep passing during the years the QB was solid). Now the talent gap has vanished and Tennessee is being asked to beat teams with coaching, execution, and schemes. They are not answering the bell.

As if things weren't bad enough, Gerald Riggs is out for the season. It's a microcosm of the Tennessee season--all the talent in the world, ultimately accomplishing nothing. I wish Gerald the best in his recovery, and I hope his mental approach improves if he wants to truly be great.

And, by the way, Tennessee was BEATEN on Saturday--Tennessee did not beat itself. Alabama played great on defense (people don't usually fumble unless they're hit), had a quarterback who came up with a huge play when his team needed it, and were honestly the better team. Anyone who says otherwise is fooling his- or herself.

OK, rant over. Sorry about that. I sometimes get carried away.

I've been saying it for the last few weeks, and I will write it today: GO WATCH DEANGELO WILLIAMS PLAY! You've only got two more shots to do it, and I can assure you that watching him now will cost you a lot less than it will in about a year or so. There cannot be a better ambassador for a football program than DeAngelo. I have never covered a person who combined such breathtaking talent with such a delightful personality. He's actually a funny guy in person, doesn't take himself too seriously, is a great team leader without being cocky about it, and, by the way, has a chance to become the NCAA leader in rushing yards and all-purpose yards before the end of his career. What more could you want?

I refuse to believe that only 31,000 or so people want to be a part of this historic season. I just refuse to believe it. I hope the fans of Memphis prove me right on this one. It would be an absolute shame if only 30-35 thousand people show up for the last two games of a historic career. He is the best player that has ever, and likely will ever, put on a Memphis uniform. GO WATCH HIM PLAY.

QUICK THOUGHTS:

OK, Thaddeus made his decision. Let's all just move on. How can we be surprised and act all self-righteous that a kid treats his future as a business when the entire college basketball scene is a business? Coaches make money off clothing deals, shoe deals, endorsement deals--administrators make money off ticket sales and broadcast deals, everyone cashes in but the players. And yet we're indignant when high school athletes have people around them worrying about business deals/marketing/exposure? Hypocrisy. Guess what, people--1950 ain't coming back soon. It's 2005. Money is a part of the sports world. Get over it.

Last night's Grizzlies/Magic exhibition game made me hate basketball. Look at that box score. There were 122 missed shots, including 26 missed free throws. The Grizzlies scored precisely ZERO points off the 19 Magic turnovers. Goodness. Rudy Tomjanovich, who is now scouting for the Lakers as he gets healthy again, reportedly left the game early because he just couldn't take it. One Knicks scout told me it was one of his top ten worst games ever, and he's seen tens of thousands of games at every level. As Damon Stoudamire said in the locker room last night, "I can't believe you're going to report on that (bleep)." Fair enough. Let's move on.

I still think the Grizzlies have positioned themselves well to compete, given what they had to do to get the team settled in the offseason. They've made the best of a tough situation, and I really think the defense and the guardplay will keep them afloat while they work out a lot of kinks involving chemistry and poor shooting.

Brad Lidge--wow. Sorry, man. That, uh, that sucks.

Surely THIS couldn't happen, could it? Eli Savoie would be on suicide watch.

Hail to the Redskins! Did I just imagine things or did the 'Skins score 52 points on Sunday? I don't care if it was against the horrendous 49ers--or against a high school team--whenever the Redskins can rack up 52, I'm excited. They're still tied for the lead in the NFC East--what a deep division that has turned out to be, huh? Unlike the NFC North which, frankly, sucks.

EVEN QUICKER THOUGHTS:

USC is still better than Texas.

From 10-11 every night, you should be watching Comedy Central.

Tim McCarver is still worse than Paul Maguire, but only just.

"It's Coach Martz? Send it to voicemail."

Brilliant.

Hope You Like My Notes, Jackass

2005-10-18T09:55:00.000-06:00

So I leave my house as I do most every morning--just getting ready for the show--and I go up to my car and notice that it's unlocked. That's odd. I don't typically leave it unlocked, you know. I open my unlocked door to find that someone has gone through my car and taken my briefcase. My glove compartment was left open, but they didn't take anything from it (not that there was anything of any value to take). The thief will have certainly left disappointed after going through my case, as there is virtually nothing of any significant value (unless you count cheap headphones as valuable).

That's not the point, of course. Monetarily, the value was slim. To me, and to me alone, the value was immense. I was so angry this morning I wanted to rip someone's face off. I'm still a little angry even now. There's no use worrying about it now, I suppose. I'll just have to remind the insurance company about the original Van Gogh I accidentally left in there.

Thoughts:

You can't pitch to Pujols. Even with white-hot Reggie Sanders waiting in the wings.

You can't walk Edmonds. High fastballs will get Jimmy every time.

Joe Carter > Bill Mazeroski > Kirk Gibson > Jim Leyritz > Aaron Boone > Bucky Dent > Albert Pujols

I'll be watching closely to see how Brad Lidge responds to this adversity. Will be be like Mark Wohlers and flame out, or will he be like Mariano Rivera and respond by getting even better?

I was sad to see Allan Houston retire. Not as sad as his bank in New York, but still sad.

The NBA's new dress code is ridiculous. When you go to an NBA game, you go to be entertained by your favorite team and their opponent. It is, in essence, like going to a play or a show--when the performers are on stage, then by all means, require them to be in uniform or appropriate gear. When they are backstage (or, in this case, in the locker room), who cares what they dress like? Are there not more important things for the NBA to be worried about than this? Some players dress very nicely after games without a dress code (Lorenzen Wright and Dahntay Jones spring to mind), some don't (Steve Nash and Greg Ostertag jump out at me)--but does it matter? Why take individual style out? Should we then ban dunking, or other individual displays of flair? Once players are in the locker room, let them dress as they wish. This is just stupid.

Eli Savoie ripped me this afternoon on Middays because I made the claim that I would go back to work if I won the $340 million Powerball grand prize. I can assure you I would go back to work, and I can also assure Eli Savoie that he has talked his way out of getting ANY of my money, should the unthinkably incredible event of me winning the lottery occur. You have to have something in your life that you love besides money. I'm not saying I wouldn't take an unbelievable vacation, I'm just saying I'd come back to work. Whether Savoie believes me or not.

That little David Eckstein sure is small. Hey, Dave, when you get four balls in an AB, it's called a "walk", not a "run", buddy.

If you can kick a field goal of more than 30 yards, please report to Coach Orgeron's office.

Despite what you might have heard, Patrick Willis is NOT out for the season, obviously. But he is the best defensive player in the SEC--he's playing with one hand, on a sprained MCL, and he's had 44 tackles in the last three games. No one in the nation is more important to his team than Patrick Willis. Who is, again, not out for the season.

I'll be in Tuscaloosa this weekend along with rabid Alabama fan Will Askew and "rabid" Georgia fan (and frequent blog updater) Rob Fischer. It will be an upset if me and Will don't fight by Saturday evening. I know that Will and Fish are both picking Tennessee for some reason, but, as a Tennessee fan, I can tell you I have very little confidence in them at this point. Rick Clausen isn't good enough, Erik Ainge is mentally out of it, and the team's got to raise its level immensely to have a chance against 'Bama. I don't think they can do it. Hope I'm wrong.

Can't wait for Rocky VI. I heard that Stallone is sparring with Roy Jones, Jr. to get prepared for the fight. Yeah. Good. I'm sure RJJ is giving, what, .00000000007% effort? Stallone wants Roy Jones, Jr. to play the role of, get this, Mason "The Line" Dixon, which is without a doubt the dumbest character name in the history of the movies. Once your leading man starts to have prostate problems, it sort of strains credibility for him to portray a boxer. Just a little.

Writing about Mason "The Line" Dixon has inspired me--email me if you can think of the stupidest character names in movie/TV history. I'll include them in a later update.

Keep checking out our new and improved website--we've got all kinds of audio for you to download, and we'll soon have pictures and other cool content for you to see and hear.

For those of you into rivalries, watch Fox Soccer Channel (Time Warner channel 219) this Sunday to see Newcastle take on Sunderland in the Tyne-Wear derby. You will not find a more intense sporting event (except for Alabama/Tennessee) than this. And, of course, you have to pull for Newcastle. Unless you're stupid.

Rest of my Thoughts (Larry King-style)

Is there a better snack than the Oatmeal Creme Pie, gang?

I don't know about you, but I think we've overlooked French Guiana for too long.

When it comes to coffee, cream is good, but so is half and half.

Whatever happened to Zamfir, master of the pan flute?

My wish for 2006, folks, is that we see more of Dustin Diamond.

There's never been a more satisfying 60 minutes of television than "Murder, She Wrote".

I enjoy beets.

The Grizzlies Are Back

2005-10-13T08:03:00.000-06:00

It was nice to be back in the Forum for a Grizzlies game, even if it was the first preseason game, which by all accounts is just this side of worthless. Indeed, the outcome is meaningless, but the performances were not. Here are some impressions of last night:

--First of all, can we PLEASE stop with the video presentations where the player/coach is looking at the ground, then looks up at the camera all pissed off and angry? Seriously, is there no other way to present an NBA player? Have we tried "smiling playfully, then looking at the sky" or "frowning slightly, then crying", or even "just looking straight ahead with a normal look on their face"? No, it's always looking down, then ANGRY FACE at the camera. If you haven't noticed this before, you will now.

--I echo Will Askew's sentiments about how embarrassing it is for the "Rollings Stones" and "Los Lonley Boys" to be advertised on the huge video boards on the scoreboard. "Rollings Stones"? It's not like the Stones are some two-bit local band, either. It's like saying "The Beetlez" are coming back, or advertising an "Ellton Jon" show.

--I hope this year we will see "Quick Change", "Leg Strength Guy", "Contortionist Chick", and "Unicycle Bowl Balancing Lady" all at least twice during halftime.

