FOXBORO, Mass -- Folks, let me tell you something right now: I don't like hyperbole. Never have, never will. It's simply not in my nature. But last night, in Gillette Stadium, in beautiful Boston, just 2.5 miles from at least 4 different Starbucks locations, I saw the sheer greatness of one dynasty elevated to levels unseen. I watched as Tedy Bruschi strode onto the field like a colossus and proceeded to exhibit the most courageous performance in human history.
KING'S LIST OF HISTORY's MOST COURAGEOUS MEN:
1. Tedy Bruschi
2. Bill Belichick
3. Tom Brady
4. Martin Luther King, Jr.
5. Tedy Bruschi
It would not be an exaggeration to say that my jaw quite literally dropped to the cold Boston ground as I came to grips with the enormity of what I saw. Truly there are men, and then there's Tedy Bruschi.
A humble man for one so great--he told me before the game as I polished his shoes, "Who's the hell is this at my feet? Oh, it's just you Peter, go ahead." What a leader. What a man.
Would that my daughter, or even my son (not that there's anything wrong with that) could be with Bruschi. What a lucky woman Jennifer, his beautiful (and, frankly, meddlesome) wife is. She sees the legend at his finest, and at his most intimate times, the times when the beast inside tames into a purring kitten.
KING'S LIST OF HISTORY'S GREATEST ACCOMPLISHMENTS:
1. Tedy Bruschi's comeback
2. Tedy Bruschi's first tackle vs. Buffalo
3. Invention of the wheel
4. Development of written language
5. Tom Brady's third Super Bowl title
Other receiving votes: development of government, man walking on the moon, construction of Great Wall of China, curing of polio/smallpox, Bill Belichick's decision to draft Tom Brady
FACTOID THAT MAY INTEREST ONLY ME:
Tedy Bruschi's eyes have the same regal yet terrifying glow of many of history's most feared leaders, including Alexander the Great, Ivan the Terrible, and Rasputin. Yet Bruschi is so kind. Dare I say even a Tedy bear?
AGGRAVATING/ENJOYABLE TRAVEL NOTE OF THE WEEK:
I recently had to walk almost 1/8th of a mile to find a Starbucks location, since the airline thoughlessly did not serve the rich, dark goodness of Starbucks on the plane itself. However, all was vindicated when I saw Tedy Bruschi himself in the Starbucks! Well, turns out it was just a guy that looked like Bruschi, but I still had to change my Sansabelt slacks.
GRIPE OF THE WEEK:
Why didn't ESPN devote more time to Tedy's remarkable story and incredible game? Was I the only one who knew about this story? There were actually times during last night's telecast, folks, where Mike Patrick, Joe Theismann, and Paul Maguire (who are typically not at all annoying) actually talked about the Buffalo Bills! Gang, this isn't about the Bills, this is about one incredible demigod and those that dare to reach his level. His name is Bruschi, and ESPN dropped the ball by covering Buffalo for such a long period of time.
NUMBER OF THE WEEK:
5 minutes, 25 seconds--the amount of time in last night's 3 hour telecast ESPN talked about Buffalo; come on, Bristol, we need more Bruschi!
BOLD PREDICTION OF THE WEEK:
Tedy Bruschi will cure AIDS within three weeks.
TEAM I LIKE TONIGHT (AND I DON'T MEAN THE PATRIOTS):
Actually, I do mean the Patriots. I like the Patriots a lot.