--We all need to take a long look in the mirror and ask ourselves if we're contributing to the downturn of the Mazola Moves Dance Hall of Fame. There's been an alarming rise in "Dancing Teenage Guy Who Lifts His Shirt" sightings, and it's just wrong. This segment should be about beautiful women, entertaining children, and fat guys embarrassing themselves. Not teenage shirt-pull-up guy.

--Always good to hear John Paul Stevenson's pipes.

--As far as the on-court performances go, I was very impressed with how well Damon Stoudamire and Eddie Jones integrated into the starting 5. The unit was very smooth, especially at the beginning of the second half, when a real commitment to defense helped the Grizzlies open up a huge lead over the Bulls. You can already see how important ball pressure and disrupting offensive flow is to these guys on defense, and it bodes well for the season.

--Pau Gasol had 11 bearded points and picked up 4 bearded rebounds in 17 bearded minutes of play. He also went to the free throw line 8 bearded times in those 17 minutes--he needs to make more than 3 bearded free throws, though.

--Bringing in Bobby Jackson off the bench is a real luxury for any team. He's a tremendous professional and a game-changer when his shot is falling, and he's always committed to playing defense. After the game, he told me that basically all they'd been working on for the last week or so was defense. It showed.

--Although there were many times where he looked out of position and confused, Hakim Warrick is going to be a lot of fun to watch this season. He had a couple of dunks that were just incredible, including one after the whistle had blown where he just exploded to the basket. He jumps so quickly--"springing" is the right term for it, I think. The problem comes because right now, he simply doesn't know whether he will be a 3 or a 4, and his court positioning can suffer because of that. It's early, though, and he'll come around.

--Antonio Burks did not look good at all. His shot was off, and he was far too aggressive on defense (he fouled out of a preseason game, for crying out loud). His decision-making was poorer than I expected too...he's going to have to get better, because he's got stiff competition for minutes at the PG position. Not necessarily from Anthony Roberson, though, because Roberson was WAY out of sorts last night. Apart from an early lay-up, he didn't give you anything.

--Kennedy Winston was better than anticipated. I don't know if the Grizzlies coaching staff expected him to perform as well as he has thus far. He's making things difficult for the coaches, which of course is not a bad problem to have.

--And where do I begin with Jake Tsakalidis? I don't necessarily blame Jake, because I know he wanted to go to Cleveland, where he would have played more, and I know he's not happy with things in Memphis. Fine. But when he entered the game, he immediately got dunked on, committed an offensive foul, then turned the ball over. All in like 2 minutes! I also would concur with a caller on our show, Aaron, who pointed out that women screamed and kids cried their eyes out when Jake Tsakalidis tried to lead the break with an "Andre the Giant-sized dribble" (which, of course, was immediately halted when a Chicago defender took the ball away). Jake isn't motivated, and right now, is a colossal waste of money.

--Playing 4 rookies and a second-year player is not a great idea, even in the preseason.

--Michael Sweetney looks and plays far too much like Robert Traylor to be any good.

--With Duhon, Hinrich, Deng, Chandler, and Gordon as a base, the Bulls are going to be solid for the next few years.

OK. Before I get out of here, I simply have to link to this (from the Signifying Nothing blog)--Coach O: "I have my Hummer, you need a Hummer--tell 'em about it, Jojo!"

It doesn't get any better.

Disappointment

2005-10-09T16:21:00.000-06:00

You can only tread water for so long before you begin to sink. And today that lesson is hitting home in resounding fashion in both Memphis and Knoxville. Despite high hopes for both the University of Memphis and the University of Tennessee, it would appear both teams will have to settle for disappointment.

Treading water at the quarterback position (whether because of injury or coaching indecision) is clearly a recipe for failure, as evidenced by both schools. For Memphis, a season of celebration--a season to cement the team's newfound status as a perennial bowl invitee and to watch with awe the greatest Tiger ever--has turned into a season of injury (to both body and pride). Mario Pratcher won't play a down this season, Patrick Byrne broke his leg, followed by Will Hudgens doing the exact same thing--those injuries were bad enough. On top of that, I have to think that watching the defense get gashed time and time again by UCF was maybe more painful to the pride of Tiger fans. 57 carries for 261 yards? This wasn't 1995 Nebraska, it was 2005 UCF. Yes, Joe Lee Dunn's system isn't working--and yes, this team might be better served with a different defensive identity--but when the team gets whipped, the team gets whipped. The Tigers missed LaVale Washington badly on Saturday night. And there's no question the team has missed Albert Means all season long. There's just not enough depth, and part of that I would have to attribute to Joe Lee Dunn's unwillingness to recruit. They need more talent, and fast, and it would be nice to have a defensive coordinator that actually leaves the campus to recruit.

I think the offense is worthy of a little criticism as well. I realize that it's very hard to prepare a contingency plan for losing your two starting quarterbacks in the first three games of the season, but if you recruit Billy Barefield as a quarterback, he's got to be able to play quarterback at the D-1 level, and I'm not convinced. DeAngelo's DeHydration didn't help matters at all on Saturday, and the highly-touted young wide receiving corps has not been physical enough to make an impact. Those around Barefield have to get better (DeAngelo obviously excluded), and quickly.

Another unbelievable run, though...that much I have to admit. DeAngelo is so much better than anyone else on the field (in almost any game in which he plays) that it's frightening.

As for Tennessee, I hate to repeat myself, but it is becoming more and more obvious that Rick Clausen is just not good enough to be an SEC quarterback. Through coaching indecision and a lack of foresight, Phillip Fulmer derailed this season before it even got started. It had been obvious that Fulmer wanted Ainge to be his quarterback, and he tried every way possible to make that happen, but Clausen beat Ainge out for the QB spot during camp. He played better, looked better, and was the better QB. Yet Ainge was named the starter. That was the beginning of the end. It killed Ainge's confidence to be put out there when he didn't deserve it, killed the players' confidence in Ainge knowing he was only out there because Fulmer gave him the job, and it killed Rick Clausen's belief in the coaching staff since he won the job in camp, but didn't get it. Georgia played a very solid, very smart game against Tennessee--D.J. Shockley looked good both throwing and running, the run game was solid, and I thought their big tight end Leonard Pope was outstanding. UT had no answers for his size and great hands. Georgia is certainly now the outright favorite to head to Atlanta representing the SEC East--while Tennessee may well slip all the way to the Music City Bowl. That is the very definition of a disappointing season.

At this point, if Tennessee struggles mightily against Alabama (in what is sure to be an incredibly emotional game) with Clausen at the helm, I would have to recommend going with Ainge for the rest of the season, if for no other reason than to try to restore some of the kid's confidence. You have to find out what you've got with Ainge sooner rather than later.

Enough of that; on to Ole Miss--it is simply mind-boggling that this offense is as bad as it is. The talent on the offensive line is abysmal--apart from Oher, there's just not much there. Without a line, no offense can succeed. Only scoring 3 points in the first half of a game against a mediocre 1-AA team? That's just sad. Ed Orgeron benched Micheal Spurlock not because he was terrible, but to try ANYTHING to put a spark in the team. Robert Lane then came in and promptly threw a pick. Again, I ask: is Ethan Flatt dead? Did we not find out about some kind of accident he had? I think he's still on the roster...hang on, let me go check...

Yep. He's there.

"Remember me, Coach O?"

Here's the checklist: Spurlock--not good enough; Lane--not good at all; Flatt--?????

If I recall, he played well enough last year in the QB trifecta that David Cutcliffe used last year. So why not try him this season? Clearly, something has to be done or Ole Miss will be overrun in their last few games against the elite of the SEC West.

Oh, and before I forget, here's your Coincidence of the Week That Has No Actual Relevance But Still Seems Kind of Interesting: This is either a banner season or a renaissance season for teams associated with gold. Let me explain:

Notre Dame has been great this season
UCLA is on the way back (great win vs. Cal on Saturday)
Vanderbilt is having an amazing season (destruction by LSU aside)
The Minnesota GOLDEN Gophers are winning big games
Boston College is better than usual
Colorado's on the way back
Baylor just won it's first Big 12 road game ever
The Tulsa GOLDEN Hurricane are leading the C-USA's West division
The UCF GOLDEN Knights are leading the East

Amazing, isn't it?

The New sports56whbq.com is Here!

2005-10-05T16:30:00.000-06:00

After a lot of work from a lot of different people, we've finally got our new site up and running. I have to tell you that a lot of the reason I haven't updated the blog so often lately is because I've been busy with the new site. I hope you will enjoy it--we, along with the folks at RDG, have put a great deal of time and effort into it. It will grow and get better, but I think you'll already see a lot of the improvements.

The biggest improvement for me is that you can now download a lot of our interviews! If you missed, for example, Jerry West on with George and Geoff this morning, or you missed Michael Heisley on with me and Ron yesterday, you can now download those interviews at your convenience on sports56whbq.com! We'll also have pictures and other great stuff on the site as time goes on, but, for now, enjoy the new look. Let me know what you think.

I was in Knoxville this past weekend to watch Tennessee take on Ole Miss. First of all, I love getting back up to Neyland Stadium--most of you know that Tennessee's my alma mater, so it's always awesome to see the stadium where I spent many an hour watching Tennessee play. Not much has changed, although they've put together a plan to upgrade a lot of the interior and exterior of the stadium to modernize it. Looks cool.

I watched from a seat high up in the stadium, which afforded me a nice view of routes, holes, etc. From there, I saw why Phil Fulmer just isn't convinced about Rick Clausen--Clausen missed several open, and I mean WIDE OPEN receivers because his vision and his arm just aren't that good. He's undoubtedly a great leader, and definitely the right QB for the team right now, but I'm just saying I understand now more clearly why Fulmer took so long to come around on him. Fulmer still bungled the QB thing tremendously, don't get me wrong, but it's just easier now to see how and why he actually did it.

Tennessee's defense is for real. That front four is scary. Jesse Mahelona is a complete freak, and Justin Harrell and Parys Haralson are underrated. The CBs are coming around, and (knock on wood) Kevin Simon hasn't been injured yet. The defense has carried Tennessee this year, and will have to do so for the rest of the season--the offense is WAYYYY behind.

As for Ole Miss, well, let me be blunt. They are a bad football team. With a few notable exceptions, the talent simply isn't there. Mico McSwain has a bright future, Patrick Willis is the heart and soul of that defense, and Michael Oher will be a great lineman--other than that, I don't see, um, anything at all to get excited about. I still have a lot of questions about Ed Orgeron's long-term leadership of that team. Maybe when the talent level increases (and it better), then Orgeron can properly be judged. For now, I'm not on the bandwagon.

Quick Ole Miss question: Did Ethan Flatt run over Ed Orgeron's dog or something? Is Flatt still alive? Couldn't Ole Miss, you know, at least TRY him at the QB? It's not like Spurlock is freaking Eli Manning or anything--hell, he's barely Stuart Patridge. And the less said about Robert Lane the better...

Random Thoughts to Finish this Random Blog

--Kudos to Karl Malone for helping clear out the destruction caused by Hurricane Katrina in Pascagoula, Mississippi. He worked 12 hours a day for two straight weeks free of charge and did that town a huge service in the process. While I was never the biggest Mailman fan on the court, off the court, the guy is outstanding.

--Pau Gasol's beard? Unless it's made of lead, it's not going to help.

--Be sure to check out the brand-new NHL on the Outdoor Life Network! I believe you can catch it right after Buck Slapjack's World of Bowhuntin' and right before the World Fishing Federation. OLN is like Channel 200-something on most of your cable outlets. It's before you get to the Chinese News Channel, though.

--Joe Theismann > Tyrone Prothro, but barely.

--I still contend that Tyrone Prothro and Brodie Croyle should not have been in that game. Alabama was up 4 touchdowns in the 4th quarter against an offense that had shown NOTHING in the entire game--no reason for those guys to be in the game. That said, Alabama is the best team in the SEC, and Brodie Croyle is the best quarterback.

--Tennessee could play five teams ranked 6th or higher this season, four of them on the road.

--On a personal note, my broadcasting professor is featured in those University of Tennessee ads you see during UT football games. He's sitting outside with the class in a circle, something that NEVER ACTUALLY HAPPENED when I was in school. Just sayin'. He's a good guy, though.

I'm done, but you've got to check out the new sports56whbq.com and let me know what you think!

Back At It

2005-09-07T23:55:00.000-06:00

Wow. How about this? I felt a bit like Fish there, not blogging for almost a month. But you can't keep a good man down, and I'm back on duty and ready to roll. This is likely to be a rather lengthy blog, but I think you'll enjoy every minute of reading it. If you don't, just remember what you paid to access this site.

I would be remiss if I didn't mention first and foremost my absolute horror at the events that took place along the Mississippi Gulf Coast over the past week and a half or so. I have, as I'm sure most of you have, been riveted to the coverage, both local (WWL TV in New Orleans is great) and national. A couple of my coworkers and a few friends have been seriously affected by this disaster, and I find it very hard to even conceive of the pain they are going through. The very least any of us can do it to give. There are hundreds of worthwhile organizations that are working like crazy to help those who need it most, but I will highlight just a few that I feel strongly about:

The Salvation Army

Presbyterian Disaster Relief

Memphis Food Bank

Also, we will be doing a bunch of shows tomorrow from down at FedExForum to help Elliot Perry raise money for local Katrina evacuees. Please come down and join us, and please open up your checkbook--we will be hearing from a bunch of current and former athletes, including Elliot himself, Penny Hardaway, Lorenzen Wright, Antonio Burks, Cedric Henderson, Cletidus Hunt, Isaac Bruce, Brevin Knight, and many others. It will be well worth your time, so please come on out and join us.

I sincerely hope that New Orleans will manage to keep both the Saints and the Hornets there for the long term, but I don't think that will be possible. I can't imagine that the people there will have the disposable income to support an NFL or an NBA team, and I expect that both team owners (who are not particularly fan-friendly, and that's putting it mildly) will eventually uproot each franchise. I hope I'm wrong.

I also want to take a little time to thank everyone for supporting the new soccer show, Soccer Fix. You can hear it every Wednesday from 10-11 on Sports 56 WHBQ. We've gotten a lot of positive response from people, and I am glad to know that there is a soccer audience out there listening. Let me know what you want to hear on the show--email me at peter@sports56whbq.com and tell me. University of Memphis men's soccer coach Richie Grant is my cohost, and he is doing a phenomenal job. I appreciate how quickly he has taken to the radio gig, and how much work he has put into it already. By the way, go check out the U of M soccer teams throughout the season--they play at a very high standard, and it is very entertaining to watch. I saw a 4-3 thriller between Memphis and Oral Roberts (the Tigers won), and it was as exciting a match as you'll want to see. Here are their schedules: (Men's / Women's).

Speaking of soccer, I have to comment on my favorite team, Newcastle United, as it has been an incredible last 10 days or so. First, the team put in a couple of dire performances against West Ham (0-0) and Bolton (2-0 loss), followed by a decent, if uninspiring performance at home against Manchester United (2-0 loss). This tremendously poor run was followed by a remarkable series of signings: first, Albert Luque, a Spanish international from Deportivo La Coruna was signed for around $16 million. Luque will provide much-needed width on the left side of midfield and can serve as a striker. The final signing of the transfer period saw the return of Nobby Solano to Newcastle to serve as a right-sided midfielder--Nobby is a personal favorite and I am really glad to see him back. It was the signing in between that has set the Toon army on fire:

MICHAEL OWEN!

I would say that qualifies as a pretty exciting signing. I cannot believe that the club managed to pull it off, but they did, and I am amazed. Owen is a genuine world-class goalscorer and considering that Newcastle have yet to score this season, I would say that's an area of need. For Owen's explanation of why he made the move he made, click here. The season well and truly begins on Saturday, when Newcastle play Fulham at home.

For the record, here is my preferred lineup for Newcastle (assuming all players are healthy):

---------------------------Given-----------------------------

Carr--------Boumsong----------Bramble-------Taylor

Solano----------Emre----------Parker-----------Luque

-------------------Owen---------Shearer------------------

All right. Enough of that.

As for last weekend in college football, I was hoping for so much more out of the Memphis/Ole Miss game. It was an intense contest, yes, and there were some vicious hits, but the quality of play on the field was really low. It was flat-out boring. For Memphis fans, it was a cruel blow to lose your starting quarterback just three plays into the season. It is very difficult to prepare for anything like that. It must be said, however, that Will Hudgens did in the game what he has done throughout practice: he showed great physical gifts but a poor grasp of the offense. That's why Patrick Byrne was named the starter--he knew the offense backwards and forwards. Hudgens was confused and made poor decisions.

For Ole Miss fans, though the team didn't look like anything approaching an SEC West contender, the defnse was much better, much more organized, and--how about this--Micheal Spurlock looked like a decent quarterback! That's a change right there. The running game was abysmal, the O-line was unconvincing, and the receivers dropped a ton of passes, but they won, and they, like Memphis, have a week off to fix a lot of problems. I was impressed with the way Ed Orgeron rallied the entire team together during the final timeout of the game--he's big on team spirit, and I think it actually paid off towards the end of the game. The Rebel linebackers were phenomenal.

Don't read too much into Tennessee's close victory over UAB. Tennessee typically starts slow, in this case not only because Phillip Fulmer plays it close to the vest in the first game of the season, but also because UAB is a pretty good team. Darrell Hackney will be playing on Sunday, and the Blazers have got a nice collection of talent. Tennessee will be fine going down to the Swamp next Saturday.

Speaking of the Swamp, Florida looked very solid against Wyoming. I was impressed with the defensive effort, and I think Chris Leak will adapt wonderfully to Urban Meyer's offense. Georgia just bludgeoned Boise State thanks in large part to the fact that Jared Zabransky's Heisman hopes spiralled down in a blaze of crap in Athens. He was just awful, while D. J. Shockley stepped out of David Greene's shadow and played extremely well. I don't know if Georgia all of a sudden becomes SEC East favorites just yet--I'll be watching their performance against South Carolina this weekend with interest.

All right. That's enough blogging for now. If you read this far, you are a wonderful human being. See you tomorrow out at FedExForum--be sure to give generously as we try to help the Katrina evacuees.

Adrian McPherson

2005-08-14T17:19:00.000-06:00

Yeah, still workin' out a few kinks for the rookie QB. Lining up under CENTER is really the first step to success, Adrian. Other than that, you're doing great!

It All Comes Down to This

2005-08-09T10:16:00.000-06:00

I cannot believe it, but we are at the last round of the 1st Annual Morning Rush Babe Tournament. Somehow Karson and Kennedy have fought against the odds and have made it to a deciding Round 7 of the Finals. This is an historic moment in Morning Rush history. Here are the official results from Round 6:

Karson/Kennedy: Alyssa Milano (28) vs. Middays: Kelly Monaco (20)

I was surprised that Alyssa Milano pulled away at the end--after around 7:45 (and after Ole Miss Offensive Coordinator Noel Mazzone gave his approval to Milano), it was all Alyssa. Kelly Monaco started out strong, but faded badly late in the contest--it had to be a cruel blow for Middays after they rolled the dice and went for the kill in Round 6 with the substitution. Their gamble did not work. Now, it sets up an epic Round 7, with everything on the line. Here's the matchup:

Paris Hilton (Karson/Kennedy) vs. Maria Sharapova (Middays)

In lieu of my usual preview, I have solicited comments and predictions from around the Sports 56 WHBQ offices:

Craig Wack, Commercial Appeal Racing Writer and co-host of Memphis Motorsports Weekly:

"This is a matchup of "dirty Paris" versus "seemingly clean Maria"; how you feel about this all depends on if you prefer a rich good girl or a richer bad girl."

PREDICTION: Hilton, in a close contest.

Tyler McLellan, Producer of The Morning Rush:

"I pick Sharapova, because everyone hates Paris Hilton."

PREDICTION: Sharapova (obviously)

Danni, host of Middays With Danni on Q107.5:

"Maria Sharapova is not a skank and she actually has a talent--she can do something besides spend money."

PREDICTION: Sharapova, but it's close

Zeke Terry, Commercial Production/Imaging, Flinn Broadcasting:

"Paris Hilton will win because she's more well-known. Sex always wins."

PREDICTION: Hilton

DJ Superman, Hot 107:

"The thing with Paris that attracts--see, she's not all that hot--but it's the money. That other girl--she ain't got that much money. Paris Hilton can do some things--don't get it twisted--but it's all the amenities and parties...what man wouldn't want that?"

PREDICTION: Sharapova, surprisingly enough

Will Askew, Host of Inside the Memphis Redbirds and Chip Shots and Babe Draft Expert:

"Hilton is very much a polarizing force--you either love her or you hate her. Everyone loves Sharapova. Sharapova is well-known in the sports circuit, and she's pure--but Hilton is a skank. That's why Sharapova will carry the day."

PREDICTION: Sharapova

Geoff Calkins, Commercial Appeal Lead Columnist and Co-host of Sportstime:

"I haven't seen a final matchup this disappointing since Bush v. Gore in 2000. I question the sanity of the team owners for putting these two forward. On the one hand, you've got a skank; on the other hand, you've got a beautiful (by sports standards) woman who is at best a B+ by Hollywood standards. Having seen the Paris Hilton video, Sharapova has better strokes."

PREDICTION: Sharapova

I've also managed to get a comment from each of the teams represented in the Babe Tournament Finals:

Eli Savoie, Middays:

"The Middays program feels very confident sending a classy young woman like Maria Sharapova against a skank like Paris Hilton."

Karson, Karson and Kennedy

"Paris Hilton is the girl who will take one for the team."

If I am forced to make my prediction, it would be Paris Hilton. I know she's dirty, and probably the owner of at least 2 different STDs, but she's attractive, and she's got serious name recognition all around the world. Sharapova is classy, but maybe too classy--she might be too clean-cut to win this competition. We've seen throughout the competition that being skanky is not necessarily a bad thing when it comes to winning rounds. I think Hilton's fame and fortune lead her to the victory, and that, of course, would mean Karson and Kennedy would be crowned the first-ever Babe Tournament champions.

Of course, it's not up to any of those people quoted above--it's up to all of you. Every vote is critical for this matchup. Go ahead and email your votes to rush@sports56whbq.com or call the program at 360-8255 or 1-888-360-8255 for those of you outside the Memphis Metro area. In fact, you can go ahead and call to give your vote off the air--and you can definitely call during tomorrow morning's show to vote. A champion will be crowned tomorrow at 7:50 am--tune in to find out who wins!

Finals--Round 6

2005-08-08T09:49:00.000-06:00

We can crown a champion on Tuesday--or we can see the Finals extended to an epic Round 7. After today's action, Middays is up 3-2. Here are the official results:

Middays: Salma Hayek (30) vs. Karson/Kennedy: Gwen Stefani (7)

Sadly predictable. Stefani falls to 0-2, having lost by a combined 65-15 in her two competitions. With that, she is confirmed as clearly the worst pick in the (admittedly short) history of the Babe Draft. Karson and Kennedy really should lose just for picking her in the 5th round (or for picking her at all). Salma Hayek cruised this morning, as everyone fully expected she would. Now, Middays is just one win away from taking home the trophy and becoming the champions of the Babe Tournament. Quite an honor.

Eli Savoie from the Middays program called me this morning after today's edition of the Morning Rush and said that he was going for the kill--he's decided to make a substitution, and replace today's proposed starter Eva Mendes with one of his girls in the hot tub--Kelly Monaco. A bold move by Savoie, one that may pay off with a big win today. Here's the official matchup:

Kelly Monaco (Middays) vs. Alyssa Milano (Karson/Kennedy)

This is as even a matchup as you can get. Alyssa Milano has a little more name recognition than Kelly Monaco, I think. You might recall Alyssa Milano as Samantha from Who's the Boss; who really could forget such a television classic? You also might remember Alyssa's role in a legendary Skinemax film: Poison Ivy 2. As far as great sequels are concerned, I'd put Poison Ivy 2 right up there with The Godfather II or even Kickboxer 2: The Road Back. It's that good.

Meanwhile, Kelly Monaco should be completely unknown to you unless you watch soap operas or the inexplicable summer hit TV show Dancing With the Stars. However, despite her lack of fame, she's absolutely gorgeous. Do some research on her, and I think you'll be pleased.

I have no prediction here, because I simply don't know what to expect--these are two B- or C- level actresses, but they're gorgeous. We need your vote as we could crown a champion tomorrow morning--call 360-8255 or 1-888-360-8255, or you can email us at rush@sports56whbq.com . Thanks for all the calls and emails--we appreciate them.

Finals--Round 5

2005-08-07T20:01:00.000-06:00

It is all tied up. Honors even thus far between Middays and Karson/Kennedy, as there was a VERY surprising (to me, at least) outcome in Round 4 of the Finals on Friday. Here it is:

Karson/Kennedy: Carmen Electra (28) vs. Middays: Jennifer Garner (15)

First of all, before I break down what exactly happened on Friday, allow me to address an issue that has been brought up. A listener to the program, Michael, emailed me and accused me of playing favorites with the pictures I choose of the competing babes. This is untrue. Now that the Morning Rush is out, I have no dog in this fight. I don't care who wins; I just want the will of the people to be represented. The reason you see the pictures you see above is because they were the right size for me to be able to squeeze them onto this site. I have to have pictures of a certain size, and sometimes it is hard to find good ones for a particular woman. Feel free to go to Google Images and look up the babe yourselves if you want additional shots. I just wanted you guys to know why I pick the pictures I pick.

I am stunned that Jennifer Garner is now 0-2 in competition. Stunned. She was a top 10 talent on the big board, but no one has been more disappointing. She promised much and delivered none. Meanwhile, the much-maligned Carmen Electra finishes up at 2-0 in individual competition and she just dominated her opponents. She's like Reggie Miller of a couple of years back--older, yes, but still very effective in the clutch.

That means that it's now 2-2 in the Finals. It could not be any closer. The FM crew is doing a lot better than I tholught they would, but I think it's about to get worse for them, because here is the matchup:

Salma Hayek (Middays) vs. Gwen Stefani (Karson/Kennedy)

If there is any justice in this world, this should be an absolute massacre. Gwen Stefani lost by a billion in the semifinals, while Salma Hayek lost by one to incredible beauty Charlize Theron. We actually should probably spot Stefani 10-15 votes at the outset. She would still lose badly.

We need you votes now more than ever. One team is just two wins away from winning it all; two wins from being crowned the Babe Tournament Champions. You guys are the only ones who can make that happen, though--call the show at 360-8255 or email us at rush@sports56whbq.com to make your vote count.

By the way, Ole Miss week begins tomorrow with head coach Ed Orgeron--he'll be on with us around 7:10 in the morning. Ole Miss week is brought to you by Mike Harrington with Plantation and Cherokee Valley Golf Clubs in North Mississippi. Later in the week, you'll hear from offensive coordinator Noel Mazzone, SID Langston Rogers, and the voice of the Rebels David Kellum. Should be fun--college football is almost here.

Finals--Round 4

2005-08-04T07:24:00.000-06:00

It was every bit the battle I expected it to be, but Middays took a huge step towards hoisting the Babe Tournament Trophy over their heads this morning:

Middays: Angelina Jolie (22) over Karson/Kennedy: Jessica Simpson (19)

I knew it would be close, and it was. I knew Jessica Simpson would perform well, and she did. But ultimately, I knew that Jolie had that little extra something that would push her over the top. She did. I don't know what it is about Jolie, if it's her incredible lips, her attitude or what, but she's just got what the people want. Jessica Simpson, while beautiful, doesn't have any kind of extra sizzle to put her into Jolie's category. Plus, Jessica's dumber than a bag of hammers. Jolie's smart. For me, that makes a difference.

Karson and Kennedy face a huge mountain now. They simply must win tomorrow's matchup to have any shot whatsoever of winning it all. Greg and Eli can relax now, because I can't see K Squared picking up three of the next four rounds to win it all. I don't think that can happen, but if it is going to, it needs to start tomorrow with this matchup:

Carmen Electra (Karson/Kennedy) vs. Jennifer Garner (Middays)

Carmen proved to me in the semifinals that she can still bring it with the fans. She's still got that name recognition, and she's still got a smokin' body. Jennifer Garner lost in the semis to Vida Guerra, a result labeled as controversial because of accusations against me--people claim that I chose a horrible picture of Garner to display in order to ensure that Guerra, the Morning Rush candidate, would win. These accusations, sadly, are true. We needed the victory. I apologize. I hope you will find that the above picture of Garner redeems my earlier mistake.

Garner should probably win, because she is hotter--but she's also pregnant right now, while Electra is still a gorgeous little skank. Electra may pull this one out yet. I know the Q107.5 crew is begging for it to happen. If they don't get this one, it is OVER.

Make your voice heard by emailing us at rush@sports56whbq.com or by calling us at 360-8255. On tomorrow's program, Memphis week concludes with a double shot: Commercial Appeal reporter Phil Stukenborg will join us, along with offensive line coach Rick Mallory. Thanks again for tuning in.

Finals--Round 3

2005-08-03T20:56:00.000-06:00

After two rounds of the Babe Tournament Finals, we are all knotted up at 1. Here's the results from earlier today:

Middays: Halle Berry (25) vs. Karson/Kennedy: Jenna Jameson (8)

Absolutely no doubt about this outcome at all. It probably shouldn't even have been that close. Jenna Jameson was an embarrassment--not even in the same league remotely as Halle Berry. I know Halle Berry is kind of crazy--well, actually, she's really crazy--but she's unbelievable and she's not a PORN STAR. Just because she went topless in Swordfish and had that wild sex scene in Monster's Ball doesn't make her a porn star, like Jenna. Fortunately, you guys came through and redeemed your picking ability with this one--that means the Finals are squared up at 1 apiece going into tomorrow's pivotal Round 3.

Here's the Round 3 matchup:

Jessica Simpson (Karson/Kennedy) vs. Angelina Jolie (Middays)

This may be my favorite matchup so far. I asked Weinberger what he thought of this one, and he said, "It could go either way." So true, Jeff, so true. Who to pick here? You could go with the idiot or the freak. The smoking hot airhead or the gorgeous woman obsessed with death--which will it be? I hate to even try to predict this one, because I have no idea how people are going to respond--not a clue. I'll talke Jolie by 1 or 2, but this one should be close. I will say this: judging by the remaining matchups, Karson an d Kennedy better win this one, because if not, it could get ugly.

Email rush@sports56whbq.com or call the show at 360-8255 to get your vote in; voting ends at 7:55 am tomorrow. Also, we'll be talking with University of Memphis WR Coach/Recruiting Coordinator Clay Helton as University of Memphis week presented by Wingstop continues on the Morning Rush. Thanks for reading and listening--you guys are the best.

The Finals--Round Two

2005-08-02T07:22:00.000-06:00

First of all, let me apologize for the lack of an update over the last few days; with the trip to Birmingham, an unusually hectic weekend, and the Liberty Bowl Golf Classic yesterday, I have not been able to update the site. My bad.

Now, on to business: I am still very disappointed that the Morning Rush is out of its own tournament. We created it, we run it, and now, we're out. It was an epic 7-round series between us and Middays, with Middays winning Round 7 by 5 votes. Maria Sharapova ended up eliminating Serena Williams 45-40; a huge response by callers and emailers, but unfortunately, it was huge for Maria Sharapova. We did get a lot of pity votes for Serena, with explanations like: "I like you guys and I like the show, so I guess I'll vote for Serena. But I still don't know why you drafted her." I guess a vote's a vote.

Here are the official completed semifinal results:

Karson and Kennedy beat the Sports Bar 4-1:

Beyonce Knowles 34 Jessica Alba 32
Gwen Stefani 8 Elizabeth Hurley 35
Jenna Jameson 21 Brittany Daniel 19
Jessica Simpson 25 Brooke Burke 16
Carmen Electra 28 Pamela Anderson 10

Middays over the Morning Rush 4-3

Eva Longoria 36 Elisha Cuthbert 30
Salma Hayek 21 Charlize Theron 22
Halle Berry 21 Anna Kournikova 19
Angelina Jolie 24 Gabrielle Union 21
Jennifer Garner 17 Vida Guerra 23
Eva Mendes 22 Tyra Banks 25
Maria Sharapova 45 Serena Williams 40

That means the Finals matchup is Middays against Karson and Kennedy, and Round 1 of the Finals is already in the books, and it is a huge surprise to me:

Karson/Kennedy: Beyonce Knowles (31) over Middays: Eva Longoria (17)

How in the world did Eva Longoria lose by two touchdowns? She was the top overall selection, and one of the most popular draftees, and yet Beyonce absolutely smoked her in Round 1. Stunning, stunning development here. This has to be very troubling for Greg and Eli, who would have certainly counted on Eva to give them an easy victory in Round 1 of the Finals. Beyonce has proven herself to be the star of the Babe Drafct thus far, as she is now 2-0 herself, with wins over incredible talents like Jessica Alba and Eva Longoria. Beyonce is like Tom Brady--she's just a winner. Now, Greg and Eli are on the ropes just a little bit in this matchup.

Despite the Round 1 shocker, there is no question to me that Greg and Eli have the stronger overall roster. As it stands right now, here are the projected starters for this series (in the format K/K vs. Middays):

Round 1: Beyonce (31) over Longoria (17)
Round 2 (Wednesday): Jenna Jameson vs. Halle Berry
Round 3 (Thursday): Jessica Simpson vs. Angelina Jolie
Round 4 (Friday): Carmen Electra vs. Jennifer Garner
(if necessary) Round 5 (Monday): Gwen Stefani vs. Salma Hayek
(if necessary) Round 6 (Tuesday): Alyssa Milano vs. Eva Mendes
(if necessary) Round 7 (Wednesday): Danica Patrick vs. Maria Sharapova

I should point out that the teams are free to swap one girl out for one of their bench players, or to pick up a free agent and move her into their lineup. They may not take any girl from a team already eliminated, however.

Babe Tournament Finals Round 2:

Halle Berry (Middays) vs. Jenna Jameson (Karson/Kennedy)

When one looks up the term "mismatch" in a dictionary, this is what they see. If Jenna Jameson gets within 10 votes of Halle Berry, it is a crime against humanity. Halle Berry is gorgeous, talented, and presumably has not shown her genitalia to the world via the magic of videotape. Jenna Jameson, on the other hand, has. Seriously, this can't be close. After Middays inevitably ties this series at one apiece, then we can start talking about real competition.

Email your vote to rush@sports56whbq.com or call the program at 360-8255. We are not far away from crowning our first ever Babe Tournament champion, but we need your help to do it.

Semifinal Round 6 Results (Don't Call it a Comeback)

2005-07-28T15:10:00.000-06:00

First of all, I apologize for the lateness of this update, but the wireless internet here in Birmingham was down for the last few hours and only now is getting back to normal.

We are all the way back, baby! At one point, we were down 3-1, but we have brought it to even with two key victories--here are the details of today's triumph:

Morning Rush: Tyra Banks (25) vs. Middays: Eva Mendes (22)

Current Standings:

Karson and Kennedy beat the Sports Bar 4-1:

Beyonce Knowles 34 Jessica Alba 32
Gwen Stefani 8 Elizabeth Hurley 35
Jenna Jameson 21 Brittany Daniel 19
Jessica Simpson 25 Brooke Burke 16
Carmen Electra 28 Pamela Anderson 10

Middays and the Morning Rush tied 3-3

Eva Longoria 36 Elisha Cuthbert 30
Salma Hayek 21 Charlize Theron 22
Halle Berry 21 Anna Kournikova 19
Angelina Jolie 24 Gabrielle Union 21
Jennifer Garner 17 Vida Guerra 23
Eva Mendes 22 Tyra Banks 25

Analysis:

I felt very confident in Tyra Banks the entire time. She's not only got great name recognition, but she's got the incredible body and gorgeous face to go along with it. Mendes cannot hang with that. I'm glad that your votes confirmed my suspicions about the whole thing. The last two matchups have worked out perfectly for us; now, it is time for us to finish the job.

If you didn't hear the last segment of the show this morning, let me catch you up on the matchup for pivotal Round 7 of this epic semifinal:

Maria Sharapova (Middays) vs. Serena Williams (Morning Rush)

What better way to end this semifinal than by a classic tennis match? Maria Sharapova against Serena Williams. I have no idea what is going to happen here. Serena has grown on me--she has a crazy good body with a backfield second only to Vida Guerra--if you click on her name in the lineups a few posts below, you'll see the full impact of that booty. It's great. Sharapova looked great at the ESPYs recently, and I am not taking her lightly at all; I just know that Serena can get in done in the clutch. Ron and I have immense confidence in her ability to help us close this thing out.

It is critical for you to call or email your votes on this matchup as soon as you can. This is the one that will decide who heads to the finals to face Karson and Kennedy, and who goes home in shame. Email the program at rush@sports56whbq.com or call in at 360-8255 and let us know. It all comes down to this.

Semifinal Round 5 Results (Goodbye Fish)

2005-07-27T08:32:00.000-06:00

We're still in it! The Morning Rush was teetering on the edge of the cliff, but we managed to survive for another round. Unfortunately for Rob Fischer and the Sports Bar, his group of ladies gave a sad, pathetic, uninspired performance and he is out. Done. I should point out that Ron Tillery did, in fact, predict that Rob Fischer would be first out, and it has indeed come to pass. Here are today's official results:

Morning Rush: Vida Guerra (23) vs. Middays: Jennifer Garner (17)

K Squared: Carmen Electra (28) vs. Sports Bar: Pamela Anderson (10)

Current Standings:

Karson and Kennedy beat the Sports Bar 4-1:

Beyonce Knowles 34 Jessica Alba 32
Gwen Stefani 8 Elizabeth Hurley 35
Jenna Jameson 21 Brittany Daniel 19
Jessica Simpson 25 Brooke Burke 16
Carmen Electra 28 Pamela Anderson 10

Middays leads the Morning Rush 3-2

Eva Longoria 36 Elisha Cuthbert 30
Salma Hayek 21 Charlize Theron 22
Halle Berry 21 Anna Kournikova 19
Angelina Jolie 24 Gabrielle Union 21
Jennifer Garner 17 Vida Guerra 23

Analysis:

A late flurry by the Pamela Anderson Fan Club of Memphis saved Pam's polymer-based, stain-resistant body from a complete shutout--but make no mistake, she got trounced. No surprise there. I am shocked--SHOCKED!--that Fish took her in the 4th round. A truly horrendous pick. Only the worse pick of Gwen Stefani by Karson and Kennedy saved the Sports Bar from being swept. At least Rob can hold on to the fact that he will forever be etched in history as the first team eliminated from the Babe Draft. Be strong, Fish.

Karson and Kennedy move on to the finals, where they will face either Middays or the Morning Rush. It could have been Middays, but Jennifer Garner could not get it done against the badonkadonk of Vida Guerra. I was confident that Vida could get it done, but I underestimated just how important a solid backfield with great movement is to the average Morning Rush listener. I will not make that mistake again. I think you have to label this a massive disappointment for Jennifer Garner and Middays, on the other hand. Massive. Jennifer Garner is so popular, and so well-known, yet could not match up against Guerra's ass. The backside reigns.

That sets up critical Round 6, with Middays still able to clinch a series win if their girl can get it done. On the other hand, Ron and I can set up a critical Game 7 with a win today. It's very, very tight--here's the matchup for today (remember, there's only one since the other series is over):

Eva Mendes (Middays) vs. Tyra Banks (Morning Rush)

Tyra Banks is absolutely amazing. Amazing. She combines an incredible body with a beautiful face as well as anybody in this entire draft. Plus, she has great name recognition, and I know you've all seen her work in Sports Illustrated or in a Victoria's Secret catalog. I really like this matchup for us. Eva Mendes is hot, and she was good in Hitch, a movie that I did not expect to like as much as I did. She's got a solid group of measurables, but I do think the face is a little questionable when compared to Tyra. That's why I think the Rush as the edge in this one. If we can just extend this series to the full 7, I think we'll pull out the win. It would be a comeback for the ages. First things first, though, we've gotta win Round 6 before we think about Round 7.

I want to again tell you guys how much I appreciate your support on this Babe Tournament--we read every email, and try to get as many on the air as we can--you guys have been fantastic with your support and I know you'll keep it up all the way through the finals. Email your vote to rush@sports56whbq.com or call the show at 360-8255.

Before I forget, I wanted to write a little something on last week's Bonzi Wells trade. It was obvious that Bonzi had to go, that he was going to go, and that it would happen soon--the only question was whether or not he would leave for nothing, or whether the Grizzlies would work hard to get something in return. The latter obviously turned out to be true.

The Grizzlies turned Bonzi into Bobby Jackson, Curtis Borchardt, Kirk Snyder, and Raul Lopez. I don't dislike the deal entirely; it's nice to get something back for Bonzi, but let's not overstate what the Grizzlies ended up getting. Bobby Jackson is far and away the centerpiece of the deal, but he is three years older than Bonzi, injury-prone, and not overly excited to be here (he really loved Sacramento). However, if he buys into the system here, he can be a locker room leader, something the Grizzlies have desperately needed for the last couple of years. If healthy, he will be a big part of next year's team. That's a massive if. Also, his contract expires after this coming season, and I have serious questions about his long-term future with this team.

As for Raul Lopez, his contract will be bought out by a Spanish team, and he will be playing overseas next year. That's around 2 million off the books there. Curtis Borchardt is big. That's about it. If Jake Tsakalidis is a 3 out of 10, Borchardt is a 3.05--which means he is definitely nothing special. Kirk Snyder didn't get along well with Jerry Sloan, and that made him expendable. He's a good defender, but still has a long way to go offensively, and a long way to go in getting a better attitude off the court. Perhaps the Grizzlies will set him straight. Let's hope so.

Whether anyone wants to admit it or not, this team is cutting costs, both in basketball operations and in business operations. The salaries on the basketball side have gotten out of hand--the Grizzlies had the 7th largest payroll in the NBA last year, including 5+ million dollars for Bo Outlaw, who you might remember playing for the Phenix Suns last year. You don't think that angers Michael Heisley a little bit? To pay a contract for a player that played against your team in the playoffs? It needs to be reined in, and it will eventually get reined in. Cost cutting does not have to happen all at once; it can occur over a number of years. And it will with this franchise.

By the way, I am writing this from the lobby of the Wynfrey Hotel just outside of Birmingham; it's a really nice place to stay. SEC Media Days are going to be crazy--so many people from all over the South converge on this event to see the spectacle. It's been fairly quiet so far, really--nothing bizarre or noteworthy has happened yet. One of the interesting things about this event is that people freak out over media guides. Media guides are like crack around here--you can only get one from every school and only with a registration pass. People are scuttling around trying to scam some extras, trying to get their fix...I'm telling you, if you come to Birmingham with 20 media guides from each school, you could live like a king.

Anyway, if anything notable happens, I'll tell you about it right here.

Thanks for reading.

Round 4 Results (Last Chance Saloon)

2005-07-26T08:22:00.000-06:00

Well, this is it. Back against the wall. The Morning Rush and the Sports Bar are both in serious jeopardy of being eliminated in 5 games. Here are the official results from Round 4:

Middays: Angelina Jolie (24) vs. Morning Rush: Gabrielle Union (21)

Karson/Kennedy: Jessica Simpson (25) vs. Sports Bar: Brooke Burke (16)

Current Standings:

Middays over Morning Rush 3-1:

Eva Longoria 36 Elisha Cuthbert 30
Salma Hayek 21 Charlize Theron 22
Halle Berry 21 Anna Kournikova 19
Angelina Jolie 24 Gabrielle Union 21

Karson/Kennedy over the Sports Bar 3-1:

Beyonce Knowles 34 Jessica Alba 32
Gwen Stefani 8 Elizabeth Hurley 35
Jenna Jameson 21 Brittany Daniel 19
Jessica Simpson 25 Brooke Burke 16

Analysis:

I am very proud of Gabrielle Union; she did much better than I would have imagined. She's a beautiful, classy lady and I know it hurt her deeply to lose this matchup for us. We've consoled her, and she feels a little better, but she was committed to the cause--meanwhile, the possibly psychotic Angelina Jolie and her perverse appeal managed to win you over. Actually, I can't blame you too much. Jolie is very, very special. Gabrielle just had a bad matchup; against almost anyone else, I think she wins easily.

In fact, I think our team has had some very bad matchups thus far--if we were playing the Sports Bar or Karson/Kennedy, we would be winning right now, that much I guarantee you. Instead, we are on the verge of being embarrassed and being eliminated.

In the other series, K-squared is on the verge of advancing to the finals after their girl Jessica Simpson slid by Brooke Burke by 9. This was a close contest until the end, when Simpson pulled away and eased to a victory. I agree with this decision, by the way--Simpson is just better in too many areas: face and body, most notably. Now, Brooke Burke likes to have fun, I'll give you that, and she's probably crazy at the parties, but Simpson's idiot charm is too much.

Today's Matchups:

Jennifer Garner (Middays) vs. Vida Guerra (Morning Rush)

Carmen Electra (K Squared) vs. Pamela Anderson (Sports Bar)

I have no idea what to expect between Guerra and Garner. Garner is the more traditional beauty, but I chose Guerra's photo to really accentuate her greatest asset. Guerra's backfield has no competition at all--it is truly and completely beyond comprehension. Obviously, we've got to win three straight now, and it starts with Guerra. She must come through. We're behind her all the way (for what it's worth, it's always best to be behind Guerra).

The other matchup would have been an epic struggle back in 1997--Pamela Anderson and Carmen Electra were the apex of hotness at that time. It's 2005. Actually, this matchup reminds me of when Hulk Hogan and the Ultimate Warrior squared off in WCW. Both of them still legends, but WAYYYYYYYYYY past their prime. The result: a horrible spectacle. This could be just like that. Many of our hottest babes in this competition were under 13 years old when these two were in their primes. Still, face to face, it is an interesting matchup. Instead of the epic paper v. plastic, it's just plastic v. plastic. Who will prevail?

Email your votes to rush@sports56whbq.com or call into the program at 360-8255. As always, we appreciate your votes and need them to come flowing in. Especially for Vida Guerra.

Semifinal Round 3 Results

2005-07-25T09:12:00.000-06:00

Here are the official Round 3 results:

Karson/Kennedy: Jenna Jameson (21) over Sports Bar: Brittany Daniel (19)

Middays: Halle Berry (21) over Morning Rush: Anna Kournikova (19)

Current Standings:

Middays 2, Morning Rush 1
Karson/Kennedy 2, Sports Bar 1

Analysis:

Well, I knew it would be close, and it was--but I am bitterly disappointed that Anna Kournikova lost. I thought she would be our stopper, our Eric Gagne, if you will; instead, she was our Eric Milton. I didn't realize how strong Halle Berry's support would end up being. People really love Halle Berry--that is our lesson today. Matchups are critical, and this was a bad one for my girl. JUST LOOK AT HER, PEOPLE! She looks like that and she LOST in the semis. Amazing. As hot as Kournikova is, I guess Halle's body just was too much to overcome. That was a pivotal round for us against Middays, and I fear that loss might be too much to overcome.

On to the other semifinal, and as I expected, no one knew who the hell Brittany Daniel was. No one. I'm not sure Fish really knew who she was when he drafted her. She's hot, but no way should a second round draft pick lose to a freaking porn star. And a very experienced porn star at that. Chalk this one up as a huge mistake by Rob Fischer in the draft process. He benefitted from Karson and Kennedy's bad pick in the last round; he lost because of a bad pick in this round. He gave this round away, because Jenna Jameson flat out should not be winning at this point in time.

Today's Matchups:

Angelina Jolie (Middays) vs. Gabrielle Union (Rush)

Jessica Simpson (K/K) vs. Brooke Burke (Sports Bar)

The Morning Rush needs a win in the worst possible way. If we go down 3-1 in the series, it is all over for us. How much would that suck to be the first team eliminated? We host the damn tournament! This is critical. I certainly think Gabrielle Union is beautiful, but does she have enough mainstream appeal to hang with Jolie? I hope so. It's not the best matchup for Gabrielle, to be honest. However, Jolie is wacked out of her gourd, though--remember that. She has a tattoo on her stomach that says in Latin "That which nourishes me, destroys me." Is that really hot? I'm not so sure.

Karson and Kennedy can also take command of their series if Jessica Simpson comes through for them against the hotness of Brooke Burke. Burke loves to party, and she's always looking hot on Wild on E! E! is mostly useless, but every now and then, you flip through the channels and catch a glimpse of Burke or some other hot chick, and it becomes valuable again. Jessica Simpson has tumbled a little bit as of late--for whatever reason, her stock is dropping fairly quickly. Still, she is fire.

My picks are Jolie (sadly) and Simpson--that would put the two semifinals within a game of being decided. As always, you can vote for your favorites at rush@sports56whbq.com . Also, you can call the show at (901) 360-8255 and vote--we'll take your votes off the air as well as on the air.

I'll be heading to Birmingham tomorrow afternoon for SEC Media Days--me, Eli, Fish, and Cobra will be there providing tremendous coverage. I hope to have access to the web so I can update the site frequently. I also plan on writing a little something about the Bonzi trade later today.

Thanks for coming to the site.

Babe Draft--Semifinal Round 2 Results

2005-07-22T08:07:00.000-06:00

The votes have been tallied once again, and the results of Round 2's matchups is as follows:

Morning Rush: Charlize Theron (22) over Middays: Salma Hayek (21)

Sports Bar: Elizabeth Hurley (35) over Karson/Kennedy: Gwen Stefani (8)

Series Standings:

Semi 1: Middays 1, Morning Rush 1
Semi 2: Karson/Kennedy 1, Sports Bar 1

I could not be more relieved that Charlize Theron pulled it out late against Salma Hayek--it literally came down to the last email vote, and fortunately for us, the vote was for Theron. I knew it would be close, but that was ridiculous. My girl Charlize pulled it out, though--thanks to your votes.

It is now confirmed that Gwen Stefani was a horrible pick. Stefani has no shot against anyone, much less a classic beauty like Elizabeth Hurley. Hurley opened strong in the email votes and carried it all the way home to an easy victory. Let's be frank: Stefani sucks.

You now have a very difficult set of decisions to make over the weekend, as the Round 3 matchups will put some of the most controversial and biggest names in the tournament against one another. Here are the previews:

Jenna Jameson (Karson/Kennedy) vs. Brittany Daniel (Sports Bar)

Anna Kournikova (Morning Rush) vs. Halle Berry (Middays)

For the first matchup, the biggest key will be the way people perceive Jenna Jameson. If they see her as a skank because of her extensive, EXTENSIVE sexual experience, then she will lose easily. On the other hand, if they perceive her experience as a positive because of her tremendous knowledge of the human body, she might pull out a surprise. One thing's for sure: there are no secrets with Jenna J. If you want to see it all, you can. In contrast, unless you've seen Joe Dirt, do you know who the hell Brittany Daniel is? Probably not--she's very hot, mind you, but a virtual unknown. This is a toss-up.

The other matchup is a toss-up, too, but for different reasons. Halle Berry vs. Anna Kournikova might be the best matchup in the entire tournament. Two stunningly hot women, one much older, one much more athletic, are going to face off. That's why I think you might need all weekend to decide who you like. So tough to choose...the incredible beauty of Kournikova against the stunning good looks of Berry. I'm obviously biased, but Anna might be the most gorgeous woman on the planet right now. I just don't see how you can vote against her or Halle Berry, but someone has to lose.

As always, you can email your picks for Round 3 of the semifinals to rush@sports56whbq.com . The deadline is 7:55am Central on Monday, July 25th. Thanks again for the great response so far. Your emails and calls are always appreciated, and they will be very much needed throughout the tournament.

Have a great weekend.

Babe Draft--Semifinal Round 1 Results

2005-07-21T08:53:00.000-06:00

Once again, all I can say is thank you all very much for the overwhelming response to our first day of matchups. We got almost more votes than we could handle, but we managed to tally them all up and determine our winners (number of votes in parentheses).

Middays: Eva Longoria (36) over Morning Rush: Elisha Cuthbert (30)

Karson & Kennedy: Beyonce Knowles (34) over The Sports Bar: Jessica Alba (32)

Scores after Round 1 of the Semis:

Middays 1, Morning Rush 0
Karson/Kennedy 1, Sports Bar 0

Remember, these are best 4 out of 7 series, so things are still a long way from being decided.

Here are the matchups for Round 2 of the Semifinals (feel free to start emailing your picks for these two right away):

Salma Hayek (Middays) vs. Charlize Theron (Morning Rush)

Elizabeth Hurley (Sports Bar) vs. Gwen Stefani (Karson/Kennedy)

I love these Round 2 matchups. For my money, it's the first big test for Karson and Kennedy as they test the mainstream appeal of Gwen Stefani. Elizabeth Hurley, while a little older (she's 40), is certainly a proven winner; it's time to see if Stefani can hang. By the way, Stefani is not as young as she acts--she's 35, so it's not like Hurley is that much older or anything. My prediction is that Hurley wins this one in fairly easy fashion.

For our Round 2 matchup, I love Charlize Theron--she is a stunningly beautiful woman. She's got a 7 inch height advantage over Hayek, as well as being 9 years younger. Certainly on paper, she's better. We need her to perform well because we simply cannot afford to go down 0-2 after the first two semifinal rounds. Salma Hayek is gorgeous, no question, and she's a worthy challenger. But Theron should be too much for her head to head. We'll see--again, it is up to all of you. Email us (rush@sports56whbq.com) with your picks for these two matchups as we draw closer and closer to the Finals, where we will crown the champion.

There is one bit of additional news that we couldn't get to on the show this morning: you may have heard the rumors that we have had trouble coming to an agreement with Tomika Skanes. Unfortunately, that is true. We have decided, as a result, to exercise our option to drop her and pick up a free agent. Ladies and gentlemen, the newest member of the Morning Rush babe team is WWE diva Stacy Keibler.

Go ahead, click on that link. You know you want to. Here's another picture for you:

Welcome to the team, Stacy.

Thanks again for all of the response to the tournament so far--keep it up. You guys are awesome (even if you did pick Longoria over Cuthbert).

Morning Rush Babe Draft Recap

2005-07-20T08:42:00.000-06:00

The 2005 Babe Draft has just ended, and I have to say it was a crazy hour and a half. Thanks to all of you for the calls and emails, and remember to keep them coming in because the matchups you need to vote on to determine the winners begin TODAY.

Here is how the teams look--click on each name for a picture (the caller/emailer that nominated that girl FIRST is noted in parentheses; remember, if your pick is on the winning team, you get a prize):

Middays w/ Greg and Eli
1st: Eva Longoria
2nd: Halle Berry (nominated by Mario)
3rd: Angelina Jolie
4th: Jennifer Garner (nominated by Pharaoh Joe)
5th: Salma Hayek
6th: Eva Mendes (nominated by Mary)
7th: Maria Sharapova
8th: Nikki Cox (nominated by Rick in E. Memphis)
9th: Kelly Monaco

Karson and Kennedy
1st: Beyonce Knowles
2nd: Jenna Jameson
3rd: Jessica Simpson
4th: Carmen Electra
5th: Gwen Stefani
6th: Alyssa Milano
7th: Danica Patrick
8th: Portia de Rossi
9th: Paris Hilton

The Morning Rush
1st: Elisha Cuthbert (nominated by Wink)
2nd: Anna Kournikova
3rd: Gabrielle Union (nominated by Earl in Raleigh)
4th: Vida Guerra (nominated by Cal)
5th: Charlize Theron (nominated by Greg in Bartlett)
6th: Tyra Banks (nominated by Cal)
7th: Catherine Bell (nominated by Chris)
8th: Serena Williams
9th: Tomika Skanes (nominated by Mario)

The Sports Bar
1st: Jessica Alba (nominated by Nick)
2nd: Brittany Daniel
3rd: Brooke Burke
4th: Pamela Anderson
5th: Elizabeth Hurley
6th: Keira Knightley (nominated by Davis)
7th: Mandy Moore
8th: Vanessa Marcil (nominated by Craig Wack)
9th: Alicia Keys

That's how it shaped up. Every team can now add one free agent to replace one of these girls, if they want. If that happens, I will definitely let you know right here.

Some of the notables that went undrafted include Cameron Diaz, Evangeline Lilly, Gisele Bundchen, Jennifer Aniston, Penelope Cruz, Christina Aguilera, Kate Winslet, Shania Twain, Jessica Biel, Scarlett Johansson, Rachel McAdams, Nicole Kidman, Joanna Krupa, Dee Griffin, Christina Milian, Ashanti, and many others.

As far as the Morning Rush goes, we feel very good about our lineup. Ron has sold me on Serena Williams, so I hope you guys will help to justify that pick. Elisha Cuthbert is such a strong prospect it's scary. She is incredibly attractive, and for those of you that have seen The Girl Next Door, you know how amazing she really is. For us to get BY FAR the top backfield in the draft in Vida Guerra and two of the top frontcourts in Catherine Bell and Tyra Banks is just good picking. Remember, ultimately it's up to all of you as to who wins.

Check Will's blog later today for his draft analysis, winners and losers, and his pick for the winner of the tournament as a whole. Now, onto the tournament itself--the first matchups of the semifinals are here, and you have to decide the winners:

Middays v. Morning Rush (Semifinal 1 - Round 1)

1) Eva Longoria (Middays) vs. 1) Elisha Cuthbert (Rush)

Karson/Kennedy vs. The Sports Bar (Semifinal 2 - Round 1)

1) Beyonce Knowles (K/K) vs. 1) Jessica Alba (Sports Bar)

Think of this as Game 1 of the Eastern/Western Conference Finals. It is a seven game series, but, by tomorrow, we will have a winner of each of the first games in the series.

Which girl is hotter? Send in your picks for each of them to rush@sports56whbq.com and tell us why! We will also take calls on these matchups during the show tomorrow--so let us know what you think. It's your contest now. For each of the upcoming matchups, I will post previews here on the site, so you can look at some pictures and know who's competing. Bookmark my blog and be sure to check it often so you have the latest information on Babe Draft 2005. Thanks again.

Will Kiper, Jr.'s Mock Draft

2005-07-19T15:31:00.000-06:00

FIRST ROUND

1. Middays w/ Greg and Eli: Greg and Eli want to go with a safe pick here at #1, and there may be no safer pick on the board than Eva Longoria of Desperate Housewives.

2. Karson and Kennedy: Talking to Karson, he was very much in favor of picking
the total package, and Jessica Simpson is a good girl whom he likes very much.

3. Morning Rush w/Peter and Ron: Peter and Ron make a fantastic move by taking the number 1 babe on my board, Elisha Cuthbert.

4. Sports Bar: Rob closes out the first round with a great end of the first round pick, Jessica Alba. Would have been a crime if she’d have slipped out of the first round.

SECOND ROUND

1. Sports Bar: Rob begins the second round by taking the first sister of the draft, Beyonce Knowles. An excellent pick that wouldn’t have been around next time.

2. Morning Rush: Halle Berry is a well-known commodity who has an Oscar to her credit. Some craziness issues, but a solid pick.

3. Karson and Kennedy: The hardest team to read takes Cameron Diaz in the second round. Clearly in tune with pop culture, and dating a Memphis guy in Justin Timberlake. Possibly a stretch in the second, but I like the pick.

4. Middays: With the final pick of the second, Eli is ecstatic as Angelina Jolie slips to him. I feel she is a bit overrated because of off-the-field issues, but a very good value with the last pick of the second round.

THIRD ROUND

1. Middays: Eli takes Anna Kournikova, whom he rightly believes is by far the hottest athlete on the board. A good value in the third.

2. Karson and Kennedy: Keeping pop culture in mind, K & K take Katie Holmes, who has some serious buzz about her right now. A huge stretch at this point in the draft.

3. Morning Rush: Peter and Ron can’t believe that she has slipped this far, but Jennifer Garner is their pick. A phenomenal value at this point in the draft.

4. Sports Bar: Rob is partial to pop culture and to the O.C., so he grabs Rachel Bilson, which is a gamble. The hotness is there, but the name recognition might be a little questionable.

FOURTH ROUND

1. Sports Bar: I don’t believe Fish will be able to hold off on taking Lindsey Lohan. A huge stretch who has been free-falling on many boards lately.

2. Morning Rush: I can’t believe she is still on the board. The Rush takes Evangeline Lilly, who is #4 on my big board. The best pick of the draft thus far.

3. K & K: I have a hunch that the Q-Unit will take Charlize Theron, who for some reason slips this far. GREAT pick.

4. Middays: Despite the hepatitis C, Middays takes Pamela Anderson, which, frankly, is a stupid pick. She has, Hep C, for gosh sakes!

FIFTH ROUND

1. Middays: Nikki Cox

2. K & K: Danica Patrick

3. Rush: Ashanti

4. Sports Bar: Paris Hilton

SIXTH ROUND

1. Sports Bar: Mandy Moore

2. Rush: Rachel McAdams

3. K & K: Maria Sharapova

4. Middays: Jennifer Aniston

SEVENTH ROUND

1. Middays: Kelly Monaco

2. K & K: Christina Milian

3. Rush: Gabrielle Union

4. Sports Bar: Elin Nordegren

EIGHTH ROUND

1. Sports Bar: Kelly Clarkson

2. Rush: Vida Guerra

3. K & K: Baby Spice (Emma Bunton)

4. Middays: Heidi Klum

NINTH ROUND

1. Middays: Christie Brinkley

2. K & K: Christina Aguilera

3. Rush: Uma Thurman

4. Sports Bar: LeAnn Tweeden

The Babe Draft is 22 Hours Away

2005-07-19T07:10:00.000-06:00

It's about that time. We've been planning and preparing and talking about it for a long time, but it's finally here--the 1st Annual Morning Rush Babe Draft is upon us. We've decided the draft order and the first round matchups, and here they are:

Draft Order:

1. Middays with Greg and Eli
2. Karson and Kennedy
3. MORNING RUSH
4. The Sports Bar

Clearly, we're not very smart. I mean, Ron and I had the draft lottery in the studio during our show, with our intern pulling out slips of paper we folded and put into our hat, and somehow we don't end up with the 1st overall pick? We're idiots. Anyway, there's no doubt in my mind that Greg and Eli will screw up their first overall pick, and I have no idea what Karson and Kennedy are going to do, so that means there's a good chance that our number one prospect may still be on the board at 3. The Sports Bar just got the wrong end of the stick this time. Sorry, Fish, but maybe if you updated your blog more often than once every 6 months you would get a break or two.

Semifinal Matchups:

Morning Rush vs. Middays
Karson and Kennedy vs. The Sports Bar

I like the matchup for us. I think Middays will be vulnerable to the type of attack we're going to put together. As far as the other semifinal series is concerned, I think Karson and Kennedy will edge The Sports Bar in 6 due to the pop culture knowledge that K/K bring to the event. Of course, you will decide the winners, not me.

The Commissioner:

Here are a few pictures of our beautiful commissioner, Amanda--we could not have a Babe Draft of any significance without a commissioner that can hold her own, and she can:

She's the one on the far left in this picture.

Here she is with some random dude.

And here she is hugging Q107.5's Lugnut. Always a proud moment, that.

She runs the show. If you have any problems with the way things go, it's up to her to make everything right. And she is always in control.

Once the teams are picked, each team will rank its babes from 1-7, and the matchups will be decided that way. Our #1 takes on Middays' #1, our #2 takes on their #2, and so on. Two matchups per day, one from each series. I'll try to post picutres and previews on this site for each matchup, so you will have some basis for your votes. We'll announce the next day's matchup at the end of each edition of the Morning Rush, so those of you that email the show can get those picks in throughout the day. It will be awesome. Also, we've still got time for your nominations, but not much. If your nominee is on the winning team, you will win a great Sports 56 WHBQ prize.

Thanks for the emails and calls we've gotten so far--this has been great. I can't wait for tomorrow's draft.

Monday Stuff

2005-07-18T08:14:00.000-06:00

If you heard the show this morning, you heard us interview Nikki Boertman, the Commercial Appeal photographer who has become a rising prospect in the Morning Rush Babe Draft. She's moving up somne boards, folks, and I wanted you to be able to see what she looks like.

You can see why some people would compare her to Sarah Jessica Parker...

See the resemblance? Nikki was very confident that she would not only be drafted highly, but that she would be a starter for the winning team. She pretty much called her shot. We'll see if she's right on Wednesday.

Speaking of pictures, here's one of Tomika Skanes, the "Blasian" (Black/Asian) model that Mario brought to our attention:

Yeah. That's nice. Good work, Mario. Tomika's got a real chance to be drafted very highly by someone.

The babe moving up my draft board in a real hurry is Rachel McAdams--she stars as Claire Cleary in Wedding Crashers. She is amazing throughout the movie, gorgeous and funny; she's got to be drafted high, doesn't she? Great personality, no off-field issues I know of, incredible workouts...it all adds up to a winner in my book.

By the way, if you like comedies at all, you need to go see Wedding Crashers. It is one of the funniest movies I have seen in the last 5 years. I haven't laughed that hard in a theater since Anchorman (which I still contend is criminally underrated by most people). If you like Vince Vaughn at all, you will want to see this movie multiple times. It definitely earns it's R rating, but it is nice to see a comedy that doesn't try to sell out to attract the teen movie dollar, but instead goes all the way.

As for the weekend in sports, here are a few brief observations:

--There is no Big 5 in golf. There is Tiger, and there is everyone else. With his win at the British Open on Sunday, Tiger moved past Ben Hogan and Gary Player into third on the all-time majors list. Tiger has 10 majors for his career. Ernie Els, Vijay Singh, Phil Mickelson, and Retief Goosen combined have 9. Like I said, there is no Big 5. In addition, if Tiger could have made putts consistently at the U.S. Open, he would have won that tournament, and if he had putted well this weekend, he would have won the British by 10 strokes. His only competitition is history.

--Taylor/Hopkins was more an intriguing fight than a particularly good fight. I am very happy to see that Jermain Taylor is the new undisputed middleweight champion on the world, although the split decision victory was anything but undisputed. Scores of boxing writers from around the country adjudged the bout entirely differently than did the two judges who gave the bout to Jermain Taylor. I don't know how I feel about the fight, to be honest. I need to watch it again. Upon first inspection, I gave the bout to Taylor 115-113 due to activity level and accuracy. However, if you look at the punchstat numbers, you will see that Taylor actually landed 10 less shots than Hopkins, despite throwing much more. Indeed, Hopkins took the young challenger apart in the last few rounds of the fight, hurting him on more than one occasion and showing the composure and skills that have made him a middleweight legend. According to the judges, it was too late. One certain controversy, apart from the scoring as a whole: somehow, judge Duane Ford gave the 12th round to Taylor, when it was evident that Hopkins had dominated his opponent throughout. That kept the fight from being a draw. The biggest positive one can take from this fight is that the rematch has a decent chance of being staged in Memphis down at the Forum. It is logical--Memphis has proven its ability to stage big fights, Jermain Taylor is from Little Rock and would easily bring 7,000+ fans to Memphis, and HBO likes the setup at the Forum. It would appear that Memphis has a pretty good chance of staging the rematch.